Jess picked the girls up from school, gave them all a big hug and took them home for tea and cake. She’d caught a glimpse of Jade and Ben outside the school gates, but she and Jade continued the pretence that they didn’t know each other, and that was fine by her.
She wondered how much Jade knew; what story Dave had given her. Whether Jade too regarded Alice as the scheming, man-eating, money-grabbing tart she was made out to be by her husband and that witch of a lawyer. And in particular, whether Jade knew Ben had two half-sisters.
Above all, she wanted to put it out of her mind. Attending to the girls’ every need was top of her agenda and would normally have been the perfect distraction, but every time she looked at Sophie and Lucy, she saw an image of Dave. It had never bothered her before. He had totally slipped out of her consciousness, but now he was back, making vile assertions about her and demanding access to the twins. It was all too horrible to contemplate.
And when she’d put the children to bed and sat up alone with a glass of wine, or lay in her own bed unable to sleep, she could think of nothing other than that repulsive man, touching her, touching her children, defiling their innocence, poisoning their lives with his lies.
Michael had told her there was nothing for either of them to do in the meantime except wait. He expected to receive a letter in the next couple of days from Laker, Neal and Robson setting out their demands and once he got that, they’d plan what to do next.
She’d already ruled out going to the police. Michael didn’t have to convince her that her story was simply not credible; all the evidence was against her, none of it in her favour. If she thought she had any chance of winning, any chance of getting him put away, or even succeeded in keeping him away from her family, she’d happily endure the harshest interrogation, the deepest humiliation and the profound shame that would accompany it. But she didn’t. She had no chance and she knew it.
But she wrestled with one question she hadn’t been able to answer for herself. Why would a man like Dave Morley, with all his vulgarity, his tasteless humour, his arrogance and complete lack of sensitivity, deign to accept parental responsibilities for two families? In the normal world, a single mother would have tracked down the father, demanded maintenance, and, on the basis of DNA evidence alone, it would have been granted. The circumstances behind the twins’ conception would be utterly irrelevant and open neither to question nor debate.
Maybe she was the one he wanted. Maybe he wanted to carry on as he had left off, despite being married to Jade and having a small son of his own. Maybe he just wanted a bit on the side. The thought was repugnant, but anyway, she judged there were cheaper and easier ways to inveigle himself into her affections; by saying sorry, for example, not by going straight to expensive lawyers. But the more she thought about it, the more it became clear.
If Dave was the same repulsive monster she’d always thought, then he could have no inherent desire to take responsibility for another family. So, if he didn’t want that, what did he want?
***
The call came two days later.
“I’ve had a letter.”
Jess put down her iron and sat down at the kitchen table, pressing her phone to her ear.
“Do I need to come in and see you?”
“It’s very long-winded, but I can tell you what it says. It goes into great depth explaining the procedure by which they will be able to prove parentage and apply to the court for the requisite order and proposals for access rights, et cetera, et cetera. Just Pauline racking up the bill, I suspect.”
“Nothing we didn’t expect?”
“Except, they’ve given us a get-out clause.”
“What does that mean?”
“It’s what I always thought, Jess. He has absolutely no interest in being the father of twins.”
“But he is the father.”
“Yes, we all know that. But he also knows that you don’t want anything to do with him. He also knows, or thinks he knows, that you’re well off.” She let the thought sink in and it all dropped into place. How stupid.
“Money.”
“Precisely. He wants money. He’s prepared to walk away, sign a self-restraining order and promise never to come near you or your family ever again.”
“Provided we pay him.”
“They call it compensation.”
“How much?” It was the only question that mattered, if it mattered at all. There was a way out and she would take it. She would willingly give up everything to keep her children safe. It only mattered that they had something left to live on and the speed with which this whole sorry saga could be concluded. It was of no relevance how much he wanted; he could have it all.
“Two hundred and fifty.”
“Thousand?”
“Each.”
“Half a million?” She rested her forehead on one hand and considered it. For three seconds.
“Pay it!”
“Jess …”
“Pay it, Michael. Get rid of him. I want rid of him.”
“Jess, hold on. You have to think this through.”
“Why?” She knew she was getting wound up again and she hated it, but here was an escape route and she had to take it now before it closed up again.
“They don’t want that much. That’s just their opening bid.”
“How do you know!?” she said, increasingly frustrated at his calmness. How can you be so calm?
