FALSTAFF: My honest lads, I will tell you what I am about.
PISTOL: Two yards and more.
FALSTAFF: No quips now, Pistol. I am in the waist two yards about. But I am now about no waste; I am about thrift. (33-36)
Despite his financial problems, Falstaff still enjoys a good pun, as does Pistol. The word about means (1) about to do and (2) around the waist. Pistol knows that Falstaff intends the first meaning, but he cannot resist making a joke by using the second meaning. And Falstaff responds by making an even wittier pun on the words waist and waste. The fat Falstaff does not wish to talk about either his waist or about the waste of money. Rather he intends to talk about thrift or being economical: he intends to talk about making money.
Falstaff then announces his plan to Pistol and Nym. The knight believes that Mistress Ford is attracted to him, and he knows that she controls the finances in her family. Thus, his plan is to seduce Mistress Ford so that he can obtain her money.
Falstaff has written two love letters: one for Mistress Ford and another for Mistress Page. The old knight believes that both women are extremely attracted to him and that he can get money out of them both. Falstaff informs his men, “I will be cheaters to them both, and they shall be exchequers to me” (60-61). Falstaff also puns on the word cheaters: it means both (1) someone who cheats, robs, or steals and (2) an escheater, an official who works