Upstairs, mother and daughter begin their meal with great pleasure at their intimate moment. “Tell me about the party, Mom. What’s planned so far?” begs Trixie.
Between bites, Lucy explains the party preparations to date. When she describes the menu, Trixie objects to all the meat.
“Leg of lamb! The poor little thing. I think I’m going to be a vegetarian.”
“Fine. There’ll be plenty of vegetables. Potato salad, green salad, bean salad, bread, squash. You like squash now that you’re a vegetarian.”
“Well-of course.”
She frowns with, “The thing is, it just keeps getting bigger and bigger. It’s like Grandma’s family is growing.”
“How many people will be there?”
“Well, your Grandma’s still talking to people. She’s really on a roll now. She keeps getting in touch with more and more people—her old friends and Grandpa’s old friends, and her new friends, and us, of course.”
“Well, it is her party. Who exactly is ‘us,’ now?”
“It’s not really an affair for Dad’s side of the family, though I think he’s mentioning it to them. I think one of your cousins from that side of the family might show up.”
“Oh. Probably Collin’s skiing partner. The one he saw with Uncle Mac at Christmas--Gerard. Jay-rarr.”
“That’s right. Oh, yes, one of the nieces, the one who’s staying in BC—Nona. You met her at Christmas. And I think she wants to bring friends. She’s saying two now but I don’t know if that’s it. On my side, your uncles haven’t confirmed. I should give them a firm deadline.”
“Of course, I know Nona, Mom. Come on. She stayed with us…Yeah. Tell those guys to come or just forget it. No more invitations.”
“You wanna get tough, huh? You know, I don’t think it’s a lack of commitment, dear. I think it’s difficult juggling the schedules. Also, it’s a big trip for a family. But Grandma’s sons should be there, at least for the main event. She naturally will want to see all her grandchildren.”
“Yeah! Like, how often will she turn 70?”
“Good point. We’ll take another shot at convincing them to decide to come, then.”
“Yes.”
“As for us-us, I mean us here in this household. We’re all going. It looks like Minsun’s parents will be here by then and he says they’d be delighted to go to the party.”
“Wow. That’s great. But I don’t think they speak English.”
“Which is why I’m suggesting that they bring a friend or two from around here. They know a couple in Vancouver somewhere.”
“So that’s five of Minsun and his family, four of us-us here, plus that boy cousin, Nona plus maybe two…”
“Grandma wants Bonnie to be there, and you know how she is. She’s always asking Bonnie to bring her friends out with them. So, remember the Filipina women we met in Victoria at Christmas? That’s three of them plus two or three dates—making them a party of up to six. Your Grandma says Bonnie will have a new man, or, at least, a date by then.”
“Really? That’s cool. Grandma’s sure changed lately.”
“She’d doing well, hon. These days I don’t worry about her at all.”
“Good!”
“So—I don’t know. I think we should allow for, say, 12 of Grandma’s friends in addition to Bonnie and company. And, Grandma’s in touch with some of her remaining cousins—you’ll meet two or three.
“So we should say 40 guests.”
“Yes, but we better be ready for 50, in case. Even 55 counting the musicians, the server from the catering company, and the bartender.”
“Better to have too much food than not enough.”
“Exactly, Trix. What a managerie it will be! I hope it works. I mean, I hope everyone gets along and has a good time.
“And we’ll have the whole weekend to get to know everybody?”
“Yep. There’ll be a lot of things for people to do, depending on the weather and their tastes and preferences. The Rowing Club facility is located at a sports complex. There are ice rinks, a swimming pool, tennis courts, nature trails, parks with gardens, an art gallery, a pioneer village, and even a shopping mall around there. Even trail riding. Rhododendrons should be in bloom by then, although the weather will still be a little cool. The flower of Burnaby is the rhododendron.”
“Wow! I do hope the weather will be nice. I like boats.”
“It’s usually sunny there in March, and warmer than here. No snow. So people might feel like going outdoors. If someone brings a canoe or row boat, we could go boating. But there are no boat rentals there. Anyway, there’s always shopping and driving around, not to mention eating, of course.”
