Returning again to the graphic of the human brain on page 36, let’s look at how our activities may cause negativity. There are many ways in which we entertain and work our minds. Often, we choose activities that cause barriers to our success by adding a continuous stream of negativity into our brains’ storehouse, rather than enriching our lives.
News Sources. How many different forms of the news do you see and/or hear each day? It comes by way of the radio, television, the newspaper, magazines, and the Internet via our computers. There are clipping services dedicated to providing specific types of news by email or mail.
Take a copy of your local, daily newspaper. Any day will do. Get a black and a red magic marker. Do the following:
• Using the black magic marker and the front page only, outline and X through anything that is negative. This would include the weather that’s generally in an upper corner, if the report isn’t a positive forecast.
• Now, take the red marker and outline and X through the remaining verbiage. It has to be positive information/news, or it would already be marked in black.
How much red do you see, as compared to black? (Our experience with this exercise has been that there’s very little red.) Now, envision multiplying the amount of black, which is the negative, times the number of pages in the newspaper; and then times the number of newspapers you read each day. That’s how much negative you are placing in your brain’s storage each day just from newspapers.
You can further compound the news in the newspaper by each time you listen to the news on the radio, even those short briefs every hour. Then, add in each news magazine and journal you read each month. Now, include the television news you watch — don’t forget the noon news, the nightly news, and the end of the day news programs, each are at least 30 minutes in length. How about the news shows — 60 Minutes, Meet the Press, Dateline NBC, The Today Show, and Good Morning America, just to name a few. Don’t forget the totally news cable channels — Fox, CNN, MSNBC, and so on. Then, there are the Internet news sites, web sites with news feeds on them, and news emails delivered to your inbox.
Your last exercise shows how much of the news is negative. How can you replace negative thoughts in storage with positive, when you bombard your senses with all this negativity on a daily basis. Do you really need to see and hear all this news?
Choose one form, once a day, and eliminate all the rest. For instance, only the nightly news that gives a brief accounting without all the details. The addition of images and brief interviews are like a picture — they are worth a thousand words. You get more in less time, without going in depth. You’re also getting the headlines, which concerns you the most. You don’t have to know about every problem across the world, in your state, city and neighborhood, or every little gruesome detail about a local murder.
Other Negative Sources. What type of books and magazines do you read? What type of movies and videos do you watch? Do you play electronic/Internet games? What television shows do you watch?
Constantly reading and seeing violent media adds additional negativity. Consider this: you love the forensic and justice television shows — NCIS; all the CSI shows; all the Law and Order shows; the forensic shows on the Discovery channel, the History channel, and the Arts & Entertainment channel; NUMB3RS; and Bones. This is just a portion of the forensic and justice shows on the television schedule this season. If you’re watching them all or even a good portion of them, look at all the negative you’re putting into your mind. Like the news, you don’t have to get rid of all of them. You could, for instance, choose to watch NCIS, the one CSI show you like the best, and NUMB3RS. Replace the other shows with positive, uplifting shows, or spend more time doing other activities. Also, be aware of the negativity given off by the “reality” shows.
To what music do you listen? How much alcohol and medication (or other drugs) do you ingest? How much caffeine do you intake? What type of things do you have in your home? On your walls? In your office? On your office desk? Do these things and activities energize you? Do they soothe you? Are your habits healthy? If your answer is no, then they are adding negative energy into you mind and body, contributing to stress and negative feelings. Again, replace what is negative with positive alternatives. These are all trade-offs you make for a better and more positive life.
Physical Comforts. One of the most difficult trade-offs is physical comforts. Many people never achieve their success, because they are not willing to “give up” anything in order to achieve their dream.
In the book, entitled “Rich Dad, Poor Dad”7, Robert T. Kiyosaki tells of the poor dad, who worked hard in a job to earn and borrow money for that nice home, car and what luxuries his meager salary afforded him. Whereas, the rich dad provided for his family’s necessities, never borrowed, and put every cent he had into his business (his dream). He had his family onboard with him, and it seemed they had a wealth of love and togetherness. They also had a back porch, screen door that was in sad need of repair for many years. The poor dad would have fixed it immediately; whereas, the rich dad felt the door still worked and the money to fix it served his family better being reinvested into the business. The poor dad remained in the same financial situation his entire life and continued to dream of being rich. The rich dad eventually moved his family into luxury and wealth.
