Right before I got out of the army an old friend Alan called me and told me that he had gotten married and had moved to Chicago where he was now making big money as a Pepsi delivery driver. He told me that as soon as I got out he wanted to see me so how about coming out?
I told him that I was now married too and just couldn't afford it.
He said "No sweat man, if you can pay your way here then I’ll be happy to pay your way back."
I told him that I’d talk it over with Lindsey. Lindsey who was working as a file clerk for slave wages at the time and hated it said, "Why not?" so I called Alan back and told him we'd see him in about a month.
He said, "Great!" A month later I called Alan and asked if we were still on. He said, "Come on down." so we flew to Chi-town.
Alan and Lois meet Lindsey and me at O'Hare. Alan acted real glad to see us but Lois was reserve, which was understandable seeing as she had never met us before and she was real pregnant. We congratulated her and Alan on her condition then walked to their car, a new Chevy Malibu. On the drive Alan tells us that he was making well over a thousand dollars a week, sometimes as much as $1500 selling Pepsi’s but he said that in the winter it would drop to only around $500 or less a week. Wow, we were impressed because this was big money (1968). When we got to their house Alan says, "How do ya like the new house we just bought? It's small, only two bedrooms, but it's all ours." Again we congratulated Alan on his good fortune.
Lindsey, Alan and me partied, smoking dope and drinking booze until midnight then Alan tells us that he had to get up at 5 a.m. to go to work so good night and goes to bed. Lois had gone to bed hours before. Lindsey and I sleep on the living room floor because the other bedroom was for the new baby went it got here. Next morning Alan wakes us and tells us he would be home by 5 p.m. so we can just hang out for the day. We go back to sleep. Around 10 Lois gets up so we do too. She tells us she’s spending the day with her mother and should be home by 4 p.m. and to make ourselves at home then she leaves. Lindsey and I do just that, hanging out smoking grass, screwing and watching the tube.
At 4 p.m. Lois comes home and starts dinner. We tell her we'd be happy to cook but she says, that's okay, we're guests. Alan comes home a little after 5 p.m. We have supper then we brake out the weed while he get the booze and we again party till midnight. Lois spends the evening in her bedroom. During the evening Alan says, "You know what? You guys should move here. You could stay with us until you found a place of your own and jobs. In fact, I know of a job that starts at $15,000 a year that you both could apply for."
Being buzzed I say, "That sounds good to me. Where's the job and what is it."
Alan tells me, "It's as a drug chemist for Abbots Laboratories."
I laugh and say, "Yeah, like they're going to hire me."
But Alan says, "Yeah man, they will if you pass their test. They're looking for high school graduates who they can train themselves."
We talk about it a bit more. I say I'll think about it then go onto other subjects.
Next morning after Lindsey and I get up we decide that yesterday was a little boring so we drop some LSD and by the time that Lois gets up we are flying high. Lois doesn't say much to us then around noon says she's going to her mother's and leaves. Lindsey and I spend the day trippin’. Again Lois comes home just before Alan and makes supper. When Alan comes home he asks if we went to Abbots and we tell him that we forgot. Alan says that since tomorrow’s Friday to make sure that we go tomorrow. We promise we will so now let's party.
Next day I ask Lindsey if she wants to go to Abbots and check out the job situation. She just shrugs and says, "I don't care, whatever you want is all right with me."
So I say, "Well, we mise well check it out." and down to Abbots we go.
They gave us two tests, one for dexterity and one written that's a lot of math. The personal director calls Lindsey in and tells her that she scored high on the dexterity test but not high enough on the written so he can off her a job on the assembly line that starts at $12,000 a year with full benefits in three months.
Then he calls me in and tells me that he wants me to take another test, which I do. He calls me in again and tells me he can offer me the chemist program. He says it's like a four year university course in three years and after I finish I would have the equivalent of a bachelors degree in chemistry. That the job starts at $15,000 a year with full benefits and a $5,000 a year raise each year and a $5,000 raise on the completion of the program. He tells me, "You could be making $30,000 a year in just three years. And if you keep up your studies, you could be making $60,000 a year in less that ten years. Well, what do you think about it?"
I say, "Wow, that's a lot of money. I will think about it and let you know on Monday."
He says, "All right, but I don't want to kid you, it'll be a lot of hard work but I doubt seriously if you'll ever get another opportunity like this. Call me Monday."
