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Walter connected with Anne and Dieter. Both had socialized with Hilde for some time already. Dieter studied psychology and Anne economics at the Frankfurt University. Together, the two couples went to France, where Dieter used Guide Michelin to find recommended, barely affordable restaurants. They also hiked the Alsatian mountains. In Frankfurt, it became their custom to visit each other for dinners. At some point, they formed a discussion group, along with another student who shared the apartment with Dieter and Anne. The group talked about books and topics by Karl Marx, Mikhail Bakunin, and the German philosopher Friedrich Hegel. They also used current events and comments from members of the Frankfurter School—Theodor Adorno, Max Horkheimer, and Herbert Marcuse—to analyze the political situation.
While chatting about everything that was going on in the world and their personal issues, likes, and dislikes, Walter learned that Dieter wanted to visit the USA during the approaching summer vacation.
He himself had imagined visiting America for quite some time and asked Dieter, “Would you like to travel together with me?” Dieter said yes.
The idea became reality when they purchased a reasonably priced round-trip ticket that allowed for spending time at multiple locations in different states.
Walter knew he definitely wanted to see Oklahoma City because of an invitation he had received. One of Gerhard’s American friends, Phil, who had been stationed with the military in Frankfurt, had talked a lot about Oklahoma, where he lived. He had just ended his service after four years, traveled through Europe, and eventually met Gerhard, who invited him to stay at his mother’s house for a while. When the mother found out that they smoked pot, Phil had to vacate the apartment, and Gerhard asked Hilde and Walter whether Phil could stay with them. They agreed and shared their small living room with a guest for some weeks. Dieter’s relatives had settled in Kansas City, which is why he selected that destination also.
Their final route carefully chosen, Walter and Dieter departed for a six-week vacation that correlated with Walter’s school holidays, including permission to stay some extra days. The first leg of the flight took them to New York City and then to San Francisco.
The vastness, the extent of the land, and never-ending, shimmering lights during night arrivals impressed Walter a great deal. In the city on the bay, which both of them loved, the friends lodged in a YMCA hostel. They walked through Chinatown, Haight-Ashbury, and the Fisherman’s Wharf every day in an atmosphere of awe. Something new each day elated Walter more than anything he could remember: the hippies in their loose, colorful clothing, the hairdos and jewelry they wore; never-before-seen shops with interesting utensils on sale; music and fragrances emanating from everywhere. People took time to stand still for a moment, look into each other’s eyes, and occasionally hug. Beautiful, plentiful young women who did not wear bras made Walter feel as if he were walking on clouds.
He remained in a state of persistent enjoyment, listening to local music bands he had not heard of before, such as Jefferson Airplane, Big Brother and the Holding Company, Quicksilver Messenger Service, and Grateful Dead. They visited the Fillmore, where the heavy rock band Mountain was performing that day, and also took in the musical Hair.
Dieter wanted to visit the University of California campus in Berkeley, which became famous as an originator of student revolts and the Free Speech Movement. As they walked through the enormous university grounds, on a square with fountains and people throwing Frisbees, a man suddenly appeared in front of Walter and would not let him pass by; he just stood there, looking at him in a reassuring, still way. The man had very long hair, blue eyes, and a loincloth around his waist. For a long time, Walter returned his gaze until he heard Dieter say, “Come on, let’s go.”
That night in his room at the Y, Walter could not fall asleep. He carried a few crumbs of Gerhard’s hash hidden between his German cigarettes and loaded one of them with some of the crumbs. He felt he had to get out of the room and take a walk, but there were no restaurants or bars in the neighborhood. He noticed someone standing in front of an apartment building on the other side of the street and realized it was a young black woman. She seemed to signal in his direction, and he crossed the street.
She was pretty, skinny with a lot of hair, and asked him, “Would you like to have some fun with me for forty-five dollars?”
Walter said, “Yes, of course. Where?”
She pointed above her and motioned him to follow her. They walked up three flights of stairs into an apartment, empty except for a bed and mattress in one room. She undressed and asked for the money. Walter gave it to her and then went on top of her. The girl asked him, “What is the problem? Did you take drugs? Let me go on top.”
They exchanged positions. She sat on top of Walter’s large part, riding him wildly without any success. But Walter saw her movements and expressions become more intense and articulated, and at one point, her body shivered on top of him.
Later, after crossing the street to return into his room, sleep came easily. The next day Walter did not mention anything about the incident to Dieter.
