CHAPTER 8 - STAYING ACCOUNTABLE
Imagine announcing to thousands of people every time you ate something, including what you were eating and how much. What do you think would happen to your diet?
That’s exactly what my blogger friend decided to do this year. Mona has been frustrated with her slow but steady weight gain over the past 5 years and she decided to do something about it. This was going to be the year that she got back to her healthy weight.
Mona had tried a couple diets and fitness plans over the years but she self-admittedly had trouble with staying motivated. For a couple weeks things would be great, but a slip-up here and there would quickly send her plans into a downward spiral. This time she was going to take a very different approach.
She wrote a blog post outlining her fitness goal for the year – “I am going to lose 70lbs!”
That was a turning point. In telling her readers exactly what she was planning to accomplish, Mona had created an accountability group for herself. She now had thousands of readers who would be asking about her progress on pretty much a daily basis. Choosing to give up would not only be disappointing herself, but also all those followers who would be tracking with her.
Mona lost 70lbs in just more than 10 months.
Ask her if it was easy and the answer will be a point blank “No way”, but she was able to do it. Mona will tell of bumps along the way (fighting food cravings, skipping exercise, poor eating choices while travelling, etc.) but she will also say that quitting was not an option.
I wanted to lose the weight for myself, but I also wanted to do it for everyone who was following along with me. I knew several people who had set similar goals after reading about mine – I didn’t want to let them down.
So maybe you don’t have thousands of people reading your blog posts each week. That’s okay – You do have people in your life who will happily be your accountability partners.
Telling even a couple people about your goals and how you intend to reach those goals will be the difference between a short-lived health kick and a long-term lifestyle restructuring. Here’s how to get started:
#1. Pick 2 Accountability Buddies – I always recommend having at least 2 people on your team. Ideally these will be people who you talk with on a daily or at least a weekly basis (i.e. phone, text message, Facebook, email, etc.)
Choose these people wisely. As we discussed in Chapter 5, some people will actually try to sabotage your fitness plans. You obviously don’t want these people acting as your accountability buddies.
Who in your life would genuinely want to see you succeed?
Who would get real happiness in seeing you lose weight and adopt a healthier lifestyle?
#2. Be Specific With Your Plans – Telling your buddies that you “want to lose weight” isn’t all that helpful. That’s a very ambiguous goal that will be tough for them to follow up on.
Instead, try to be as specific as possible in terms of your goal AND your plans on how you will get there.
For example, you could say something like this:
I have a wedding to attend on May 10th and I really want to feel good about how I look that day. My goal is to lose 15lbs by then.
To accomplish that goal I will go to the gym 3 times per week and will walk for 30 minutes on days I don’t go to the gym.
I’ll also keep a food journal that shows everything I eat. I want to use this food journal to help me eliminate the snacks I eat every night before I go to bed.
Notice how specific the goal is and how actionable the plans are. This makes it much easier for your accountability buddies to follow up with your progress. They can easily ask questions about your exercise, your food journal, your progress in cutting out nighttime snacks, and how close you are to achieving your weight-loss goal.
#3. Be Specific In Your Request – It can be uncomfortable for buddies to ask about your weight-loss. The topic of “weight” is personal and oftentimes people will be afraid to offend, so they choose to avoid the topic altogether.
That’s why you need to be very specific in what you’re asking your buddies to do. Here’s a good example:
Can we have a 10-minute phone conversation every Wednesday at noon? I would like you to call me and ask me if I did my exercise for that week.
I’ll send you a copy of my food journal via email on Tuesday so that you can see what I’ve been eating. If you see nighttime snacks in there (and yes, I’ll be honest in my food journal!) then let’s talk about it on Wednesday. I know snacking is a weakness of mine so I would really appreciate you keeping me accountable to my plan.
There is real accountability in that request. Think about how motivating it could be to have a friend call you each week to chat about your progress.
Think about how supportive it would feel to have someone willing to chat about your ups and downs and how you can improve from week to week.
Having a caring and dedicated accountability team is crucial for your success. Very few people accomplish long-term weight-loss if they try to do it based solely on their own willpower. We all need the help of others.
In the weight-loss groups I run, we check in with each other every single day. Participants are required to report to their groups with 4 pieces of information:
22. Did you drink your required water for the day?
23. Did you get your planned exercise done?
24. Did you eat according to your plan?
25. If anything fell off-track, how will you fix it tomorrow?
You don’t have to ask your own accountability buddies for daily check-ins, BUT the more frequently you check in, the more accountability you will be creating. I recommend scheduling your check-ins at least once per week.
You might find that check-ins are really “official” at first but then lose focus over time. It’s easy to turn your check-ins into chitchat with your accountability buddies. Don’t let this happen!
That’s why participants in “10 in 4” have those 4 questions to answer each day. They know exactly what is required and then they can chat about whatever they want after they’ve met their check-in requirements.
When establishing your check-in appointments, be sure to have an agenda. If your accountability buddy is going to ask you about your exercise, be prepared to tell him or her specifically what happened that day/week AND how you are going to fix any bumps that may have occurred along the way.
The same goes for eating. It’s easy to say, “my diet was okay this week but I’ll try harder next week.”
A vague conversation like this is NOT helpful. Be prepared to talk about specifics with your buddies.
If you’re not sure what those specifics should look like, don’t worry. In the upcoming chapters we are going to be covering all of the exact elements I teach participants in the “10 in 4” groups. You can follow these exact guidelines to establish your own check-in agenda.
26. Who are your accountability buddies going to be?
27. How and when will you check in with them?
28. What are some items that you know you need to be accountable for? (e.g. exercise, eating healthy meals, avoiding certain foods, etc.)