Another example of trade-offs to achieve success is Jess P. Lair, Ph.D. In his book, entitled “I Ain’t Much Baby – But I’m All I’ve Got”8, he shares his success of finding himself and his true purpose in life. He was in advertising and doing quite well financially. He was successful but overworked and stressed out. He got a chance to evaluate how unhappy he was, while being wheeled into surgery for a heart attack, and remembered his dream of being a college professor. After he healed, he sat his family down and told them what he wanted to do. His family agreed, with reservations but with love for him. He sold his advertising agency and their luxurious home, and they moved to a farm (the other part of his dream). He enrolled in a nearby college. In the early ‘90s, when Dr. Lair wrote the book, he was a college professor. He has since written many other books.
7 Kiyosaki, Robert T. with Lechter, Sharon L., Rich Dad, Poor Dad: What the rich teach their kids about money – that the poor and middle class do not! Warner Books, 1998.
8Lair Ph.D., Jess P., I Ain’t Much Baby – But I’m All I’ve Got. Fawcett Books, 1990, reissue 1995.
Both of the above are excellent examples of people who temporarily traded off their comfort for success. Most people aren’t willing to do this because of fear and greed, which keeps them living paycheck to paycheck, barely earning enough to keep up with their spending, and slaves to money and their material possessions.
Do you really need the big house in the fancy neighborhood? Or could an apartment in another neighborhood, which costs less, do just as well? Do you need the large salary you currently make at a job that doesn’t contribute to your goal? Or can you make trade-offs in your lifestyle to allow yourself to take that job that will lead you to success?
We have bought into the American Dream of owning our own home, driving an upscale car, and constantly spending to get more. The advertising industry pays its creative minds lots of money to continue to sell you on this Dream. You must shut off such messages that continually surround and bombard you. Learn to live by the “beat of your own drum.”
• Make several copies of the “Eliminating Negativity” table on page 77.
• For the next week, list in the table all the sources of news you see and/or hear, as well as other sources of negativity. Review this chapter each day to ensure you’re locating as much of these negative sources as possible.
• At the end of the week, review the table’s news column. Create a plan of action by first eliminating as many news sources as possible. For example: Choose only one daily news source, such as the nightly news. Write “nightly news” in the plan of action, news column. Then, take a red pen and put one line through all the others in the first column to remind yourself that you will never watch, listen or read these again.
• Now, look at the other negative sources listed in column two. For all negative media, either eliminate them, choose only one or two, and/or substitute alternatives. For video gaming, either eliminate them all or choose only one and limit your playing time. For furnishings you have a negative feel about, burn dried sage to rid each room of negativity as the Native Americans do and use Feng Shui for furniture and item arrangements — or just replace the items. For all other items, such as alcohol, diet and drugs, use alternatives, elimination or reduction for positive results.
• Next, follow through on your plan of action. That may mean creating affirmations that are taped to the television set(s) and other such reminders
• Make several copies of the “Trade-Off” table on page 78.
• In the first column, list all the things you currently have or do that could be eliminated or substituted with alternatives AND, by doing so, would assist you to achieve your success — whether they are plausible or not.
• In column two, list what you would substitute for the items in column one. For example, the occasional concert and movies for the current civic center season tickets. A nice apartment, where someone else pays for the upkeep inside and out, for the two-story home that takes a lot of upkeep in both time and money. To create more harmony in your marriage, forego the weekly boys’ night out; instead, go only once a month and spend the other three nights doing something special with your wife. Look for positive alternatives.
• Now, create a plan of action, which may include discussing the idea with your spouse and anyone else the change may affect. Revise your plan of action as needed. Remember, not to create more change at one time than you and others are able to handle effectively.
Eliminating Negativity Table