Pattern… This particular pattern is the complete opposite of Modal Operators of Necessity, in that instead of the language pointing to what has to be done, this
language refers to what could be done, using words such as, possible, would,
won’t, can’t, can, impossible. Again, we here this in everyday language and a
common example you may hear could be, “It’s impossible.” Here this person
believes that it is not possible to do what the statement implies: it is not possible to look good naked.
Response… The response you deliver to this type of statement is designed to open the person up to a new range of possibilities so they have more of an
awareness of choice around a particular problem. You’ll also have the ability
through asking a specifically structured question, to help uncover the reasons
behind the belief that seems to be holding the person back. You may respond
with something such as, “What stops you (from looking good naked)?” or “If you
could (look good naked), how would you go about it?”
Outcome… As the person digs deeper and begins to gain more awareness around the reasons that may be contributing to the problem, through your effective use
of questions, they will typically find that the strength of the bondage to the
problem will weaken. In many of the Meta Model responses, you will most likely
not get a complete cure for the problem just from asking one question. For
example, the person who thought it was impossible to look good naked will
probably not instantly think that it’s possible to look good naked, but by gaining new awareness around what is contributing to the problem, they will be much
more open to perceive these thoughts in a way that will allow for future
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breakthrough’s to occur, because they have more ways of breaking it down and
working with it.
Distortions: Unspecified Verbs
Pattern… Unspecified Verbs refer to where someone has shared something
without providing the full information. In this case, it’s missing a verb, and will usually come across as something such as, “She dislikes me.” When someone
shares something like this, the listener (and speaker) ends up curious as to what is really meant by ‘disliking’ and how the speaker was disliked.
Response… The response of to an unspecified verb is really designed to get below the surface response, and to extract additional information on the verb. That may show up as a question such as, “how exactly?” Which prompts the listener to dig
deeper to find out the meaning behind their statement.
Outcome... By asking a question that causes the listener to dig deep and find additional information, you are expanding their awareness to perceive the
problem from a different angle. This on its own may not be enough for the
problem to disappear, but it will provide a fresh new angle to look at it from. In this process, they will most likely come to understand how they perceive the
disliking, and this will pave the way for future potential resolutions with the other person. Either way, because the person has changed the way they look at this, the verb they were looking at will change (in meaning to them).