What is a problem patient? The person who continually asks for your assistance. The person who refuses to cooperate with you. The person who makes personal comments about you of a derogatory nature. In fact all three are problem patients and can make your job seem twice as difficult. All three can be dealt with appropriately however with assertive behavior. You dont have to take abuse and neither should your bosses expect you too. Therefore it is imperative that you develop the right kind of assertive skills necessary in handling these patients. See class on how to be assertive. Likewise problem relatives can be just as difficult to manage. They come to you saying that there relative isnt being looked after properly. That you arent nursing them properly. That you are wholly responsible for the decline in health of their loved one. (Nothing to do with the illness or anybody else of course. Yes the nurse once again finds themselves on the frontline. Not a doctor in site. High emotion gives rise to anger often aimed at the nurse. Often the relative is feeling guilty and will try to displace some of that guilt onto the nurse. This is to make them feel better. But remember you dont have to take this and by being assertive you will not have to take the blame.
Okay now were going to deal with one of the most difficult subjects that of the dying patient (or dead). Why talk about this. Well as a nurse you may well come across it time and time again. For most people this subject is taboo. But for a nurse it can be a common occurrence. And having to handle death emotionally can be draining and soul destroying (after all arent we in the business of saving lives). We all die eventually. Nobody lives forever. I know this is a crass statement but it needs to be spelt out in order to make sense of it all. No matter how fit or well you may have been, with no illness you will die eventually. As a nurse death (the first one can be emotionally destroying. „I was only speaking to him yesterday. I became close him maybe too close. Are common statements made by nurses after a death? We have to build up relationships for therapeutic reasons. The when someones dies its like losing a member of the family. Okay stop there. We come into nursing for different reasons. To make a difference. To give something back. Because we care about our fellow suffering human beings. But whatever the reasons it stops when you put on your uniform. It has to else you deliver the best possible care you have distinguish quite clearly between sympathy and empathy. Sympathy is understanding someones pain on an emotional level. I.e. your emotions play a part of the relationship. Empathy is dealing with someones pain by understanding from an outsiders view. I.e. your emotions remain unaltered and unaffected. That doesnt make you a cold hard person. It makes you a stronger more capable person. And if you wont to have a long happy career youre going to have to toughen up on your emotions. But thats easier said than done you say. Im an emotional person with feelings. Well take a look around your ward. If you become emotionally upset over one person whats going to happen to the rest of these lovely patients.Whos going to care for these poor mites? Youve got to see the bigger picture to survive. Start right. Dont become emotionally attached. If you feel you are, distance yourself a little. You may not want too but believe me you are only going to hurt yourself and all the other patients if you dont. Secondly look at yourself hard. Why do you become emotionally attached? Is there something missing in your life. Something hurtful from the past. Let it go now. This will always interfere with your nursing and prevent you from moving on. Talk to others about how you feel. It often helps. Remember too that death is often the best possible outcome. To relinquish the suffering of another human being (see appendix on euthanasia). This is often the best thing for a human being. The sadness stays with the people which they leave behind. But life is continually evolving. Another human being is born and life goes on. Dont punish yourself by saying things like I could have done more. That is common. There will be lots of whys and a lot of if only. These statements are pointless. If you try to make sense of it all dont bother as there are no philosophical answers. Life is a wonderful mystery and if you are a god fearing person then you will know that he is the only one who knows the truth and true meaning of it all.