Three Comedies by Bjornstjerne Bjornson - HTML preview

ACT I

(SCENE.--A room in RIIS' house. An open door at the back leads into a park and gives a glimpse of the sea beyond. Windows on each side of the door. Doors also in the right and left walls. Beyond the door on the right is a piano; opposite to the piano a cupboard. In the foreground, to the right and left, two couches with small tables in front of them. Easychairs and smaller hairs scattered about. MRS. RIIS is sitting on the couch to the left, and DR. NORDAN in a chair in the centre of the room. He is wearing a straw hat pushed on to the back of his head, and has a large handkerchief spread over his knees. He is sitting with his arms folded, leaning upon his stick.)

Mrs. Riis. A penny for your thoughts!

 

Nordan. What was it you were asking me about?

 

Mrs. Riis. About that matter of Mrs. North, of course.

Nordan . That matter of Mrs. North? Well, I was talking to Christensen about it just now. He has advanced the money and is going to try and get the bank to suspend proceedings. I have told you that already. What else do you want to know?

Mrs. Riis. I want to know how much gossip there is about it, my dear friend.

Nordan. Oh, men don't gossip about each other's affairs.--By the way, isn't our friend in there (nodding towards the door on the right) going to be told about it? This seem, a good opportunity.
Mrs. Riis. Let us wait.

Nordan. Because Christensen will have to be repaid, you know. I told him he would be.

 

Mrs. Riis. Naturally. What else would you suppose?

 

Nordan (getting up). Well, I am going away for my holidays, so Christensen must look after it now.--Was it a very grand party yesterday?

 

Mrs. Riis. There was not much display.

 

Nordan. No, the Christensens' parties are never very luxurious. But I suppose there were a lot of people?

 

Mrs. Riis. I have never seen so many at a private entertainment.

 

Nordan. Is Svava up?

 

Mrs. Riis. She is out bathing.

 

Nordan. Already? Did you come home early, then?

 

Mrs. Riis. At about twelve, I think. Svava wanted to come home. My husband was late, I think.

 

Nordan. The card tables. She looked radiant, I suppose, eh?

 

Mrs. Riis. Why didn't you come?

 

Nordan. I never go to betrothal parties, and I never go to Weddings--never! I can't bear the sight of the poor victims in their veils and wreaths.

 

Mrs. Riis. But, my dear doctor, you surely think--as we all do-- that this will be a happy marriage?

 

Nordan. He is a fine lad. But, all the same--I have been taken in so often.--Oh, well!

 

Mrs. Riis. She was so happy, and is just as happy to-day.

 

Nordan. It is a pity I shall not see her. Good-bye, Mrs. Riis.

 

Mrs. Riis. Good-bye, doctor. Then you are off to-day?

Nordan . Yes, I need a change of air. Mrs. Riis. Quite so. Well, I hope you will enjoy yourself--and, many thanks for what you have done!

Nordan . It is I ought to thank you, my dear lady! I aim vexed not to be able to say goodbye to Svava. (Goes out. MRS. RIIS takes up a magazine from the table on the left and settles herself comfortably on a couch from which she can see into the park. During what follows she reads whenever opportunity allows. RIIS comes in through the door to the right, in his shirt sleeves and struggling with his collar.)

Riis. Good morning! Was that Nordan that went out just now?

Mrs. Riis . Yes. (RIIS crosses the room, then turns back and disappears through the door on the right. He comes back again immediately and goes through the same proceeding, all the tine busy with his collar.) Can I help you at all?

Riis. No--thanks all the same! These new-fangled shirts are troublesome things. I bought some in Paris.

 

Mrs. Riis. Yes, I believe you have bought a whole dozen.

Riis . A dozen and a half. (Goes into his room, comes out again in apparently the same difficulties, and walks about as before.) As a matter of fact I am wondering about something.

Mrs. Riis. It must be something complicated.

Riis . It is--it is. No doubt of it!--This collar is the very--Ah, at last! (Goes into his room and comes out again, this time with his necktie in his hand.) I have been wondering-wondering--what our dear girl's character is made up of?

Mrs. Riis. What it is made up of?

Riis . Yes--what characteristics she gets from you and what from me, and so forth. In what respects, that is to say, she takes after your family, and in what respect after mine, and so forth. Svava is a remarkable girl.

Mrs. Riis. She is that.

 

Riis. She is neither altogether you nor altogether me nor is she exactly a compound of us both.

 

Mrs. Riis. Svava is something more than that.

 

Riis. A considerable deal more than that, too. (Disappears again; then comes out with his coat on, brushing himself.) What did you say?

 

Mrs. Riis. I did not speak.--I rather think it is my mother that Svava is most like.

 

Riis. I should think so! Svava, with her quiet pleasant ways! What a thing to say!

 

Mrs. Riis. Svava can be passionate enough.

 

Riis. Svava never forgets her manners as your mother did.

 

Mrs. Riis. You never understood mother. Still, no doubt they are unlike in a great many things.

Riis. Absolutely!--Can you see now how right I was in chattering to her in various languages from the beginning, even when she was quite tiny? Can you see that now? You were opposed to my doing it.

Mrs. Riis. I was opposed to your perpetually plaguing the child, and also to the endless jumping from one thing to another.