“Think about it. You know and I know he has no interest in the kids. He’s already got a family. You told me what he’s like, and from the brief encounter I had with him last week, I can believe it. He only ever wanted money and he’ll take a lot less. They expect us to haggle with them.”
“I’m not haggling over the price of my children!” she shouted.
“I’m sorry. Poor choice of words. What I mean is, if they assume we’ve already drawn the same conclusion and are ready for them, then they’ll assume we’ll make a counter-offer. If we just accept their figure, they’ll see how weak we are, how desperate we are and how deep our pockets are, and ask for more.”
“I’m sorry if I sound desperate, Michael, but that’s because I am,” she said. She had calmed herself, for the moment.
“I suspect half of that sum is still a huge amount of money to him and that’s the amount he’ll settle for.”
“So what are you suggesting?”
“I propose we write back, acknowledge parental rights, consider offering him access—”
“NO!”
“Consider offering him access,” he repeated calmly, “but suggest that if he would like to waive his parental rights in perpetuity, we are prepared to offer him the sum of one hundred thousand pounds.”
“What if he says no?”
“He won’t. We’ll settle at two, two fifty at the most.”
“And what if we don’t”
“Then we’re no worse off than before.”
“I don’t know, Michael. I’m worried.”
The voice came back. Calm, measured, confident and soothing.
“Jess, trust me. We have to take control of this. They’ve shown their hand. We now know what he wants and we know how badly he wants it. No matter what you might think about the threat he poses, he won’t carry it out. He doesn’t have anything to use against you other than your own fear.”
“Let me think about it.”
“I’ll draft a reply and call you tomorrow.”
***
He was right, of course. As usual. She’d lain awake for days worrying about it and eventually she had to acknowledge it was fear that had taken hold, fear that was driving her decisions. She had the financial resources to deal with the problem. She had the resources even to pack her kids into the Range Rover and take them away to somewhere he wouldn’t find them, another part of the country, Australia, Canada even.
And now she had proof that all he wanted was money, it seemed to make it a lot easier. It was the least worst of all the options and if she could be sure she would never see him again, it was worth it. She was still determined to sell the house, and this business with Dave now made it inevitable they’d move further away from Chalton to ensure she never bumped into him or Jade by accident or otherwise.
But her fear wouldn’t go away completely. She knew what he was and what he could do, and whatever legal agreement he signed, she didn’t trust him to stick to it. As soon as he’d blown all the money, or at least had the appetite for more, he’d be back, and she couldn’t bear the thought that she might have to fight him all over again. She needed a guarantee he’d disappear. The trouble was, she knew there were no guarantees in life. Ever.
Above all, and despite how financially secure she was, she didn’t feel safe or in control, and by extension, she feared for the safety of her children. Peter had once made arrangements that he thought would guarantee their safety and security, and now even that wasn’t enough. She wondered what it would take, how much it would take to do that. And she wondered what would have happened had Peter still been alive. Despite Michael’s help and support, and his pledge to continue supporting her, she still felt alone. Still felt there was someone missing.
She looked at the bedside clock. It was eleven thirty. She noticed a pale shadow on the wall by the door adjoining the two bedrooms. She sat up.
“Leila? What’s up, darling? Can’t you sleep?”
Leila wandered over and climbed into bed next to her, and they cuddled up together.
“You can’t sleep, Mummy. I know you can’t sleep.”
“I’m fine, sweetie. Just not very tired.”
“Are you thinking about that nasty man?”
“No, of course not.” That’s a lie. Don’t tell your children lies. She kissed her daughter’s head and squeezed her. “He is a nasty man but Michael has told him to go away, and he will.”
“Was Daddy a nasty man?” Oh God. No lies.
“No. Daddy was a bad man.”
“Are all men nasty and bad?”
“No, sweetie. Not all men. Michael’s a nice man.”
“Was your daddy a bad man?” Jess winced. There was no way she could explain that one. Not yet.
“Ooh, that’s a story for another day. I promise I’ll tell you all about it. Mm, when you’re fourteen. Okay?”
“Okay.”
They lay quietly for a moment, both of them wide awake, both of them thinking. There was something Jess needed to know. She’d never brought up the subject, partly because she feared it might be too distressing for Leila, but mainly because she was afraid of the answer. But here and now, it seemed the right time.
“The man with the belt. He was a bad man, wasn’t he? Tell me about him.”
Leila took in a deep breath. Jess held hers.
