state of fight or flight.
-Extreme regret at not having been able to somehow ward off
or severely harm the attacker/s.
-Self-hatred, pity; feeling dirty and used (most likely
immediately following the rape).
-STDs,
vaginal
and/or
anal
ruptures;
psychosomatic
illnesses.
-Increased susceptibility to medical and/or mental illness.
-Having to tell family and friends; or keeping the rape a secret.
-Possible pregnancy
-A generalized hatred, fear, distrust of males, may include
male relatives also.
Years ago I knew a white woman who was raped by a man when she was a pre-pubescent. The damage to her vagina and insides was so great she was unable to ever have children.
This woman was white, the attacker was black. In addition to her physical trauma she had an extreme fear of all black males in spite of the attacker being only one person and certainly representing no race or either gender. Rapes can leave a deep and long-lasting imprint on a victim.
-The victim may become numb or repulsed by sex.
-Social, interpersonal and work functions may be adversely affected.
66
Years ago there was an unusual case involving a convenience
store clerk who was brutally raped while on duty. Unfortunately for this woman she had to return to work the very next day to pay off her bills. Worse yet, she was raped again by the same person.
Rape is on the rise in North America. In addition,
recognition identification and reporting of this heinous crime is also on the rise.
After a rape a victim undergoes immense physical and
psychological pain. In addition, the time immediately after a rape is important:
-Your personal safety and security is number one!
-If you were raped by a stranger in unfamiliar surroundings
and left after the rape, the rapists may return for some more.
-You need immediate medical care regardless of how you
feel. Rape can sometimes make a victim numb. You may have serious medical injuries that need to be treated immediately
-Call the police or someone who can adequately protect you from further harm (family or friends, etc).
-You’re understandably fearful and anxious about having a physical examination; strangers gawking at you, yet another person touching you and your private parts. There are many men in hospitals and clinics.
-During the examination you have the right to say stop at any time.
-DO NOT forget to inform the physician and nurse if you’re on medication or if you’re addicted to alcohol or other drugs; even tobacco. Furthermore, if you have alcohol or drugs in your system at the time of the examination or if you’re an addict it’s imperative that you inform hospital staff.
-If you have any suspicions whatsoever about having been drugged ask the physician to check for traces of rape drugs or similar derivatives.
-If you have any food or drug allergies inform the medical staff. You may later forget, pass out or have a seizure. Be on the safe side always.
-The examiner is trying to help you. She’s searching for signs of injury and whatever she writes in her report can be used as evidence on your behalf.
-STD`s and possible pregnancy can be determined. In the
case of the former many STDs can be successfully treated and cured if detected early. STD`s that are more complicated and without a cure should also be dealt with as soon as possible.
-Evidence should be collected as soon as possible after the
rape. This will give you the opportunity to change your mind at a later date and go through with the criminal justice process.
67
-You may feel that the entire world will find out about your secret.
-You lost all control of your destiny during the rape, now you feel helpless again.
-You really want to take a shower, throw or wash all of the
affected clothing, go home and cry like a baby.
-Don`t even comb or clean your hair. DNA and other valuable
evidence can be obtained from your body and clothing.
-A specialized counsellor who has the educational and work experience can begin helping you with you recovery process.
-Sometimes, the social worker is also a survivor of rape and/or incest.
-It’s imperative that a blood test be taken.
-Birth control pills are taken to prevent pregnancy.
-Vaccination for Hepatitis B; you may be prescribed
medication for gonorrhoea, syphilis and Chlamydia.
-You need someone caring to talk to.
-The information pertaining to your rape is confidential
and protected by law (U.S. Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Law). This law applies to adults. Minors need to know their rights in their respective jurisdictions.
-Ask about follow-up treatment and medications.
-Inform your family physician (if you have one) of what has
happened. Ask the medical staff to send an official copy of the exam results to your physician.
-You shall decide whether or not to press charges against the assailant.
-Rape kits are used to collect valuable evidence relating to the rape; semen, body fluids, hair, skin, fibres, soil samples, etc. All items of evidence are carefully marked then stored in a secure place for easy retrieval. Rape kits contain little boxes, microscope slides and plastic bags.
-If someone is charged with your rape, understand that up to 90 percent of criminal cases in the United States are plea bargained. Civil cases are similar. These are the cases that actually make it this far into the system, countless others don’t.
-There’s a statute of limitations on rape. Child rape or child molestation cases are usually exceptions as victims may be allowed to press charges against a perpetrator many years after an alleged crime.
-Find out about billing and insurance. Laws and billing
vary between jurisdictions. Rape treatment should be absolutely free however this isn’t one of the topics politicians talk about during their election campaigns and debates.
