XIV
“Come on,” said Maria. “We must go.” Her words were forceful and
she was grabbing Ekes arm. Next to him, two men had lifted Bills
body and were carrying it to the van.
Eke stood. He followed and it was a good ways through the
woods to the vehicles. Everyone was silent. Maria walked next to Eke
but there were no more feelings inside of him. He was numb. Numb
to her; numb to everything.
When they finally reached the vans, they loaded Bills body into
the back of one and Eke climbed in next to the body. Maria was in the
van too, along with a couple of others. But this van was, out of
respect, given to Eke and his dead friend.
Dead. Bill. No. Eke didnt have any energy left to freak out. But he
knew it would come again, like waves– a tsunami of anger. Now, he
was numb. He was alone. His best friend, who he had talked into this
adventure, was gone. Eke was afraid to be alone. Even when Bill
made him angry, he was still his friend. Theyd been through so much
together. Now this. Now Eke was alone.
On the long trip back tocamp, Bills body got colder, stiffer, bluer.
Eke stared at nothing. They bounced along. The vans split up when
they could. They didnt want anyone looking for them.
It was so weird. The others in this group were very happy at how
the mission had gone. They only lost one man.
Only one.
It seemed to take 15 years but finally they arrived back at the
camp and immediately Eke went to get the truck. He would be taking
Bill away, back to the un-built cabin and then to the plane where he
would fly his body back to Massachusetts and look Bills mom in the
eyes.
As he was about to leave, Maria came over to him, put her hand
on Ekes arm and said, “Im sorry.” He wanted to hit her. He didnt know what he wanted to do.
“Yeah, sure,” he said.
“But thank you,” she said. “Youve helped save our country.
Thank you.” She smiled.
Eke just hopped in and drove away without looking back. He
realized then that he didnt really care about her country.
All he could think about was how angry he was at himself.
Suddenly in the middle of the road on the way to the cabin site, he
started screaming, “Arrogant fuck! Arrogant fuck!” Every mistake hed
ever made came flashing before him. They all led to this. He kept driving.