“Mm, I shall tell you when I’m twelve,” she announced with aplomb. Jess blinked at the unexpected answer, but she took comfort that she could sense no latent trauma, no element of denial or delusion. Just a young woman, ahead of her time, emulating her mother.
“Okay, sweetie. Or any time before then if you want to.”
“Simon’s a nice man,” she declared, and Jess smiled, a prickling sensation at the back of her neck. Her daughter had a gift, a sixth sense. An ability to think beyond the superficial, conventional senses that seemed to guide and influence everything her mother did. A sixth sense, not just to recognise Simon as a nice, good man, but one that also recognised that her mother, deep down, had been thinking the same thing. She wondered what he and Maria were doing right now and wished he were here instead.
“Yes, Simon’s a nice man.”
***
Jess was not the only one having sleepless nights. The same subject had been keeping Jade awake night after night, and despite her intrinsically forthright character, she hadn’t found the right opportunity to discuss it with her husband. Until last night.
They had a rare night off and went to dinner in Oxford, leaving the pub in the hands of barman Marius and head chef Faroukh, and Ben in the care of young Irena. Dave had noticed Jade wasn’t being her ebullient self, so he wanted to tell her about the meeting he’d had at the lawyers and put her mind at ease.
Jade was surprised to find herself in such an upmarket establishment. On the rare occasions they did get out, it was only ever to a Chinese or Indian, so the French fine dining Fleurs D’Amour was a real treat. It was so unlike Dave to be flash with the cash, but it was considerate and sensitive and she appreciated it.
She took a sip of white Burgundy and looked at him, but he seemed distracted, his eyes darting around the room, watching the waiters and waitresses the way people who work in hospitality always do when their roles are reversed.
“So, go on, tell me!” she pressed him.
“Ah, well, it was all a bit difficult. Difficult for me, anyway,” he said and she could tell he was dispirited. She reached across the table and put a hand on his.
“Aw hon, it’ll be okay. We can get through this.”
Dave gulped back his beer. He’d start on the wine next. He was driving, but he needed it, and in his head he was already celebrating.
“It’s just that I feel so responsible. I know I was stupid. I was gullible and she played me for a fool. She got what she wanted, and now look at her.”
“I never expected that of Alice. She seemed such a nice, quiet girl.”
“Yeah, well, she fooled us all then. She waited till Trish had gone out and then virtually jumped on me. She wanted babies. No doubt about that. She’s a nutcase! God knows how many times she tried that on with other blokes. She did the same to that old bloke who owned that big house she’s in. Witch.”
“That explains why she came out of nowhere. Wouldn’t say where she was from.”
“Yeah, but the worst thing was she was also a thief.”
“Yeah. You said.” Jade sat back, still reeling from the astonishing revelation about kind and gentle Alice.
“Trish comes back because she’s forgotten to take the bankings and then leaves it on the bar. So while I’m trying to explain to Trish what she’d done, the bitch grabs it and does a runner. Twelve hundred quid!”
“I know. I still can’t believe it.”
“You’d better believe it. Anyway, we had it all out. I told her to pay it back or else I’ll go the police.”
“Pay it back to Trish?”
“Nah. Back to me. It’s my money. Anyway, Trish got the pub. And, it covers us for, you know, the distress of it all.”
She smiled at him and lifted her glass.
“Is that why you’ve brought me to a posh gaffe?”
“That’s not all though.” He shook his head, put on a serious face. He looked down at his hands and she was suddenly concerned for him, worried he had something on his mind.
“Aw, hon, you can tell me.”
“Well, I know I was stupid and I let her take advantage and I never guessed it would end up like this, but the fact is, I’m the father of them two beautiful young girls.” He paused and then said quickly, “as well as a beautiful boy. And I feel a terrible responsibility towards them. Not to her, you understand? The bitch!” he spat out the words. “Nah, I wanted to do right by them. It weren’t their fault their mother’s a tart.”
“No. I’m still amazed. Alice was never like that. Even when I met her last week she seemed the same as ever. You know, quiet, unassuming, nervous even.”
“That’s the way she does it. Puts on the little girl lost look, reels you in, and wham, your life’s turned upside down forever.”
The waiter arrived with their starters and she took another sip of wine. It was having a suitably soporific effect, but it didn’t stop another rush of insecurity washing over her. She reached out a hand again.
“Aw, hon. You’ve no regrets though? About the way things turned out?”
“Course not! Course not. I just feel a bit used.”
