CHAPTER 16
RELAPSE
I have been staying with Jeffery for the past 2 months in his house. I always make sure to call back home as regular as possible. With the money I am earning from the drug business I have being able to pay for my younger sister university fees in full and also sending home groceries. I feel a certain sense of entitlement I can provide for my family. Jeffery has given me the chance to go it alone in the drug industry. I made some contacts, and I will be moving out soon, I have decided to stay in Hilbrow where I will be closer to my clients. I will be selling merchandise from Jeffery and I will pocket 35% and the rest Jeffery will take. I don’t care what they say about Hilbrow even if it has one of the highest murder rates in Johannesburg I am going what only matters is that I have my money at the end of the day. The day has come I move into my flat in Hilbrow. From my flat I can see the iconic Vodacom tower. I am sitting in front of television in the evening and I am watching the news. My heart stops for a moment when the news anchor opens up his mouth on the news bulletin, “A gun struggle insured between a suspected drug lord and the police resulting in the death of four officers and the drug lord.” What made my heart stop was the fact that the drug lord in question was Jeffery. There couldn’t show the gruesome pictures of his dead body which had been drilled all over by bullets because it was prime time news. My bad luck was back again when I thought I was making it, I was back to square one. My supplier is dead where am I going to find the merchandise. I sit there looking more like a zombie I feel like I am cursed and never meant to be happy. Maybe I can try the gaudium I have, what have I to loss. I take a paper and place it on a table. On top of the paper I put a few of the whitey stuff. I take a pen barrel and I start snorting it. After half an hour I start to feel like I have been teleported to a whole new galaxy I can feel my head feeling a bit funny. It’s like I am working in suspended air the feeling is unexplainable. Maybe it was a bit inhumane worrying where I would find my supplies instead of feeling sorrow on the death of Jeffery. The more gaudium I take the more I feel empowered. I feel ecstasy and every little worry I have is put to rest. For a moment I pause to think and I come to the conclusion that if I smoke drugs every day I am always going to feel ecstasy. Finally I have found my panacea to my problem of ever longing for happiness. The air around me is calm and serene and all I can hear the little vibrations playing in my head. Jeffery warned me never to cross the line between using and selling and I have crossed it and I am loving it. I lay on the sofa, with the television set on. Weeks pass by after Jeffery’s death and I have become a drugie. I am now a full time drug addict I can’t go a day without snorting coke. The police search at Jeffery’s warehouse yields nothing, prior to the shootout with the police Jeffery had moved all the merchandise to a safe house in Mozambique. He also had the lab removed and all the apparatus in it were incinerated. As for Itai he left for Bermuda were he opened up his laboratory from the money he had earned whilst working for Jeffery. He also took his two assistances. From what I heard he is no longer manufacturing any of the magic powder on any narcotics. He is pulling all his resources in research in other more moral places. The state tries all legal routes but it can’t confiscate any of Jeffery’s South African properties or freeze any of his cash in South African banks because of insufficient evidence to link Jeffery to any illegal drug trading. I have become a shadow of myself I remain indoors always have the windows closed, the darkness just makes it more intimate for me. I have reached a point where I have sold the car I had to sustain my drug addiction. I no longer pay my rentals in time I always have a lame excuse for the landlady. I can see it in her eyes one more, late rental payment and she will throw me out. Months have gone by since I last called home or sent money. I have put all of my family member’s numbers on blacklist. None of their calls can get through. I don’t need to hear their constant calls and ever un-wearing message to send them some money, I know they fed me when I was young but that was back then, they shouldn’t expect me to fend for them. I am my own man and that’s the way I want it to be. I am slowly running out of things to sell and the flat has become a replica of an empty and deserted area. Its two weeks after month end but I haven’t paid any rent, I hear the knock on my door as I open the door my landlady a ball like looking lady because of her short height and chubby looking structure. My landlady Ms Wilmese a coloured lady starts shouting all sorts of obscenities. I stand there just like a zombie. Beside her are two beefy looking guys. At her accord the two guys come in the house and carry me and throw me out. As I lay in the corridor a satchel hits my face. It’s the satchel I keep my documents. Ms Wilmese takes my stove, blankets and a few clothes I have remaining as compensation for the outstanding rentals. I walk out of the flat a broke guy, I am also in need of a fix. The only things I have worth selling is my mobile phone and the jacket I am wearing. I sell the jacket I have for a few hundred rands at a pawn shop. The money is all channelled out at buying some drugs. I go to my usually place where I buy the merchandise. It’s a small dingy room in Hilbrow where the exchange is been made, Just as I am about to get the package. Two gun wielding guys enter the room and open fire. As I am standing near the window I jump out of the window and land awkwardly on my legs. The jump is an agonising fall from the second floor. I stand up to my feet and run down an alley after which I reach a brick wall which I climb over. I finally stop after I know I am safe and that’s when I realise I have been grazed by a bullet on my right hand. With my satchel strapped to my back I start shacking and sweating I need a quick fix but where can I get. It’s fast approaching night and I am feeling cold I have sold my jacket. I take some cardboard boxes and some newspapers and make my bed in a small alley on the outer margins of Hilbrow. I am soon asleep but once I am awake the urgency to take drugs comes back again. I am sweating and trembling and my head is aching. The only thing of real monetary value left on me is my mobile phone and it has no airtime left in it.