Barry got off the bus.
The mountain air was cold and damp, but the clouds were starting to clear.
Barry ignored the sign pointing to Hope and continued instead towards the lake.
After walking a few minutes longer, the dirt road lead downhill and he caught sight of the two houses. The sun was glistening on the water and in the distance he could see the mountains that seemed to reach the sky.
He undid his coat and checked the bandages which were the reason for his leave in the first place, one last time. He made sure they were completely out of sight because the last thing he wanted his mom to see was why he was on leave in the first place. Once he was satisfied that nothing was showing, he walked off the road and across the green lawn.
When the front door opened his mother stepped out.
She was as beautiful as ever.
She was wearing a plain black dress with a dark coloured handkerchief on her head, and as soon as she realized it was him she ran towards him.
“DELMORE!” she shouted.
Stretching her arms out she grabbed onto him, hugging him tightly.
“Mom”
She buried herself in his chest.
He was as tall as a mountain compared to her so much that when they hugged, she practically disappeared.
“Delmore” she said again.
“Tons of love eh mom? I haven’t been away a whole year or anything like that. Let’s get inside, come on”
When she finally got around to taking her face out of his chest though, she was crying.
Did she notice I was wounded or was she just thrilled to see me?
Despite not being certain, Delmore thought it best to baically concentrate on not giving himself away.
“Oh mom, come on... I wasn’t away that long”
“Your shoulders are wider, and you’ve got skinnier. Your face is hollow honey,” she said caressing his cheeks.
“Do they feed you in that God forgotten country?”
“Yes, mom”
“Just look at you, you’re flesh and bones, almost straight edged. You used to be so big but you’re almost scary looking now”
“Mom!”
“It's true. Your shoulders are even broader than before”
“Let's get inside, come on”
They went inside.
She lived in a white wooden house somewhat colonial in style.
His mom put a teapot on the burner.
“So Delmore, honey... When are you coming home? Are not you bored of the army and that God forsaken Vietnam yet?”
“How many times do I have to tell you, mom? I love my job”
“Don't talk nonsense. So why don't you ever talk about your job when you write me then?”
Barry narrowed his eyes, but then quickly let up as he turned to look through the window down at the lake. That was his mom.
How could she possibly understand?
No one could and no one ever would either.
That was something Delmore would take to his grave exactly like the rest of them.
“I can't talk about my job mom”
“Oh come on, there is not anything a son can’t talk to his mother about. There is not a mother around that wouldn’t give her life up for her children!”
“Seriously mom I can't talk about it. I took an oath. Anyway, it's no big deal. It's basically the same as what everyone else does over there, more or less. I mean the usual stuff. The thing is though that they made me take an oath, and if I ever broke it, I wouldn’t be able to look at myself in the mirror again mom. Honestly, that’s all”
That was the truth.
He’d never talked to anyone about his work before but sometimes it felt like he was going crazy because of it.
On more than one occasion, mostly when he’d had too much to drink, he toyed with the idea of telling someone something and maybe just changing the names or something like that to be on the safe side.
He tried to push the thought aside though and change the subject.
“How's dad'?”
“Always worse son”
“In what sense?”
“Well, even though we haven’t really spoken since the separation, I think your father’s an alcoholic now or maybe even worse and I think he may be seeing some bad women again too”
He didn’t know what to say.
Looking at him even more closely she then added:
“You’re not going out with any bad women over there in Vietnam, are you?”
“Oh my God no!”
“They’re full of diseases, you know that right? You’re such a good-looking boy you don't need to pay them Barry. A guy like you can have any girl he wants; they’re all at your feet. You know that, don't you?”
She moved her hand to his cheek caressing it.
“You are such a handsome boy, Delmore. You’re your mother's pride”
***
That evening Cindy stopped in at the Delmore’s, and the rest of the family left her and Barry alone.
The two of them sat side-by-side on the white, wooden rocking chair facing the lake.
The air was cold, so they wrapped themselves up in a blanket to keep warm and Cindy gently laid her head down on his shoulder.
He turned her face slowly toward his caressing it meanwhile, and then kissed her.
They kissed slowly and at length under the cosy warmth of the blanket.
Bearing in mind his time at Fort Bragg, the tour in Vietnam, getting injured and a thousand other things, although they’d finally come to this, Delmore had waited a whole year for that kiss. In his head it had felt even longer, more like a lifetime and now that the moment was finally upon them all he wanted to do was stay under that blanket till the end of time.