THE NEW SWINGTON ESTATE
0300HRS
[The siren goes off at the main entrance to New Swington Estate. The
night guard limps towards the cruiser]
SERGEANT BARRY CHARGER
Hey Strauss, long time no see. We are here regarding some domestic
disturbance calls.
STRAUSS THE GUARD
[inaudible]
…long eno…
SERGEANT BARRY CHARGER
For fuck’s sake take the bloody mask off Strauss. We can’t hear fuck all.
STRAUSS THE GUARD
[takes the mask off irritated]
Took you guys long enough. I hate to put it to you. But it ain’t coming
HOOPTE GOBBLEDYGOOK
from here. That would be Old Swington. Whoever they are, really tried
bursting my eardrums with whatever the hell it was they were singing.
A week ago, this was the quietest neighbourhood in all of Cosgrove
County. Now it has turned out to be quite the music festival. Though it
has died down. Pretty quickly I would say. You stink garlic by the way.
SERGEANT BARRY CHARGER
[Gives the guard his best stink eye and turns the car around]
Piss off! See you around Strauss.
CONSTABLE DIRTH RUOTA
Did he just show us the middle finger?
CONSTABLE SAMMY MENSA
Something is eating up Mr Strauss. Must be the social distancing.
[chuckles]
SERGEANT BARRY CHARGER
He is alright. Don’t judge him by this one encounter.
CONSTABLE SAMMY MENSA
I heard he was one hell of a cop before the accident.
SERGEANT BARRY CHARGER
Another time. I don’t want to get into it right now.
CONSTABLE SAMMY MENSA
Seems we have time Serge. We are responding to an expired argy-bargy.
SERGEANT BARRY CHARGER
[casts another stink eye]
Not so long ago I was sleeping in my new bed, cuddling my beautiful
wife. Then I receive a call from who else but the Super. Now I am stuck
with the two patrol officers on duty for the night. So God help me and
everyone around me if the call turns out to be a prank or expired as you
put it. And no, this is not the time to talk about Strauss. He was a bloody
good cop. Let us leave it at that.
CONSTABLE SAMMY MENSA
Sorry Serge. I didn’t mean to-
CONSTABLE DIRTH RUOTA
No welcome gate here. No guard too.
CONSTABLE SAMMY MENSA
I suppose the government forgot to place the military or some form of
security. Must be the social distancing. Only the hourly patrols will do
for now.
[chuckles]
SERGEANT BARRY CHARGER
[laughs]
They tried to remove all evidence of the existence of the Old Swington
Estate. I have fond memories of it. There used to be a great Café with
lovely chocolate crusted doughnuts and some spectacular coffee. They
had a way of spicing up the coffee that was just sublime.
[gazes for a moment before coming back to the present]
Okay people, let us see what we got here.
CONSTABLE SAMMY MENSA
Boy is it dark. It is Old Swington alright. Or whatever is left of it. I guess
it is time for some torches.
HOOPTE GOBBLEDYGOOK
* * *