Trixie laughs a bit. “There’s always eating! And we, a few of us, could visit Grandma for tea. Hey, we could take the leftovers from the party and make lunch at her place.”
“Maybe. Good idea. Grandma wants to host a couple of out-of-town friends. She says they’re younger, so I think it’ll be alright.”
“Yeah. Good for Grandma. Oh. Is Nona’s mom coming?”
“I don’t think she can. Her sister’s in a pretty bad way now. But, we did ask Noreen, Nona’s mom, to invite Nona’s father. That’s your uncle on Dad’s side, the one who remarried.”
“Oh, him. I wonder if Nona talks to him much?”
“I don’t know. I think the idea is to get them talking more. Back to attendance and accommodations. So we’ll stay in a hotel. Yes, a nice hotel, one not far away. I booked six rooms, three for us and the Lees and three for whoever else will need one when the party takes place.”
“Do I have to share a room with Collin?”
“No. Why don’t you sleep on a cot in Mommy and Daddy’s room? Collin can share a room with Minsun and Gerard. Minsun’s parents can take the fourth room. Unless they stay with their Vancouver friend. We should check with Minsun.”
“I see. Okay. Do you and Daddy have to pay for all those rooms?”
“We’ll pay for two. Minsun’s parents and everyone else would have to pay for their own rooms. I wouldn’t be surprised, however, if your grandmother helped them out. She says she wants to pay for her own party and help out people from out of town. She’s never done that before. I think she was so frugal—that means thrifty, penny-saving—before that. She must have a wad to spend now. Well, she’s doing a lot of things she never did before, or hasn’t done in a long while at any rate.”
“She is, isn’t she? I think she should live it up before she gets too old.”
“She should indeed.”
Minsun waits at the bus stop. The bus should come along within two minutes. He’s used to winter weather but it is definitely colder here in this land in the wintertime. He also observes that the wind blows just as hard.
Minsun takes a few moments, to review his visit to Canada, once again. In January, his Canadian family used to drive him to the bus stop. Collin was always coming and going and they could not rely on him to go with Minsun every day. Collin is nice enough, even if he is different and hard to understand. Minsun is more confident being with Collin and more confident taking the bus, even though it still seems strange on the bus. Today, he walks to the bus stop with Collin, slipping and sliding on ice or trudging through snow.
Minsun’s parents already have a lot of respect for the McLaren family. Besides the fact that Mr. and Mrs. McLaren are good and responsible homestay parents, the McLarens have paid back some of the money that the homestay program gives them for Minsun to return to his parents. It is their secret. Mrs. McLare explained that they can afford to repay some money and that the main reason Minsun is there is to provide friendship. Minsun has been very happy about that, because it is difficult to bear the responsibility of succeeding well in order to honour his parents who have sacrificed a lot and borne a great burden for his sake. He knows his family experiences hardship in paying for his privileged education. His father has a good regular job in government administration, but it is hard work and sometimes stressful. His mother works hard at home and sometimes works in a supermarket or their friends’ coffee shop to add income for his and his sister’s education. The children must pay back and do the family proud by working hard and doing well in school. Later, Minsun and his sister will be pressed to take part-time work and start saving what they can.
The money that is returned to his parents can be used for his parents to fly to Canada to visit him in March. What is more, Grandmother McLaren is providing some money for their airfare because, she says, “You are one of the family, and my grandson, while you are in Canada.” That is just so amazing, Minsun tells himself and his parents. (He does not want to brag or make his new Korean friends envious.) His parents, however, first rejected the money. His mother felt too proud. “We do not need a foreigner’s charity!” she insisted. She did concede that supporting their visit to see their son was a responsible act and a wise use of the homestay money. She is glad to know that good will can go before money in Canada too. Furthermore, it was proper of a Grandmother, the Grandfather not being present, to offer such a gift. In the end, they relented and accepted the money.
Grandmother McLaren has invited his parents to stay at a hotel for the big birthday party. So far, it is just an option in case it makes it easier on the Lee’s in Vancouver. It is a generous gesture, but, again, his family is reluctant to accept “charity.”
