Chapter 1:
Why Do We Need To Improve
Synopsis
At times, when all our questions, fears and insecurities wrap us up, we come up with the thought of “I wish I was somebody else.”
More frequently than not, we think and trust that somebody or rather, most people are better than us - when actually, the fact is, a lot of people are more frightened than us.
We see a young business entrepreneur and say, “what else could he need?” He stares at himself at the mirror and grumbles to himself, “I detest my eyes… I wonder why my prospects won’t talk to me….”
Isn’t it curious? We look at other people, envy them for looking so terribly perfect and wish we could trade places with them, while they consider us and think of the same thing. We're jealous of other people who themselves are jealous of us. We suffer from low self-regard, lack of assurance and lose hope in self-improvement and ever winning anyone over.
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The Basics
I have a friend that never gets sick of talking. And in most conversations, she's the only one who seems to be interested in the things she has to say. So all of our other friends tend to avoid her, and she doesn’t notice how socially hindered she is.
One key to self-improvement is to listen and speak to a trusted friend. Find someone who is easy to open up to. Ask questions like “do you believe I'm rude?”, “Do I sound argumentative?”, “Do I talk too loud?”, “Does my breath stink?”, “Do I ever bore you?”
In that way, the other person will obviously know that you're interested in self-improvement. Listen to comments and criticisms and don’t say things like “Don’t exaggerate! That’s simply the way I am!” Open your mind and heart too.
One of Whitney Houston’s songs says, “Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.” True! In order to love others, you have to love yourself as well. Remember, you can't give what you don't have.
Stop thinking of yourself as a second-rate being. Forget the insistent thought of “If only I was richer… if only I was thinner” and so on. Accepting your true self is the first step to self- improvement. We have to stop comparing ourselves to others.
We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. We constantly wish we had better things, better features, better body parts, and so forth. But life need not to be perfect for people to be happy about themselves.
Self-improvement and loving yourself isn't a matter of crying out to the whole world that you're perfect and you're the best. It’s the virtue of acceptance and contentment. Once we begin to better ourselves, we then are able to be convincing in a conversation with prospects.