After a two-day stopover in Kansas City at Dieter relatives’ home, the young men took a plane to Oklahoma City. For some reason, Walter felt remarkably thrilled, as if he expected something special to happen. The aircraft landed around noon at the Will Rogers Airport, where Phil picked them up at the gate. Since Walter had seen Phil in Frankfurt, he had grown a beard and was wearing blue, washed-out overalls on top of a T-shirt. He looked happy to welcome the visitors. When the group left the terminal and walked to the parking lot, dry heat struck Walter breathless. As they were driving on the highway in Phil’s girlfriend Kathy bleached, light green Volkswagen Beetle with the windows open, they heard on the car radio that temperatures lingered around 104 degrees.
Walter loved it and made sure to buy a pair of overalls for himself as soon as they settled into the single-family house where Phil and Kathy lived. One night they watched the movie Woodstock for the first time. The theater packed with young people enjoying the movie, Walter thought he had arrived in heaven. After the movie, they went to a bar and had a few beers. Everywhere they went they saw people smoking weed and other stuff—at home, before the movie, during the movie, after the movie, outside the bar, and when driving home—always with caution, though, because police would materialize to enforce the law. While Walter enjoyed every second in this exotic place and said so, Dieter showed his intellectual, skeptical side, though he participated as much as he could.
The next day, Walter rode around with Phil in his blue and white pickup truck, taking care of errands. They stopped at a Baskin-Robbins, with its thirty-one flavors of ice cream, and later at a burger place. They walked into the place and ordered something to drink.
A girl started talking to Phil and then noticed Walter. She asked him, “Where are you from, man?” When he answered Germany, she cried, “Far out! Come with me.”
Out they went hand-in-hand. She said her name was Claire. Claire made Walter jump into a car, and off she drove through endless streets of greater Oklahoma City, talking nonstop. She explained that she had just stopped shooting heroin; she tried it for a while, but not for long. She had taken downers the previous day and afterward some speed. Walter did not understand half of what she said, but tried hard to get the meaning. They spent the day visiting her family, which had distant relatives in or from Germany. Finally, they ended up at Kathy and Phil’s, who had been somewhat concerned about Walter because of his sudden departure, but understood. The day ended with a home-cooked chicken dinner that Kathy provided after she returned from her job as a hospital nurse. Dieter and Walter bought a bottle of wine in the nearby liquor store. Claire stayed with Walter overnight on the living room floor. She attempted to make love, but passed out after brief foreplay.
What Walter had witnessed and experienced so far in this country filled him with a feeling of ease. He became aware of details that amazed him to the fullest, such as the terminal building windows at the Denver airport, how they slowly appeared in the shimmering, hot air, very black, and no human in sight. The size of the shopping malls with air conditioning in Oklahoma seemed like a huge indoor settlement. He imagined how it must have been living there not too long ago when the locals had to try surviving during the dust bowl; it was at the same time that Hitler gained power in Germany. He loved the new clothing store in town, the Gap, how they openly displayed the goods in self-made shelves and crates. Bell-bottom pants, blue jeans, shirts, and very colorful corduroy bell-bottoms. He spent a lot of his budget there, stocking up. Nor did he forget Hilde at home—when he walked by the leather department, he noticed a beautiful leather purse shaped like a seashell, engraved and carefully ornamented with colored leather.
It happened that Dieter, Phil, Kathy, and Walter were at the right place and the right time one night when they all headed to the Civic Center Music Hall to see the British super group Led Zeppelin. Seating approximately twenty thousand, the place was packed with lovely-looking, smiling people. It became natural that joints, reefers, and pipes were passed secretly, which established a trusting intimacy with neighbors. When the band appeared far away on a huge stage and the sound hit the crowd, everybody appeared stunned at first, but then slowly loosened up and went with it. Robert Plant and Jimmy Page with John Bonham did the crowd in. The long, long, curly hair and leather shirt with its hundreds of straps made Robert Plant look like a large bird extending its wings on stage, running and jumping until the last sound.
It continued to be hot in Oklahoma that summer. Dieter wanted to leave for New York City, and Walter was scheduled to go with him. The last weekend before leaving, they went with Phil and Kathy on a camping trip to a lake surrounded by forest, about four hours from the city. They all crammed into Kathy’s Volkswagen and made their way to the country on a freeway and then on smaller, two-lane roads. No one else appeared to be nearby; the lakeshore was densely overgrown with bushes and trees. Everybody was constantly checking for ticks; these parasites were very active that summer.
Phil had indicated that he had a surprise but did not say what it was until after their frugal meal. Then he opened his denim purse and pulled out a small leather box. When he opened it, the attentively watching companions saw a quantity of purple-blue, slightly moist-looking, midsize, round tablets.
“Organic mescaline,” he said. “Who wants to try one?”
