Escape from Samsara by Amy Williams - HTML preview

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Chapter 8

A Divine Visit

 

In order to maintain my sanity and devote myself to some sort of practice, I had to go deep within myself and pray for help. I did my duties, chanted my rounds, went to classes and did the work of collecting money with books and incense. I was reasonably happy by the end of two years, when it was announced my spiritual master was coming to Atlanta for a visit. At the time, I was working as a seamstress for the deities on the altar, (statues of different incarnations of God). I polished brass, made flower arrangements and designed colorful clothing covered with sequins, beads and jewels . I actually taught myself how to sew, with some help. I cooked for 75 people every day and sometimes 200 people for a Sunday Feast. I sold books and incense and did my devotional practice of meditation. I felt I was making some spiritual progress despite my disdain for the organization. And I’m not trying to say I was good and others were bad. I had my issues. Sex, as you will see later in this story, consumes me!

Srila Prabhupada arrived in Atlanta on February 28, 1975. Everyone loved him. He was not the charismatic leader who was a taker. He was a giver. He gave his life and he gave us something we all wanted desperately, and that was Krishna. He only wanted to give us truth, and it was obvious. And very tactfully he told us how we were in illusion, that we were not these bodies. “The reality never dies, he said, and the illusion never lasts. Our material bodies perish and yet our spirit soul never dies. Krishna is your eternal lover and He will never leave you, he said. Every other relationship, life after life, will end, but your relationship with Krishna will get stronger and stronger and stronger, ever increasing in eternity, knowledge and bliss, ‘sat, chit, and ananda’”. I wanted that for myself.

I met Srila Prabhupada five times, as I said before. This meeting in Atlanta was an extra-ordinary one because it was my home temple. The night before he came I was up all night getting clothing ready, making sure his appointed seat, Vyasasana, was ready. The next morning the devotees were going to meet him at the airport but I stayed behind. That was ok. Someone was required to make sure things were ready when he arrived. I fell asleep in the closet, filled to the max with turquoise silk and peacock feathers as a bed, just before the devotees went to the airport. Someone woke me up after about an hour and a half of sleep to inform me Srila Prabhupada would be here at any second. I pulled myself together and made it in time to come face to face with him as he entered the temple room. He paused before the altar and observed the deities, then offered his respects by touching his head to the floor and went to his elevated seat for a short welcome speech. While speaking, we witnessed what we thought was a sort of miracle. Tears shot from his eyes as if erupting from a volcano, but instead of up, they went straight out. He expressed his gratitude for all the book distribution we had done in his behalf and how his own spiritual master was also very happy. Wow! There are some moments in a person’s life that are simply amazing and this was one.

Devotees were there from all over the United States, but mostly from the East coast, Washington DC, Miami, Gainesville, New York, Pittsburgh and West Virginia. The atmosphere was surcharged with love and light and pure ecstasy as he spoke about the wonderful past times of the Lord. He was extremely happy with both the deities on the altar as well as the devotees who occupied the temple.

We already thought we were special because we were leading the movement in book distribution and we knew this made him very happy. So, although he was humble, we were somewhat puffed up. He was translating Srimad Bhagavatam, Chaitanya Charitamrita and so many other books day after day and we were told he worked until around 2:00 am every morning, slept for only a few hours and then woke to preform his daily meditation. We felt it was our privileged duty to distribute those books. And no one understood how he could be getting only two hours sleep a night. We were all amazed at his super-human activities and were more than happy to distribute those books to the world. There in Atlanta, he showered mercy on us by thanking us for our sacrifice and we were certainly feeling that our own auras were extending to all corners of the universe.

Srila Prabhupada glowed like the sunshine. You can just imagine the energy given to him caused his aura to shine, but his own humility, gratitude, love and devotion were overwhelming. He was certainly not like any man we knew! Just think of it. Most men are pursuing career goals either in business, sports or whatever. Others may be priests or monks, but most were all admittedly not pure of heart. The false ego leads us to deplorable places and we all have that issue. But he did not. He simply served his spiritual master and took no credit whatsoever for anything, an unbelievable factor to those of us who met him. Unbelievable! Tears filled our eyes when we glanced his way. It was like only by seeing him our sins were washed away, we thought. I know those words seem fantastic, or even fanatic, but those feelings made us think about how people washed the feet of Jesus with their tears and at the same time became pure of heart. We literally felt cleansed and energized by his presence and his humility.

Really, I cannot say enough about Srila Prabhupada. He spread Krishna Consciousness all over the world in fourteen years with some 10,000 disciples in North America and South America, Europe, India and even some islands. I could go on and on about how wonderful he was, but I think you get my message. He was the hope of every searching hippie, theologian and college professor. He literally pulled back the curtain of illusion and flooded us with the reality of Love. What to say? I was hooked, cult or not! And my goal was to find a way to avoid going into the womb yet another time.

I had my first initiation in San Juan, Puerto Rico, but my second initiation kept getting postponed. I felt like something was wrong with me and that I was not good enough to be a brahmin. The truth was, I realized later, I was more of a vaishya or business woman than a brahmin. Anyway, when Srila Prabhupada came to Atlanta I got the chance to get second initiation directly from him. I was ushered into his room covered in white sheets. He was sitting on the floor at a small desk and ask me to sit down beside him. That’s when I realized how stupid I really was! I was so enamored by his presence, I was simply staring at him as he showed me how to say the mantra and count by using the joints on the fingers of my right hand. He slapped my hand and said, “Pay attention!” Many years later I realized what a double blessing that was. One was that he passed energy or shakti to me by touching me. The other was that he gave me a direct instruction and as I look back at my life, I realized that paying attention was exactly what I needed to do. My mother called me scatterbrain since I was a child. She was right.

One verse in the Srimad Bhagavatam declared, “This Beautiful Srimad Bhagavatam is like a light that will benefit all human beings by distinguishing reality from illusion for the welfare of all.” Srila Prabhupada was helping us to see this. I saw it on that special day. One more Fire Sacrifice and I was officially wed to my guru and to God.