I get a kick out of pointing out contradictions. Specifically contradictions made by cishet men in regards to women and sex. There are so many contradicting statements cishet men spew because they seem to never understand that they can not shame women for being sexual while also asking for women to be sexual.
As I have mentioned before, calling women “hoes” never served a fruitful purpose. It is simply a way to control women and our bodies because calling women “hoes” serves no initial purpose but cause fog and mirrors. Men can never decide on what it is they want from women. Their standards always end up contradicting themselves because there is no logic or rationale in the policing of women and our bodies.
For example, how can you expect a woman to perform well in bed if you do not want a woman with experience? Men seem to think that women with a “body count” of -1 can perform in bed as if they’re porn stars. This is not how this works. Personally, I believe that men are caught up on a woman’s “body count” because it’s an ego trip for them. Once again, this goes back to men seeing women as objects. Why do you think they use language such as “She’s been ” or “Everybody done ?” Obviously they believe that our bodies depreciate in value the more we have sex since their language reflects the idea that women’s bodies are nothing but objects and the less it has been touched, the more of value and pure it is.
Another example: how in the world do you want women to have casual sex with you yet you shame women for having casual sex? We bring up young men to believe that they are to get as many girls as they can. What’s funny to me is, while we teach boys that getting a lot of girls signifies their manhood, we’re also teaching girls that they must reserve themselves for one man. Okay, the math isn’t adding up. How are you, a cishet man, suppose to have sex with multiple women when you’re telling women they shouldn’t have sex outside of a monogamous relationship? Who are you going to have sex with? Why set a standard for one thing and expect another?
What also trips me out is that men complain about women not wanting to just have sex as if they weren’t the ones to socialize women to operate like that in the first place. Many women do not want to have sex casually because they’ve been brought up to reserve sex for a man who they have an emotional connection with. If they do not reserve sex for said man, then they are called “hoes.” Women don’t want people to think they’re “easy” which is why some women make a man wait to have sex after months--maybe even years. Why be upset at a standard you set, being followed?
Now, when you do find women who just want casual sex, you feel the need to call her a “hoe.” Why? What is the point? Why not just dap her up and thank her for having consensual sex with you? Does it feel better when you have to lead a girl on, thinking that your relationship will not just be physical, in order for her to have sex with you? You realize how manipulative that sounds?
Men also have this weird thing where they want to have “no strings attached” sex but if a girl does not catch feelings after having sex with them… she’s a “hoe?” But if she does catch feelings, they call the girl annoying… What in the world? What is it that you want? Do you even know?
Another interesting contradiction is men saying that women should not make it easy for men to have sex with them but some men expect women to have sex with them for simply paying for a date or meal.
Additionally, in conversations about having sex on the first date or having sex “too soon”, men often refer to the women who have sex upfront as “hoes” and I find it so interesting. Because a woman knows what she wants--which is to have sex with you--she’s now a “hoe?” She is now not as valuable as a woman because she had sex with you “too soon”...? What does that say about you though? When your hands touch a woman you strip away her magic?
The reason why they catch themselves contradicting themselves is because most of these rules are created out of the need to police women and preserve their egos as cishet men. If one is trying to find the logic in these “rules”, you’ll only come up short. I have a solution though. It’s pretty revolutionary if I do say so myself.
Are you ready for it?
How about have consensual casual sex with a woman respect her as a fellow human being? I don’t think that’s too much to ask. Start seeing the humanity of the women you’re sleeping with and you will begin to flourish. Stop hurting your heads making up weird rules and standards. Instead, let it flow and allow women to have consensual sex whenever they want. Don’t chastise women for having casual sex and then complain about how you can’t find a woman who just wants casual sex. Don’t let your sexism make you end up playing yourself.