Needed Company
Naya and Lark flew in from London two hours ago. They have to leave tomorrow afternoon because Lark has a show in London for thousands of his adoring fans. Naya and Lark took Charlie out to lunch. Blue went with them since she is now inseparable from the old man.
I sit somberly at the piano playing an Erike Satie classic piece: Gymnopédie No. 1. Its beauty is beyond my words, but my soul captures the haunted melodies as they flow effortlessly through the keys from under my fingers. My eyes are closed tight and the curtains are wide open. But the warmth of the sun that lingers on my face is not hot enough to keep me heated. I am cold, bone-chilling, numbing cold. I am in a place where warmth is not capable of reaching, where the brilliancy of beauty is leeched out. It’s as if everything went out of focus and my world slowly faded from color to somber gray and now I am at the point where the transition to black comes in. It’s solely black.
My heart.
My soul.
My mind.
Black.
Black.
Black bottomless pits of…oblivion.
I finish the piece off on a heavy note, sitting here for a while to collect my thoughts until my phone goes off.
It’s Isabel.
“You’ve made your decision?”
“Hunter,” she breathes, “I can’t.”
But you want too. I sigh disappointedly into the phone. “That’s a pity. We would’ve had endless…fun. You and I, I mean. You seemed to enjoy what I did to Ivy.”
“I can’t go behind Max’s back.” She pauses and blows out a frustrated breath. Interesting that she doesn’t deny it. “He wouldn’t understand and, if he did, he would never allow it. Besides, I’ve been talking to him about traveling. He’s too busy here to ever join me, but I told him that I would be fine by myself.”
“Where would you go?”
“I wouldn’t tell you, because you would track me down.”
A grin takes over my face. “Wise choice.”
There is silence as we listen to one another’s breathing. It’s weird but it’s us. “Hey, what are doing right now?”
“Sitting at the piano, conversing with you.”
“Smart ass.” I hear her smile in her voice. “Can you play something for me?”
Putting my phone on speaker, I place it on the polished bench next to me and play the piece over again. “That’s beautifully sad, Hunter.”
“Where are you?” I whisper, having the urge to be next to her and nowhere else.
“At my house. I could use…”
Ivy strolls over and massages my hunched shoulders. “I made brownies. Are you hungry?” I hold a finger up to my lips, giving Ivy signal to be quiet.
“What where you saying, Isabel?”
“Nothing,” by the tone of her voice I know she heard Ivy. “I should go. Bye Hunter.”
“Wait—” She hangs up before I can say anything. I grab my keys and then turn to Ivy, who is frowning at me. “I’ll be back. Save me a brownie?”
She nods, her expression disappointed and a little frustrated. She can’t be surprised that I chose Isabel. When it comes down to it, I’ll always choose Isabel.
Isabel’s unfinished sentence replays over in my mind as I start the engine.
I could use company…
Her car is still there when I arrive and the door is unlocked. “Isabel?” There’s a loud clink and a ruffling sound.
“In the bathroom, Hunter. Give me a minute.”
My heart squeezes in my chest as I approach the closed door. I jiggle the knob. It’s locked. “Isabel, let me in.”
“I’ll be done in a second.” The wavering in her voice gives her away. She can never deceive me. There’s that sound again, the sound of shards of glass being frantically shuffled around a hard surface.
Pressing my forehead to the door, I suppress the impulse to yell at her and to burst the damn thing down. I grit my teeth and say, “Let me, Isabel. I know. It’s okay. Just let me in.” The shuffling abruptly stops and I hear her inhale a sharp breath. “Please, baby.” There’s a long pause and then the door unlocks and swings open. I work my jaw as I stare at her. It’s the only thing I can do to not lose my mind.
“Don’t tell Max,” she whispers as if she was a child caught doing something bad. I give my head a slight nod, staring at the scrap of tissue she presses to her left wrist. The thin white paper is slowly soaked with red. I swat her hand away and she winces as I apply more presser on the bleeding wound. Glancing around, I notice the mirror to the medicine cabinet is broken and splintered into a perfect halo. Shards of fragmented glass twinkle as they rest in the sink and scarlet is smeared all over the white marble. Bloody fingerprints mark the walls and the roll of tissue paper. It’s a like a horror movie in here.
Sitting her on the closed toilet lid, I search for the cabinet for disinfectants and something to cover her cut with. I apply an antiseptic dressing and wrap it tightly, then I clean the blood off and wipe everything down with bleach the best I can. I am thorough, though. The bathroom is spotless, but my white T-shirt is covered in her blood.
“You could kill someone and get away with it.”
I glance at her, barely contained anger emitting off me. “How can you joke at a time like this?”
She lets her eyes fall. “Sorry,” she whispers halfheartedly.
Meticulously scrubbing my hands in foamy soap, I wash, rinse and repeat. A sickening illness washes over me as I acknowledge Isabel’s blood stained my hands and clothes. It’s wrong and makes me feel like dirt shit, which I’m trying to avoid. I’ve put her through enough. I do not need her blood on my hands…or clothes.
Only when Isabel presses her chest into my back and circles her arms around my waist do I realize the mirror is fogged and steam drifting up from the scolding water. My hands are red and shaking. Turning the faucet off, I brace myself on edge of the marble sink and squeeze until the bones in my fingers pop and threaten to break.
“Hunter…Hunter please stop.” Her frantic plea and terrified voice is lost in the distance. The pounding of my heart is louder. My mind is adrift in the gruesome past of my persistent misery that never fails to appear from the shadows to creep up on me to deliver a fatal blow.
Small fingers painfully grip my groin, trying to snatch it from my body. Growling, my hand locks around Isabel’s wrist and I squeeze until she winces and lets go. “You’re hurting me, Hunter.”
I immediately release the fragile wrist, turning to face her. “What the fuck was that about?”
She holds my gaze for the longest moment before she stares at her shoes, giving off the impression of a sheepish school girl that I wouldn’t mind spanking. “I’m sorry, but that was the only way I could get your attention.”
To my surprise, I burst into laughter. She looks up at me with a confused gleam in her eyes and a suppressed grin. “Why are you laughing?”
“Because only you would try to castrate me to get my attention.” My laughter dies as my eyes dart to the bandage. “You can’t do that anymore.” My stern tone is harsh to my own ears.
“I know,” she whispers, hiding her wrist behind her back. “Thanks. You didn’t have to take care of me.”
“I love taking care of you.” The confession slips from my lips without permission, not that I mind though. “I’ll always take care of you, if you give me a chance.”
Her hazel-green eyes are wide and she visibly swallows hard, avoiding my gaze. “I love Max.”
“You love me more,” I murmur, stepping close enough to say it in her ear. She doesn’t respond to the challenge in my voice. She shudders, taking an unsteady step back. “Where are your keys?”
“In my bag.”
Working my jaw, I take pleasure in watching her squirm. “Give them to me. Now.”
Her brows snap together. “Why?”
“Don’t you trust me?” I say through a mocking smile. “No questions. Just hand me your keys.”
She takes a deep breath, then nods. I watch her leave the bathroom and then shortly returns with a set of keys on a crystal heart chain she dumps in my waiting palm while sulking. “You’re spending the day running errands with me. But first, I have to fix your mirror.”