Everybody wanted, washing it down with water. Walter was expectant because of his first encounter with a psychedelic drug. He also felt very safe. Phil had assured them the pill did not contain any chemicals. For a long time, nothing happened; he forgot about it as they smoked a couple of joints and calmed their throats with the last bottle of wine in the cooler.
All of a sudden, Walter felt sensations in the back of his neck that went down his spine and on top of his head. At the same time, he became absolutely relaxed, free of any anxiety, and peace settled into him. He lost sight of the others as he stood between some trees in a small clearing, fully aware of the sky and the stars blinking through the tree leaves. He looked down at the ground around him and noticed how the roots stuck out, the grass surrounding them colored in an intense neon green, the adjoining bushes gently rustling their leaves in the nightly breeze, which caressed and cooled him. He welcomed the refreshing quality because at the same time he felt an intense, hot energy flowing through his stomach and abdomen, spreading into his breast, arms, and legs. Blue shining colors appeared between individual plants and blades of grass. Slowly he moved along a path he had not seen before. It opened up for him to pass through the clearing and beyond, but the mossy area turned fluorescent, and he felt no need to proceed. The world as he knew it turned into a dance of energy and light, and he stood still. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he thanked existence and the energy for the first time in his life. An eternity passed, and nothing interrupted this deep communication with nature around him.
He wanted the experience to continue, but gently a shift occurred. The lights changed to a darker shade. He followed the path and reached an open space close to the water’s edge. There he lay down on the soft ground with eyes wide open and fell into the sky: millions of tiny blinking spots and constellations of densely arranged light, individual bright, single spots. Walter let them all in to be one of them.
He heard brittle branches cracking, slow steps heading toward him. Only at the last moment did he recognize Phil, who stood over him, looking down without uttering a sound. Walter got up, and they walked very gently back to their camp, where a few pieces of wood glowed between some rocks.
The friends made their way back through the dry Oklahoma heat with the car windows rolled down and did not talk much.
Dieter prepared for his departure to the Northeast. After camping out and the mescaline experience, Walter decided he did not want to fly with him to New York City. When they talked about their experiences at the lake, Dieter understood. Walter told him that the event had changed his mind about some details, independently from Dieter. “Please do not be mad at me, it has nothing to do with you. I simply want to experience being here a little longer.”
Dieter said carefully, “I am surprised, but I wish you have a great time. I will meet you later in New York for our departure to Germany.”
Walter felt he needed time to digest and, most of all, experience the place and people further. The feeling of being so comfortable around strangers was new; he had not experienced any adverse situation.
He had also met Elisabeth in the same burger joint where Claire hooked up with him. She was different, a few years younger, with a dazzling smile and not a trace of pessimism. To Walter she represented the feeling of the new movement. They spent a few nights together. Elisabeth told him she just returned from the West Coast. She had been invited to be with the Grateful Dead, helping out with whatever she could. Elisabeth explained that bands like the Dead and Jefferson Airplane traveled together and had much fun. She transmitted to Walter new levels of communication and a feeling that there was nothing to worry. Even though she was unable to have sex with him during their first meetings, he was elated to meet her. She had since left for another road trip, and he hoped to see her again before he left Oklahoma.
Walter and Phil went out to different bars and clubs together. Local bands performed blues and rock-and-roll music with authority. At home, playing all the time on the stereo, were Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young; Joni Mitchell; James Taylor; and a local duo, Brewer and Shipley, who became Walter’s favorites for a while. He met a few other women who were interested in him and went to their places, or they stayed with him in the house.
On one of these occasions, he experienced a novel situation for him. In one of the bars, Wendy appeared as a petite, bubbly personality. She was captivated by Walter and his accent. When she found out where he came from, Wendy told him that her family included relatives from Germany. Some hours later, they went to her apartment on the second floor of a two-story apartment building; Walter realized it had no window, only the air conditioner. Wendy said she was going to the bathroom, and he made himself comfortable on the bed, waiting for her return. When Wendy returned, it was as if a different person stepped out of the bathroom. She had removed her hair, a wig; the black eyelashes and long, red fingernails were gone. They started foreplay in bed, but even subsequent attempts and various forms of stimulation did not help him get hard.
Walter had long talks with Phil about writers, poets, plays, books, and politics. Born in Puerto Rico, Phil had moved with his family to New York City, where he grew up. After four years in the military, he was able to attend college in Oklahoma, where he studied social sciences and art. Walter frequently mentioned he really liked the idea of being there and wanted to return. Phil encouraged him, and a plan developed. They would save money for a year, and then Walter would return with Hilde, if she wanted to come with him. With this in mind and a heavy heart, Walter boarded the first plane on his trip back to Frankfurt.