We shake hands and I leave.
I tell Lindsey all about it on the bus ride back to Alan and Lois’s. Lindsey is quiet so I ask what she thought. She said, "Tai, I really don't think I want to live in Chicago, but if you really wanted to then it'd be all right with me, after all I've come this far with you and I love you."
I hug Lindsey hard, tell her I loved her too and was very happy that we were married.
We got back to the house and Lois was there but when we come in she goes into her bedroom, which we just chalked up to her being pregnant. Alan comes home and I tell him all about Abbots. He asks if we were taking the jobs and I tell him that I was seriously thinking about it. He says, "Good. Let's celebrate." We partied the night away. Alan tells us that he has to work on Saturday but would be off all day Sunday and we'll all do something together then told us that we were welcome there until we found our own place. We thank him then we all go to bed.
Next morning bright and early we hear Lois leave so we go back to sleep. About an hour later this older woman walked in and says to us, "Okay get up, get your things together and get out!"
We look at her then I ask, who the hell does she think she is?
She says, "I am Lois’s Mother and she's told me all about you and you're filthy ways. My daughter is pregnant and we are not going to put this baby at risk by having you two dirty dope addicts here perverting Alan."
I remind her that it was Alan who asked us here.
But she says, "I don't care if God ask you here. I am telling you to get out, NOW!"
I say, “Does Alan know you're doing this.”
She says, "Alan doesn't know his ass from a hole in the ground. Now, either you leave or I am calling the police and turning you in."
I try to reason with her saying that we have almost no money, that we don't know anyone here or where to go, but she tells us, "I don't care what you do as long as you get out of here in the next 15 minutes."
I ask if she’ll give us a ride into the city?
She says, "I am not going to do anything except call the police. Now are you leaving or do I call the cops."
I say that we'll leave.
Lindsey and I get up, pack up and get out with mother glaring at us the entire time. We get a bus down town. Lindsey asks me, "Now what?"
I tell her that we've got 50 bucks and that should last us until Alan buys us a return ticket to San Francisco.
We get a cheap hotel. In the evening I call Alan. He answers and says how sorry he is that all this happened, that he knew Lois didn't like us there but he just thought it was her being pregnant, and we were having such a good time together.
I say, that's nice, we understand but now what about that return ticket.
Alan's real quiet so I ask again, then he says "I’m really sorry man, but I just can't afford it right now with the house and the car and the insurance payments, and with Lois's doctor bills, we're pretty broke right now."
Now I'm pissed and do not understand even one little bit and say, "What the hell do you mean broke, you showed me your pay stub for last week and you cleared almost a thousand dollars. What kind of crap is this! You promised to pay our way back."
He says, "Sorry man, but I just can't do it."
I say, "And what are we suppose to do? We have less that $40, and that won't last long."
He says, "Sorry, I just can't swing it right now."
I say, "You ain't broke, you are pussy whipped!"
Now Alan gets a little hot telling me, "No I'm not. I am not pussy whipped!"
I say, "Then honor your promise to us and buy us the ticket back." Alan's not saying anything so I yell into the phone, "You chickenshit pussywhipped motherfucker! You know I'm going to tell everyone we know about this, and no one will ever believe another word you say again. You pussywhipped cocksucker!" Then I slam the phone down. Lindsey just looks at me and says, "Now what?" I look back at her, calm myself down then tell her, "Well, I guess that we are hitch hiking back to the City."
Lindsey kisses me then says, "Great! I told you I didn't want to live in Chicago anyway.” We make love then go to sleep.
Next morning we hit the road and once we got out of the city we get lucky, a salesman picks us up going to St. Louis, he even let us sleep on the floor of his motel room that night. The next day we make Denver and spend the night with some college kids in a fraternity house. The next we are in Salt Lake staying with a Mormon family who has given us a ride. Then next day we make Reno where we have to spend the last of our money on a cheap hotel and by the next day we are back in the City vowing never to leave the bay area again. We stay with some friends for a few days until we moved into our first commune. What a trip! Looking back on it I can see that Lois actually did me a huge favor. Not only did it help me to once and for all choose the hip life but it also brought Lindsey and me much closer together because if we had stayed and I had taken that job then what would have my life been like. Thank God I will never know.