Chapter twenty
Separation.
1985-1987
I started answering advertisements for somewhere to board or flat, but people must feel I'm looking too unhappy and tell me they've found somebody else.
Finally, I look at a place in Glendene. A few days later, Josie Bates rings me back to say that she wants to interview me again. It's the only offer I get, so on January 17th 1975, I move out of home. I take the minimum of belongings with me, as I am expecting to be coming back. Carole and I have our last cuddle and Roger Saxel by gives me a hand to move. We fit everything that I'm taking with me into our two cars, and then drive over to (H71) 39 Brunner Road, Glendene.
The first night I feel very, very lonely and go down into great despair. I miss my family and find that I can't sleep. I cry most of the night, until sleep comes briefly at about 3-30am.
In the weekend, I wander around the neighbourhood, trying to come to grips with my new surroundings. It all seems foreign. Driving all the way back to North Shore City, to go to work, is also strange. I'm now using more petrol and with having to pay board as well, I run out of money. Business goes right down, and one morning I don't have enough petrol to get to work and no clients booked for today and only $10 in my pocket and no money left in the bank.
I buy $10 worth of petrol on my way to work, hoping that I will pick up a client later today. Fortunately I do. It gives me enough money to fill the petrol tank and then I just manage to keep ahead.
In the weekends, I get up early and drive over to North Shore City to take Craig to school cricket. Sometimes it's canceled, due to rain. I hear about it on the radio when I'm nearly there, and all I can do is turn around and go back to Glendene.
These are very lonely days and I spend a lot of time working on the computer (Commodore) or watching videos, to keep my mind occupied. But these are things that I have to do on my own and I just become even more depressed. Life doesn't have much going for it any more.
I try everything I can to get our marriage working again, but to no avail.