The birthday party will be fantastic, he thinks. For one thing, he is used to big events with lots of people and he likes doing things in groups. It will be especially great to be part of a special Canadian family birthday party. His parents know a Korean family in Vancouver, though, and will visit them after a couple of nights in the hotel. If they want, they can go visit Grandmother McLaren at her house in Victoria. Then they will come to Calgary and stay in the McLaren’s house. He does not understand how he could be so lucky, and he feels very grateful. Some students are not happy with their homes in Canada and have problems with their homestay parents and their birth parents. Not many parents can visit from abroad.
At school, he was with the other foreign students all through January. In January, they had special classes for the foreigners mostly, except for art and gym. But now they attend regular classes with the Canadians, including math, science and drama. They do not take English classes, because they have already studied English as a foreign language a lot. The Canadian classes are literature classes, of course, and the foreign students cannot keep up. Rather, the foreign students attend the classes that are not language intensive, like math and gym.
He has met other Koreans with whom he can talk and eat with. What a relief! He would not have come to this place had there not been a promise that other Koreans would be in the program. It would be too hard without some countrymen.
The Koreans have all gone out together and they visited Minsun at the house a couple of times. Their company makes it less lonely.
The mothers have packed suitcases with Korean food and sent more besides. However, he does not know how to cook anything except to boil water for ramyeong. When the Koreans students meet in the host homes, however, the girls shop and cook and manage to make some Korean dishes. They found kimchi and stuff at some Asian food store. It has felt wonderful to have familiar food!
There are also students from South America, China and other places. It’s really interesting. On certain days, the students have been taking turns talking about their home countries. They bring things and show pictures and videos. The Korean students made presentations as a group project. It was fun preparing. Their parents advised them on what to talk about; they were quite excited about the prospect. The girls talked about hanboks, movies, education and kimchi and other food, the guys about sports, music, industry and some history. When it was his turn, Minsun talked about baseball. He had not wanted to say too much, though, because baseball is not a top sport in Canada. They are supposed to go to a rink to learn hockey later in the program, which could be fun, thinks Minsun, although he has not skated much in his life. There are Russians and other Europeans who also like hockey. The Chinese and Koreans are the odd ones out when it comes to hockey.
He can talk about soccer with the foreigners, especially the South Americans. The Chinese do not play soccer or baseball much. The Canadians know a lot more about soccer than the Chinese students; the schools in Canada have soccer teams and even some girls play soccer in the warmer months. Then there are the indoor soccer fields. He has seen one and he would love to play there but the indoor soccer clubs are expensive, they say.
The bus rolls up and hisses as the doors open and the passengers file inside. It is toasty inside this school bus, so many of them loosen their outerwear in order to bear it. The two youths find seats in the middle of the bus.
Collin and Minsun discuss the Avatar movie during the bus ride. They both like it a lot.
The two usually can find something to talk about. But each is a mystery in the eyes of the other. “He’s so romantic,” remarks Collin to his parents. “And, he is always talking about careers and good behavior.” “A philosopher, perhaps,” replied Lucy.
“Don’t you want to find a sweetheart some day, a true love?” asked Minsun to Collin one day.
To Collin, privately, this was a strange question for a young teen to ask. “I like girls, sure. I guess it’d be good to find the love of my life eventually. But it’s way too early to talk about that, man. I mean we’ve got stuff to do and we need to have some fun first. There will be university and all that. I have to think about what I might like to do, in the future, I mean what kind of job and lifestyle. I think about it sometimes, but—my dad and my friends say there’s plenty of time to work that out.”
“How can you make any choices now, if you are haven’t got a real goal yet?” queried Minsun.
“I don’t have to yet. My parents have some ideas, and so does the school counselor, but, hey, no pressure. I think about what they say, a bit anyway. They also tell me to see what I like, and do things I like, so that I’ll be able to know what I want and what’s best for me. Take it easy. Don’t sweat, Minsun.”
“But you’re the oldest child and you’re the son.”
“Well, what about that?”
Minsun explained something about father right in Korea, and the rank of oldest siblings. Higher rank, by age and paternity, carry responsibilities to the family in Korea. Minsun also being the eldest and a boy, had to succumb to heightened attention by the family, and all the discussions about him and his future. Plans were already in the works. His grandfather was behind it all, as was his father’s eldest sister. The decision for Minsun to go to Canada and take this study program among foreigners for six months had all been carefully decided out and the financing of this and further ventures was being well orchestrated. There was respect, loyalty, faith, and duty. He tried to explain these values to Collin but Collin did not seem to understand much.