68
Remember, anyone can be raped and the rapist need not be a stranger. Oftentimes the rapist is a close family member or friend. Whether the victim was drinking or not or whether she was able to say no or not does not diminish the rape.
Furthermore, the victim need not be conscious.
With the identification of rape as a serious problem around
much of the world, an increasing number of women in North America are learning how to prevent being attacked and taking special self-defence classes. Below are some tips to help you protect yourself.
-Ask a trusted qualified person where you can find an
institution
that
offers
self-defence
classes
specifically
designed for women.
-You should learn the street fighting method first, crude but often effective. Chances are the rapist will not fight clean; you’re fighting for your mind and body.
-Martial arts can be taken, after or simultaneously with self-defence for women. If you’re small and the rapist is a large person a punch in his face or shoulder may have little or absolutely no effect upon him. You must learn how to properly attack sensitive areas such as the eyes, nose, ears, groin, shins, ear drums, knees, etc.
-Understand that mastery of the martial arts take years. In
addition, many of the leg kicks may involve stretching first.
There’s no time to stretch during a rape. Street fighting is brutal, can be very effective and if the victim is lucky lightning-fast. In a rape, you may have to fight very dirty.
Years ago an assailant was stalking a woman. She’d been raped earlier in her life and decided to learn martial arts; she got a black belt. He did the same and when the time came he beat her up martial arts style and then raped her.
-You must learn how to properly scream and shout ‘No’, etc.
-Your instructor should be qualified. Don’t be embarrassed to check his/her credentials.
-Some classes are free, however most are for money.
-Ask your local police, social service worker, hospital
staff or other victims for details.
-It may be more difficult for a victim to fight dirty
against an attacker who she loves or is closely related to, but if you’re being attacked you must defend yourself at all costs if need be.
-High kicks and fancy moves are easier to make in the
privacy of your home or in the gym with other friends and classmates. Learn them, but it’s imperative that you master the basics first.
69
-The fear, surprise and stress factors are not the same while training in a safe area; the person in the training suit that you learn how to strike won’t really fight back, he or she won’t hurt you. Fighting and survival instinct and quick action in dangerous situations is imperative.
-If it’s imperative that a potential victim must physically
fight off a rapist she must not hesitate or pull back her blows.
This may further aggravate the offender. The strikes must be smooth and automatic.
-Don’t be ashamed or embarrassed to shout or to say no, etc.
-Run for help if necessary. Potential rapists hate large crowds, a screaming victim, and if at night a lighted place.
This action may not work if you’re all alone out in the middle of nowhere.
-The potential victim may freeze up out of fear and shock.
-The potential victim may be in a situation where fighting is out of the question. The assailant/s may be armed or the victim may be thrown into a van in the dark in the middle of nowhere facing several large potential rapists.
There’s a story about a woman who’d studied self-defence for women. The rapist was a large man. He got on top of the victim, punched her in the face just once, and ended up knocking out several of her teeth, broke her nose and both of her cheek bones. The fight was basically over. He raped her after the first punch.
-You may try to calmly try to talk your way out of the situation. Victims have been known to urinate, defecate or vomit to appear repulsive to the rapist/s. Telling the rapist/s that you have an STD or a vaginal infection are other options. But this is no guarantee; he may have one or more STDs and not care.
A true story involved a woman who miraculously ‘sweet
talked’ and ‘calmly talked’ to an attacking mountain lion. The mountain lion had pounced on the woman but froze still while she sweet-talked him.
-There’s never a guarantee. Furthermore, a backlash is
always possible, but overall self-defence for women has helped many potential and former victims protect themselves from an attack. It also gives former victims a sense of more control over their own lives.
-Women who are raped as virgins have additional problems to
deal with; virginity never returns once it’s lost. In addition, women who are raped by close relatives or gang-raped, tortured in the process, or acquire lifelong incurable or potentially deadly STD’s also have additional problems to deal with.
-Many cultures around the world blame the woman for the rape regardless of the circumstances. Furthermore, in some of 70
these cultures husbands will divorce their wives; if she’s never been married and word gets out regarding the rape no man will ever marry her.
-Every woman should have access to free self-defence
classes, many rapes can be averted. If you’re in college or university your institution may offer free or subsidized
classes. Self-defence classes may be taken for credit if under the Department of Physical Education.
Regarding rape prevention some additional tips may be
followed:
-Follow your gut instincts. If someone scares you or
somehow gives you the creeps don’t be alone with this person; this applies to ‘creeps’ who are males or females. Don’t accept gifts, drinks or anything else from this person.
-If you attend a function or party go with trusted friends,
have a designated driver and try to stay together. Watch each other’s backs.