“I understand, love. I told you, we’ll get through this. Together.”
“What would I do without you?” he said, his voice cracking for a moment, and she welled up, wanting to hug him and make it all better, but before she got the chance, he was off again.
“So, there I am, pouring my heart out, telling her that I want to do my duty for the girls as well as my own family, and she’s having none of it.” He shovelled in some paté and toast and wiped a hand over his mouth. “Says she wants nothing to do with me and neither do the girls.”
“Oh, no!”
“Yeah. Here I am, saying I’m ready and willing to pay for their upkeep, you know, maintenance. I understand my duties and responsibilities, and she just throws it back in my face. Says she doesn’t need any of my money because she’s got loads of it herself!”
“That’s outrageous. What sort of mother—”
“And on top of that, she says she never wants to see me again.”
“Aw, Dave. That’s so cruel. How could she be so cruel?”
“I dread to think how them little ’uns are going to turn out.”
Jade had been studiously extracting snails from shells while concentrating on her husband’s outpourings but she made a great show of looking aghast.
“I’d never have thought that of her.”
“No, well you ain’t heard the worst yet.”
“What?”
“Well, you won’t believe it. The bitch offers me money to go away!” Jade was still chewing but her jaw dropped open in surprise. “Can you imagine? She’s putting a price on those kiddies as if they were a commodity! Like something you can buy and sell. Bloody disgusting, that’s what that is.”
“What did you say to her?”
“Well, I was lost for words. I was so upset I didn’t know what to do with myself. I repeated my offer, said all I wanted was to do right by the kids. And then I thought of you and little Ben and how understanding you’d been, and I thought maybe we’d let bygones be bygones and say it’s all water under the bridge, and for the sake of the little ’uns we should be nice to each other and maybe have an extended family and that.”
Jade stopped eating for a moment. Stopped chewing and breathing and her heart joined in the pause. An extended family? What’s he talking about? But before she finished analysing the scenario in her head, he was off again.
“But she got angry and swore at me and threatened me, and I thought to myself, I don’t want this bitch coming anywhere near my Jade and my Ben. Fuckin’ lunatic!”
“Dead right, mate. She needs to be locked up, by the sounds of it.”
“So what do I do? I do the decent thing. I say I’ll give up the girls. I say I’ll stay away and not bother her, provided she stays away from my family. And I don’t want any of her money neither.”
“And what did she say?”
“She says she wants it all done legal, and to make sure it sticks, she’s going to pay me off.”
“Oh my God!”
The waiter cleared away their starters and Dave poured himself a glass of wine. He took a long draw, emptying half of it in one go.
“So. I says to myself, this is war. So be it. I went into bat for you and Ben, cos you’re all I care about. She gave me a figure and I refused, and I kept refusing. I drove a really hard bargain, Jade, and I beat her into submission and in the end, she gave in.” He took another swig of wine and sat back in his chair, satisfied.
She waited. Waited for the announcement, the big denouement. She held her arms out and looked at him with raised eyebrows, and when he didn’t respond, said in exasperation.
“Well? How much?”
“How much do you think?” She sighed. He’s enjoying this, the prick.
“I dunno. Tell me!”
“Fifty.” He still looked smug.
“Fifty quid?” she said shaking her head.
He leant forward and looked her straight in the eye. She took a swig.
“Fifty. Grand.”
He’d waited till she was in mid-slurp before saying it, and she almost choked on the Burgundy.
“What? Fifty grand? Oh my God, Dave. I can’t believe it!”
“Yeah well, babe, you’d better believe it. She’s paying us fifty grand. That’s for you, me and Ben. My family.”
Jade jumped up, ran around the table and flung her arms around her husband, kissing him heavily, smothering him with garlic breath, and he tried but failed to avoid spilling wine down his shirt. “All right, all right,” he said, trying to fend her off. “There’s people looking.”
“So what, Dave. We’ve got fifty grand!”
“Shh. Keep your voice down. Don’t want the whole of Oxford to know.”
“When do we get it?” she asked feverishly, unable to contain her excitement.
“As soon as we sign the docs. A couple of weeks maybe.”
“Aw Dave, I do love you,” she gushed, tears forming. “I love you for being kind and considerate and wanting to look after them little girls, and wanting to look after all of us.”
“I did it for you and Ben, doll.”
They clinked glasses and he knocked his back in one.
“Oi! Another bottle of this, mate!”