As most families are dysfunctional in one shape or form, and my family is no exception, this
means there are many victim mentalities throughout the many families that are dotted all
around the world. But first, let me discuss my brothers. Since my father got away with his
actions, two of my brothers seem to be following in his footsteps. Now this angers me greatly
since they should know better and since they know what kind of monsters sex abuse creates.
With all the signs that I have noticed, I reported my concerns about my brothers to the
welfare, but they have their rules. They can’t act without proof or multiple people with
concerns. A good rule I believe, however it didn’t suit my purpose. Since I’m not the victim
and because the victims will not confess, it therefore has to go unchallenged, unless
something changes. I made an awful fuss throughout my family, so if something is going on
that shouldn’t be, my brothers knows that we are watching. Strangely enough, they never
challenged why I made a fuss. If someone was making false accusations about me, I’d want
to at least know why?
The problem I have with my brothers is that their wives have also been especially chosen as
people with a victim mentality. I’m not so sure that ‘especially chosen’ is the right term, but I
think its familiarity, or like-minded people would be more accurate. If a girl was brought up
in a family that yells, she will feel at home around other people that yell, even though most
people feel it’s a form of bullying.
As for my brothers, my concerns have got back to their partners, but they just say that they
would know if he was doing something.
Their ignorance is rolled up in their inability to look past their own concerns. Yet one in
particular has a daughter that is so angry, disrespectful and rude to her mother. I would love
to know what other reason the mother needs before she at least recognises that her daughter
has a problem of some sort. My niece knows full well that she can’t confide in her mother,
which leaves the door open if my brother has desires to sexually abusing her.
The victim mentality in both these parents brings me to another concern of mine, and that
verbal abuse, but not all verbal abusers are male. This is a role both men and women can
play, there is no discrimination here.
What I mean by verbal abuse, although the most obvious is yelling, another version is
belittlement, where comments are made that destroy a child’s ego and self-confidence. It is
almost like the parent is afraid that the child will turn out smarter or more confident than the
parent. And rather than the parent get a further education, they suppress the child’s learning
ability with derogatory comments, like calling them stupid, ignoring their shortfall at school
or by not helping with their education in general.
~ 8 ~