Returning to his room, he decided to lie down on his bed and do a bit of intellectual reading from this “book of bear”. He found himself looking forward to reading what new mysteries this book should offer.
“As you strive through your growth, there are times when one must take a break from the emotional stresses of learning. As you are thinking, maybe it is time to talk about intellectual issues. This lesson for you, now, is about ‘coincidence’.”
While he was surprised by the comment, given that he had just gotten through talking about coincidence prior to breakfast, here it was, it was not so big a surprise any more. The more he read, the less he became ‘unbalanced’ by these ‘coincidences.’
“Coincidence should be defined before we can discuss it. I mention this because, many times in speaking in a language, one word can mean many different things. One example of this is the word ‘sinister’. In most dictionaries, it will mention that it means ‘of ill intent’ or ‘evil’. Yet, at the same time, it means also, nothing more than ‘left-handed’. Due to cultural influence, being left-handed in some parts of the world is considered ‘evil’.”
“The same thing happens with the word ‘coincidence’. It means, quite simply, that two or more incidents or occurrences happen at the same time. That is all. It does not always have to be tied in to anything mystical. One situation may be, for example, a person may meet a friend who he or she has not seen in dozens of years due to looking at an e-mail site and finding a telephone number of that person. Why would this be coincidence? Some would say that it is ‘divine intervention’ to create this situation. Is it not possible that this is just how the melodrama of this life is supposed to happen?”
“Many times, human nature wants to not accept accountability for their actions, including creating these ‘co-incidences’. Whatever the reason, whether it is divine intervention or one’s own actions to create this occurrence, it happens. THAT is the important issue, not HOW it happened.”
“The word, coincidence, can be broken down into two parts — incidence — happening or occurring, and co — together. So, two or more things are happening together. That is all it means.”
“An example for you about the appreciation of coincidence, without worrying about the WHY factor is with you. Look where you are now. You are in your situation right now because you are. Certain things happened in your life to bring you to this point called now. These certain things were put in motion from at least the time of your birth. Decisions you may have made when you were five years old created you to take the turn you took to get to the ‘here and now’ you experience currently.”
“Instead of analyzing it to death, worrying whether you are doing the right thing or not, why not simply enjoy the coincidences, appreciate that you took your steps in your order because you did. It may, at times, feel as if you have gone in the wrong direction — and in the melodrama of life, you may believe so. However, your route is what brings you to the here and now ALWAYS. There is no exception. There is no WRONG way.”
“That brings us to the next intellectual point to ponder. Making the right decision.”
“You ALWAYS make the best decision at the time, given what you know at that time. ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS. Yes, it may be different after you get more information, but during the time you are in the middle of the drama, you ALWAYS make the BEST decision.”
“Here is yet another intellectual point to think about. It is okay to be selfish. We are selfish by nature. It is what being alive is all about.”
“Remember earlier, we talked about how definition can determine how someone perceives a concept? The same thing happens with the word ‘selfish.’ Be prepared for another bit of ‘culture shock’ with the concept that you always do things, no matter how giving it may be, for yourself.”
“Before I explain this concept, let me define the word — ‘selfish’ — to ‘think about yourself’. This can take on different connotations. One, is to be selfish to the exclusion of others. This is, as I am sure you know, the most common belief, and it can be destructive, not only to one’s own self but others as well.”
“The other is that one does things with inclusion. You include others in your thinking of yourself. Even one who donates a million dollars to a charity anonymously does it for selfish reasons — if for no other reason because it feels good, or it feels like the right thing to do. There is no problem in the universe with this kind of selfishness. It is how we all live. We do things we want to — always. After weighing the alternatives, the choices, we make the best decision at the time for what feels good/right/correct. Period.”
“With these concepts, how can you honestly say that you are evil or bad? You are always doing what you want to do and doing the best you can. Even your worst “mistakes” are there to teach how NOT to do it the next time, or to choose another way to do it when it happens again. And it WILL happen again. So these events are of great benefit.”
“The basic ideas I am trying to show you is that it is you who may, indeed, be responsible for not only your current state in this life regarding relationships, job, status in life, etc., but also your physical and emotional health. When you stop blaming others, you start to take accountability for yourself.”
“By the way, accountability is not blame, but just saying that you are the ‘creator’ of your condition. You had something to do with it. You made the decisions. You took the actions or the inactions. You did it to yourself, for yourself. Please remember that this means the ‘bad’ things as well as the ‘good’ things in your life as well.”
“I know this is radical thinking for many. Keep it in the intellectual realm, if you like. I am not saying this is 100% true. After all, look at the source of your reading — from a teddy bear! You hear my voice talking with you, giving you these messages you have heard since you came here. Is it your imagination? Maybe. Is it me? Maybe. Maybe it is everything. Maybe it is none of these. Maybe, just maybe, all of this is just an illusion and none of this is any more real than the dreams you were having last night.”
“Enough intellectualizing. It is time for you to go out and enjoy the sunshine. Someone has something to teach you, and you have something to teach them.”