Fun fact: If you
take away the dash between 20 and 05, you get 2005-2016. And if you
count from 2005 up to this year, that’s 11 years - half of the
years I’ve lived.
I like making random observations like the one above. So much so that I could almost call it an interest of mine. There’s something about observing and discovering the most random things that brings me satisfaction, if a relatively small amount of it.
Maybe that somehow ties into my attention to detail. I don’t draw very often, but when I do, I tend to draw fairly elaborate illustrations with many small details. I’m a very observant type of person, and I tend to notice small details a lot. If someone shivers ever so slightly or glances at me quickly enough that they think I didn’t notice, I tend to notice that.
I also tend to notice changes in people’s moods and behaviors. If someone’s even a little less happy than usual or behaves differently, I tend to notice that. But sometimes, I have to second-think my judgment. My mother often asks me what’s gotten me down when there’s in fact nothing that’s gotten me down. Often in those instances, I’ve only been contemplating different things. That’s why I often second-think if certain people are actually down or not.
When I’m truly down, I show it as clearly as my emotional skills allow me to. I make it clear that I don’t want to see or talk to anyone. I make it clear that I want to be left alone to vent. I make it clear that you don’t want to approach me, no matter how much you think your mere presence will make me feel better.
As far as the spectrum of “calm vs. angry” is concerned, I’m a prime example of both of its ends. Most of the time, I’m incredibly calm to the point that almost nothing can set my fuse off. But when something does set my fuse off, it burns really damn quickly. I can even get downright violent.
And when I get that angry...
Even the dumbest idiot will be wise enough to keep their distance.