I was once told a story about a woman who was semi-
conscious in a respectable downtown Des Moines bar. A couple of guys dragged her out to their car and no one gave them a second look. Onlookers may have assumed that she was married to one of the perpetrators, or maybe they didn’t care less.
-If one of your friends leaves the party or goes off with a
stranger meet the person just in case your friend ‘disappears’
thereafter or suffers from an attack.
-Try to go to familiar places.
-Don’t give off the impression that you’re weak and
vulnerable. Rapists, even those who want their victims to struggle want to win in the end. Look confident.
-Have a cell phone on hand at all times; better yet put your iPhone to good use.
-Tell your family or friends if you plan to attend a party or event especially if it lasts into the late hours of the night.
-Keep a keen eye on your drink and food. If you leave your drink unattended and return don’t drink from it if you’re at a party.
I know of a young man who was at a party. Pop drinks were free and placed on a large counter. He took one large paper cup and then took a couple of sips from it. It turned out to be full of spit from chewing tobacco. No one saw who placed that particular cup on the counter.
-Date rape drugs are often scentless and tasteless and
can’t be distinguished from your actual drink. It’s doesn’t take much work to slip in the rape drug.
71
-Nightly walks should be with a trusted friend; better yet two or more friends. Large dogs repulse potential attackers.
-If you jog or walk alone outdoors on a daily or regular basis, change your route frequently. If you don’t the potential attacker can plan his rape to the last detail, in advance. He’ll catch you off guard. Headphones will deeply impair your auditory sense and will distract you of your surroundings.
-Don’t walk in dark secluded places, near or around
abandoned buildings or near tall grasses and hedges. These are places where you can be quickly and violently pulled into and hidden while being attacked.
-Stay on the alert. If you’re a passenger on public
transport every so often scan the area with your eyes. Know your surroundings, as someone may be following you or eyeing you intently.
-Populated well-lit areas are places rapists do not like.
-Mace or pepper spray can help however it takes time and coordination to remove the canister from your purse or pocket.
Meanwhile you’re in a scary situation. Practice at home until you’ve perfected the action. Even your keys can be used as a powerful weapon but you need to jab a sensitive area. Regarding mace or pepper spray, know what the law in your jurisdiction requires.
-If you think that you’re being followed casually confront the pursuer by asking him or her for the time. Stranger rapists don’t want you to know them or be able to identify them to the police.
-Try to use more than one self-defence method if attacked.
Screaming and yelling is natural and very effective, unless the assailant has somehow muffled your mouth or gagged you. In this regard try to physically struggle. Hit sensitive areas, it’s most effective. If you get free run to a lit/populated and scream your head off. Make it known to everyone in the area what’d just happened.
-Respond to an attack as soon and as quickly as possible.
Don’t wait too long.
-Understand that the vast majority of rapes occur by
acquaintances.
-If you live alone tell your landlord or apartment manager upon moving in that you don’t want your complete name posted on your mailbox. The first initial of your first name and your last name is sufficient.
-If your potential rapist is your husband or boyfriend you need to know what to do. You must protect yourself; you’re number one.
-Don’t judge a person solely on his/her looks. Good looks and cuteness don’t necessarily correlate with good manners and 72
behaviour. Judge a person by his/her behaviour. There’s no use in marrying or being with a cute or handsome rapist or wife beater.
-The eyes are always good targets to strike. If a rapist is
fully clothed and you try to strike his genitals you could miss or hit his penis instead. The most sensitive part of the male genitals is the testicles.
-If you’re somehow pinned to the ground or to a bed and are
overpowered calculate your strike and make it devastating. Gouge the eyes or you can grab the testicles tightly and then twist.
But for that to happen you may have to wait until he removes his underwear. If you temporarily disable your attacker flee the area. Note that failed attacks may enrage the attacker.
Wearing high heels will offset your balance, may reduce
your ability to kick, and will hinder your running speed if that’s what it takes to get away from your attacker.
Pregnant
teens
or
women,
especially
in
their
third
trimester need to take special precautions. Some rapists don’t have any problem punching or striking a pregnant woman in the stomach, especially if she tries to defend herself. A strike therein is dangerous to the victim’s health and well-being and to the unborn child.
Furthermore, if the rapist gets a pregnant woman on her back, it’ll be extra difficult to get him off. Running speed will likely be seriously hampered.
Under rare circumstances even during times of peace a
woman’s cries for help may go unheeded.
The most notorious example in North America involves the case of Catherine ‘Kitty’ Genovese, at the time a resident of Kew Gardens section of Queens, New York; a nice middle class neighbourhood. The incident occurred on the morning of March 13, 1964.
