Why I killed myself by Anne Adefesobi - HTML preview

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Chapter six

 

I had a friend during my pre-degree days whose name was Catalina. She failed jamb and I told Mom about it with the warning that she mustn't tell Dad about it. She said she promised but she broke it.

On that Saturday evening, I was sitting on the couch in the sitting room, going through my news feed on Facebook when dad came out of his room and started smiling at me.

I hated that smile. It always annoyed me. To me it wasn't a genuine smile but a smile fool of a mockery. I looked up at him and looked away instantly. I wasn't ready for one of his stupid talks.

"Joan is it true that one of the friends during your pre-degree program failed jamb?" He asked with that annoying smile still plastered on his face

"I don't know" I answered him sharply

Why was he always happy at someone else's downfall? Catalina failure really hurt me for weeks before I finally moved on. There was nothing I could do to reverse what happened.

His face dropped the annoying smile immediately he heard my answer and he angrily went back to his room. I picked up my phone which I had dropped by my side and continued with my news feed.

He came back two minutes later and shouted "I'm I the one you're talking to like that?" I gave him no reply and continued with my news feed. Three minutes later, he came out again and shouted "I'm I the one you're talking to like that?" I gave him no reply again but continued with my news feed. One minute later, he came out again and thundered

"I'm I the one you're talking to like that!"

He started rushing at me and I was sure that I wasn't going to get out if his reach on time. So, I did what I knew was best for me. I hid my phone inside the chair and waited peacefully for his beating.

He started hitting me all over the body but my legs took must of the beating. Everyone was already in the sitting room, watching everything that was happening in front of them. It wasn't something anyone of us feared any longer, it's just something that happened at least twice a week.

When I realized that the beating was not going to stop anytime soon, I did what I knew I'd to do. I pushed him away and ran toward the kitchen. I was half way through the kitchen when my legs stopped functioning and the next thing I knew was that I was facedown on the kitchen floor and I was trying everything I could to get back up.

He was on me in seconds and already started hitting me again. I wanted to protect myself but my legs were just not working. Few minutes later, he got up and went to the kitchen slab, he picked up a stock pot which was filled with water soaked beans that we planned to use for supper and poured everything on me.

My nostrils, my eyes, my mouth and even my ears were filled with both beans and water. And the next thing I saw was that he raised the stock pot high in the air and I closed my eyes because I knew that for sure, it was over.

I opened my eyes when I felt nothing and saw mom struggling with him. I took the opportunity  and ran for my life.

He left mom with the pot and followed me instantly but I was no longer seven. So I made sure to run as fast as I could until he was unable to reach me.

I later went back home and whispered to my sisters through the window. They told me he was in his room and that I should come inside our room to see what he did.

I got to the room and saw my makeup kit, the one my school sister gave me all smashed and broken. I covered my mouth and ran to it. I loved the makeup kit. It had almost everything I wanted- lipsticks, foundations, powders- and he broke it.

I heard his footsteps and rushed out of the house instantly. I wasn't going to give him a second chance. I hid at a neighboring building and saw him passed by. I suspected he was trying to track me down and that made me laugh even though I was crying.

I went back home when I was sure that he was far away from home and locked all doors should in case he came home early.

I packed the broken makeup kit and dropped it on his side locker in his room. There was nothing I could do with it anymore. He destroyed it hundred percent.

As I'd suspected, he came back home early and saw me through the window. He started rushing to the house and hit his head on the door. I laughed quietly and stayed rooted to where I was.

"Juliana. Julliet come and open this door! Juliana come and open this door!" He started shouting with the hope that he was going to reach me on time.

I got out of the house and ran as far as I could. I wasn't going to take chances.

Around ten that night, one of my neighbors told me to follow him in order for him to plead on my behalf. I followed him as he told me to but made sure to stay away from him should in case I'd to escape. Dad screamed NO to his face and started running after me. I ran as fast as I could in the darkness and ran until he wouldn't be able to catch me. That night, I slept outside. On the street.

Less down two weeks later, I and mom got home and met mom sewing machine destroyed. Juliana and julliet were the ones at home. So, Juliana went into full details of what, why and when he destroyed the machine. And unfortunately for her, dad was loitering around.

He rushed at her as soon as he had the chance and hit her head on the wall before dragging her to the sitting room.

I was hundred percent sure that he was fully ready to strike before showing up because one of his twisted wires was in his hand.

After making sure that almost every part of her had been touched with the wire, he left her on the floor and went outside. He came back later with a very big Stone and forced her to carry it. She obeyed but bailed as soon as she had an opportunity. He ran after her and I ran after him praying with everything I had that he must not meet up with her.

Juliana wasn't as strong as I was when it came to running and instead ran into an opened house she came across, locking the door instantly. Dad rushed at her but he was too late. He started knocking on the door aggressively and the lady of the house came out.

"Yes. How may I help you?"

"A girl ran inside your house now. Let her out" dad screamed

"And does that give you the right to knock on my door that way?"

"Let the girl out!" He screamed spitting saliva

"I'm gonna have you arrested if you knock on my door again" she said and smacked the door on his face.