Writings @ Ankur Mutreja by Ankur Mutreja - HTML preview

PLEASE NOTE: This is an HTML preview only and some elements such as links or page numbers may be incorrect.
Download the book in PDF, ePub for a complete version.

Chapter 1.1.30: Rules of Survival in Bombay oops Mumbai

Continuing their protests against the Bachchan family even after Jaya Bachchanapologised for speaking in Hindiat a function on September 6, Maharashtra Navnirman Sena (MNS) activists pelted stones at the PVR theatre in Juhu in north-west Mumbai, where the premiere of Amitabh Bachchan’s latest movie ”The Last Lear” was scheduled.

I am surprised that after living for so many years in Bombay oops Mumbai, Jaya Bachchan could make such a mistake! For the benefit of the Bachchans, there are certain other rules which they need to follow at all times for survival in Bombay oops Mumbai:

1) Give seat to a Marathi lady in preference to any other lady (if ever Bachchans travel in any public transport) and apply this rule intelligently in other similar situations.

2) Never ever in your wildest dream make fun of Shivaji.

3) Thackereys are the self acclaimed representatives of Bombayites oops Mumbaikars, and give them respect for this very reason, out of fear, of course.

4) Learn to accept that a non-Marathi is always wrong in Bombay oops Mumbai, whatever may be the dispute.

5) It’s Mumbai, not Bombay

6) And, most importantly, always remember that the color of soil in Maharashtra is RED.