“You’re way too heavy, Minsun. That means you’re too serious,” said Collin often.
“Don’t your parents talk about your future? Don’t they want you to do things?”
“A little, now and then. But they let the teachers work some of it out. They talk to the teachers. My folks—that’s my parents, they want me to do well in school and do extra stuff like joining clubs or taking lessons. But they let me do what I feel like. So I’m taking guitar and I do sports at school. The school is supposed to take care of it.”
“Do you go to academies?”
“To what?”
“To study, to learn more. To prepare for the big exams. Do you and your friends go to another school to study more, like math or a language? At night or on Saturdays? I had to study math, music and English in academies. When I was nine years old, I started doing that.”
“Ooh, that’s harsh. I mean it’s difficult. We don’t have to do big government exams, if that’s what you’re talking about. No, we don’t go to other schools. Except, we take things like swimming, drawing, or music lessons after school. Things like that. Hey, I haven’t told you that I took taekwondo for two years.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. When I was 10, I started going to taekwondo lessons twice a week.”
“Did you like it?”
“It was fun. Did you learn taekwondo?”
“Of course! For five years.”
Collin discussed Minsun’s attitudes and beliefs with his dad. “It’s a different life over there, in Korea, no doubt,” noted his father after some reflection. “And I think they had a lot of hardship there. You know it was a poor country when the Japanese took over, and then there were two wars, World War Two and the Korean War. Korea, well South Korea got very rich very quickly only about 20 years ago, you know. They know what hard work is. They probably value security and prosperity very highly. …Just try to listen and let it sink in. This is a good experience. Maybe we’ll understand better later,” advised father to son.
In school, Minsun spends a few hours a week in the intensive English-as-a-second language classes. For the remainder of his class time in school, he attends classes that require minimal use of English such as PE, art, and computer science. The teachers are friendly and seem to offer encouragement.
Life in the classroom is very different from what he is accustomed. Students are expected to speak up and move around, which is not the case in schools in South Korea. He feels shy and uncertain for the first few weeks. It is a confusing situation, which adds to his inhibitions about voicing actual sentences in the foreign tongue.
English sounds strange to him even after a few weeks. He knows the words, but it usually comes out wrong. Everyone acts as though they do not notice, though, which makes him suspect he is being treated like a little child. He worries.
The class is active and he is asked to reply or read aloud frequently, to his initial annoyance. He would rather sit passively at the back of the class and write notes and do exercises in a workbook, but teachers will not leave him be. It is almost as if he is being harassed.
However, some of the lessons are intriguing and others very entertaining. The students get used to trying to speak and be understood in their varying accents. They learn to accept it and laugh at the mistakes. Teachers assure them they are improving.
His classmates come from various places around the world including South American and Africa. It is thrilling to get to know them and make friends with people all over the world. He often writes to his Korean friends about them will full descriptions and photos.
The ESL kids go out on excursions sometimes. They visit many places from malls to museums. They receive little gifts and take numerous photographs.
In the mixed classes, Minsun can show off his speedy prowess on computers and demonstrate the latest in phones and games to his classmates who look on in awe. In the gym, he is quick and confident, especially at soccer and basketball, sports much revered in Korea and elsewhere. The boys are very competitive at those games. Minsun would like to play baseball with his mates, but winter conditions prevent it.
He is taken to a hockey game and given a lesson in shooting the puck, which is a lot of fun and another memorable time to write home about. He has learned to skate but kids do not go ice skating very often in Korea. The skate boots feel too narrow. He therefore slips and slides on the ice. When it is his turn to try shooting three pucks, he strikes the first one very shakily and almost falls down. People around him laugh but not in a mean way. The coach shows him the optimal body position and indicates he should try again. The second shot is better, though lacking in force and therefore not compelling. On the third try, he musters all the fierceness he can and stares at the net at the end of the rink until it seems to expand in size. With great determination, he takes another swing and fires the puck directly down the ice into the net. There are whoops of congratulations.