Next day I went to the club for a game of squash. After lunch, Anna called and
asked me to go up and talk to her for a while. I told her I felt sleepy but she insisted
and I went upstairs to their apartment.
“Don't make any noise. My mother's taking her siesta,” she said and ushered
me into her room. It was a tiny room near the entrance of the flat. It contained just the
bed, a large cupboard, some shelves on the wall and a toilet-table where she kept her
makeup accessories. There was nowhere to sit and we had to lie on her bed, which
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was not even large enough. She had a dressing gown on and her slippers.
“What's the matter, Anna? What's the hurry?”
“Shhh, shush, let me shut the door. I don't want my mother to wake up and
start coming in and out.”
“I was just about to drop off to sleep.”
“So what? Is it too much to ask you to keep your auntie company?”
“I suspect it is more than company you want. You want some juicy details
about the girl I met in the States.”
She smiled.
“The juicier, the better.”
“Well, there's nothing juicy about it.”
“Don"t kid me!”
“Really. I met this girl Lisa who was a friend of a friend. For me it was love at
first sight but by the time she started to respond, I had to leave.”
“Oh dear. So you"re in love? Where does that leave you now?”
“Heaven knows. I invited her for a holiday and she promised to come. But the
more time goes by, the less likely it seems. And even if she does, what then? I forgot
to tell you, she is about seven years older than I am.”
“So if you ever marry, by the time you're fifty, she'll look more like a mother-
in-law.”
“I know you"re outspoken but now you're being awful.”
“Oh Mickey, don't get upset. Half the things I say are over the moon. You
know that. But shall we be serious for a moment?”
“Can you?”
“Sometimes,” she said smiling. “Mickey, the odds are stacked against you.
Better forget her, to be able to adapt to your new life.”
“But I love her.”
“I understand. But let me tell you, you"ll live a few months of hope and
memories and then disappointment will set in and gradually it will dawn on you that
the dream was just a dream. And Lisa a character in a romantic short story, as good as
fiction.”
“What about your Dani?”
“It's over.”
“How come?”
“Sometimes, one little absurdity suddenly changes your life without any real,
solid reason. One day, out of the blue, my mother decided that we had been going out
together long enough and it was time Dani, Jew or no Jew, made up his mind to marry
me. We were sitting outside in the hall chatting and suddenly she charges in and sits
next to us. Boy, I thought to myself, something's about to change in my life. She
looked him in the eye and said, „Listen to me my boy, I have just decided that you are
not at all a serious person and quite a bit selfish as well. You have been going out
with my daughter for over three years and probably have been sleeping with her too.
In our society, here in Egypt, this is not done. You are ruining her reputation and she
will be unable to marry when you decide to drop her. So it's one of two things. Either
you marry her or you leave her. Now!" The boy was flabbergasted. It was an
additional difficulty that I was sitting right there with them. „Yes, yes," he stammered,
„I love Anna and I want to marry her. I shall discuss the matter with my mother and
we shall come to ask for her hand." At that my mother said, „Very well, I shall be
expecting you tomorrow afternoon," and she got up and left.
“Dani looked at me and attempted to smile but could hardly manage it. A short
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while later, he excused himself and left. He never came again, with or without his
mother. He tried to call me on the telephone but I never talked to him after that. The
funny thing is, I never thought of marriage. I did not particularly want to marry Dani,
or anyone else for that matter. Yes, I was in love with him. He was not the first man I
slept with but he was experienced and he taught me everything I know about
lovemaking. He had a beautiful, circumcised penis, which I loved to uh, hmm.”
She put her index finger in her mouth.
“I forget the scientific word. I only remember, suck.”
“Anna, you're terrible. The word is fellate.”
“I only talk this way with you and Moni. So don't worry. Fellate, fellatio, yes.
Anyway, what rubbed me the wrong way was that, faced with losing me, I believe he
was sincere in his intention to bring his mother the next day to propose. But he got the
veto from mum. Probably the reason is that Jews are just as racist as us Christians.
That, I couldn't stomach. Mum's veto, that is. You see, Daniel's, that's Dani"s name,
Daniel's father is dead and his mother is a tough old bitch who controls the purse
strings of the family and keeps her darling boy on a short leash. To start with, I would
never marry the prospect of such a mother-in-law. Secondly, he showed himself weak
and a woman cannot swallow that. Had he been strong and ignored his mother and
proposed on his own the next day, I would not have accepted his proposal, but at least
we would have stayed together despite even my mother's objections.”
“And don't you see him anymore?”
“No we are no longer together. I see him now and then accidentally but the
affair is over. When a woman decides that something is over, she rarely changes her
mind.”
“And what about this Moni?”
“After I left Dani, a hundred people rushed to fill his place. Please don't think
me vain. Everybody wanted to take me out. Of course, you understand their way of
thinking. They figured I would be heartbroken, would fall for the first comer and
provide some easy sex. It was amusing the way they jockeyed and maneuvered
around me. Like vultures over carrion. Not that I didn't go out and even sleep with
one or two. Meanwhile, I was modeling for the clothing firm owned by Moni's mother
and I got to know him. He is the designer of the clothes she produces. The modéliste.
They say that domineering women tend to produce weak and sometimes abnormal
sons. Well, Moni's mother is another tough cookie and her son is homosexual. But he
is the sweetest, funniest friend I've ever had. Apart of you, that is. I started seeking
out his company and we got on so well together that we have become inseparable. In
fact, there's this stupid joke going around, that we share the men, which of course, is
absurd. And to tell you the truth, despite the fact that we have been seeing each other
for so many months now, I know very little about his sex life. I don't know if he has
any lovers or if at the moment he's going through a period of abstinence. I want you to
meet him and a further surprise is in store for you. Tomorrow evening he'll be here,
please come to meet him.”
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