Twenty eight year-old Kitty Genovese worked in a lounge as a bar manager on Jamaica Avenue just a few blocks away from her apartment.
Kitty drove home from work arriving at home at roughly 3:15
A.M. She parked her Fiat about 30 yards from her apartment door.
But upon exiting her car she took notice of Winston Moseley
loitering and bumming around nearby. She tried in earnest to run away but Moseley was faster than her.
In spite of repeatedly shouting for help and being stabbed and raped by Moseley not a single neighbour or resident in the area came to her rescue.
Moseley had been spooked by a shouting neighbour who told him to ‘leave that girl alone’! What ensued was only a temporary delay. Thereafter, Moseley was able to stab and rape Kitty three separate times. The rapes and attacks lasted around 32 minutes.
73
To add insult to injury Moseley took 49 dollars from
Kitty’s purse.
In all, 38 people had heard the commotion, but many claimed
that they didn’t know it was a rape and brutal attack. Sometimes people just don’t want to get involved.
A word of advice to all hitchhikers, especially women, DO
NOT HITCHHIKE! It can be very dangerous. You don’t know what kind of a person the driver is, even if it’s a woman or an elderly person.
In the fall of 1978, Mary Vincent a 15 year-old girl
runaway was hitchhiking through California.
Mary Vincent ended up hitching a ride off of Lawrence
Singleton a drunkard-killer.
Mary Vincent didn’t think Singleton was dangerous because he looked like he was old enough to be her grandfather. She was dead wrong.
Singleton brutally raped Mary Vincent and then hacked off her forearms and left her for dead.
Mary Vincent survived the ordeal, living armless since
1978.
Singleton only served 8 years for that horrific crime. In 1994 he killed a Florida prostitute. This time he was sentenced to death in 1998. He died of cancer in December of 2001. The executioner missed this one.
Most hitchhikers aren’t monsters however you’ll probably
see your share of weird ones. Groping is probably a big problem for female hitchhikers.
Another horrible incident occurred in February of 2011 in Uttar Pradesh Province, India.
A 16 year-old Dalit girl had her limbs chopped off for attempting to fight off four men who were allegedly trying to rape her. The weapons of choice were axes.
The attack was orchestrated by a man who had a personal feud with the girl’s family. So I guess he felt it necessary to have her gang-raped and mutilated.
The victim was first harassed, and as a result tried to escape the harassers.
Rape,
in
a
general
sense
has
no
boundaries,
even
individuals who are mentally and/or physically disabled can be raped.
This type of rape is nothing new. Likely, it has been going
on since the beginning of rape itself. But the problem of rape of disabled females is more hidden than for that of non-disabled persons.
It’s estimated that 10 percent of the general population of
Europe suffers from any one of a number of disabilities, and the 74
numbers continue to rise. This number is likely doubled for developing countries.
In most of the world, people with disabilities, especially major or profound disabilities are ignored or overlooked by the respective society at large; governments are by no means innocent of this practice.
Disabled rape victims often have excessive obstacles to
cross; female and disabled, visible or linguistic minority, poor, uneducated or undereducated, living in a poor Third World country and/or a brutal regime, lack of adequate medical care and social services, living in war-torn or civil war-torn regions, rampant government and police corruption, misogynistic culture.
Regarding police corruption and apathy, years ago a
Pakistani woman took her young daughter to the police station to report a possible molestation by her husband. The officer responded ‘we don’t have this problem in Pakistan’! And that was the end of it.
But unfortunately, there have been incident in Pakistani
police stations where complainant woman have been raped. But this problem occurs in other Third World countries too. The people pulling the strings in these respective countries are heartless and corrupt.
For disabled females getting by or living may be quite a challenge as is. Citizenship rights are often compromised even in the developing world.
Mental and physical cruelty against disabled persons can
occur from other family members, players in the system or from outright strangers.
Females with major or profound disabilities are by far more
likely to be abused, physically, mentally and/or sexually.
It’s even worse for a female with communication or severe speech impediments. Any potential rapist will know that ‘she won’t be able to tell on me’.
Rape victims who are disabled may have additional hurdles to clear:
-Usually considerably weaker than the rapist.
-May have mobility problems.
-Severely disabled females may be a target for a rapist who
wants an easy rape or a rape without much resistance.
-Difficulty conveying or reporting the abuse or just
getting to the police station.
-Rape cases involving disabled persons require additional
and more intricate work; experts may be called in to help. The prosecutor’s office must be extra diligent in their follow-up.
75
There’s a possibility that the disabled victim may be viewed as a less credible witness or simply not believed outright.
-The victim may need the rapist for economic and everyday support (spouse, family member, land lord).
-The criminal justice system can be quite cold and
assembly-like.