 

Riis. But look at the result, my dear! Look at the result! (Begins to hum a tune.)

 

Mrs. Riis. You are surely never going to pretend that it is the languages that have made her what she is?

Riis (as he disappears). No, not the languages; but--(His voice is heard from within his room)--the language have done a wonderful lot! She has savoir vivre--what? (Comes out again.)

Mrs. Riis. I am sure that is not what Svava is most admired for.

Riis . No, no. On the boat, a man asked me if I were related to the Miss Riis who had founded the Kindergartens in the town. I said I had the honour to be her father. You should have seen his face! I nearly had a fit.

Mrs. Riis. Yes, the Kindergartens have been a great success from the very first.

 

Riis. And they are responsible for her getting engaged, too-- aren't they? What?

 

Mrs. Riis. You must ask her.

 

Riis. You have never even noticed my new suit.

 

Mrs. Riis. Indeed I have.

Riis. I didn't hear as much as the tiniest cry of admiration from you. Look at the harmony of it all!--the scheme of colour, even down to the shoes!--what? And the handkerchief, too!
Mrs. Riis. How old are you, dear?

Riis. Hold your tongue!--Anyway. how old do you think people take me to be?

 

Mrs. Riis. Forty, of course.

Riis. "Of course"? I don't see that it is so obvious. This suit is a kind of Bridal Symphony, composed at Cologne when I got the telegram telling me of Svava's engagement. Just think of it! At Cologne--not ten hours' journey from Paris! But I could not wait ten hours; I had risen too much in my own estimation in view of my approaching relationship with the richest family in the country.

Mrs. Riis. Is that suit all you have to show for it, then?

 

Riis. What a question! Just you wait till I have got my luggage through the customhouse!

 

Mrs. Riis. We shall be quite out of it, I suppose?

 

Riis. You out of it! When a very lucky daddy finds himself in Paris at a most tremendous moment--

 

Mrs. Riis. And what did you think of the party yesterday?

Riis . I was quite delighted with the boat for being late so that I was landed in the middle of a fête champêtre as by magic. And Naturally one had a tremendous welcome as the party was in honour of one's own only daughter!

Mrs. Riis. What time did you come in last night?

Riis . Don't you understand that we had to play cards yesterday, too? I could not get out of it; I had to make a fourth with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob--that is to say, with our host, a cabinet minister, and old Holk. It was a tremendous honour to lose one's money to grand folk like that. Because I always lose, you know.--I came home about three o'clock, I should think.--What is that you are reading?

Mrs. Riis. The Fortnightly.

 

Riis. Has there been anything good in it while I have been away? (Begins to hum a tune.)

 

Mrs. Riis. Yes--there is an article here on heredity that you must read. It has some reference to what we began to talk about.

Riis. Do you know this tune? (Goes over to the piano.) It is all the rage now. I heard it all over Germany. (Begins to play and sing, but breaks off suddenly.) I will go and fetch the music, while I think of it! (Goes into his room and comes out again with the music. Sits down and begins to play and sing again. SVAVA comes in by it, door on the left. RIIS stops when he sees her, and jumps up.) Good morning, my child! Good morning! I have hardly had a chance to say a word to you yet. At the party everyone took you away from me! (Kisses her, and comes forward with her.)

Svava. Why were you so long of coming back from abroad?

 

Riis. Why don't people give one some warning when they are going to get engaged?

 

Svava. Because people don't know anything about it themselves, till it happens! Good morning again, mother. (Kneels down beside her.)

 

Mrs. Riis. There is a delicious freshness about you, dear! Did you have a walk in the wood after your swim?

 

Svava (getting up). Yes, and just as I got home a few minutes ago Alfred passed the house and called up to me. He is coming in directly.

 

Riis. To tell you the truth--and one ought always to tell the truth--I had quite given up the hope of such happiness coming to our dear girl.

 

Svava. I know you had. I had quite given it up myself.

 

Riis. Until your fairy prince came?

 

Svava. Until my fairy prince came. And he took his time about it, too!

 

Riis. You had been waiting for him a long time, though--hadn't you?

 

Svava. Not a bit of it! I never once thought of him.

 

Riis. Now you are talking in riddles.

Svava . Yes, it is a riddle to understand how two people, who have seen each other from childhood without even giving each other a thought, suddenly--! Because that was really how it happened. It all dates from a certain moment--and then, all at once, he became quite another man in my eyes.

Riis. But in every one else's, I suppose, he is the same us before?

 

Svava. I hope so!

 

Riis. He is more lively than he was, at any rate--in my eyes.

Svava . Yes, I saw you laughing together last night. What was it? Riis. We were discussing the best way of getting through the world. I gave him my three famous rules of life.

Mrs. Riis and Svava (together). Already!

 

Riis. They were a great success. Do you remember them, you bad girl?

 

Svava. Rule number one: Never make a fool of yourself.

 

Riis. Rule number two: Never be a burden to any one.

 

Svava. Rule number three: Always be in the fashion. They are not very hard to remember, because they art neither obscure nor profound.

Riis. But all the harder to put into practice! And thus is a great virtue in all rules of life.--I congratulate you on your new morning frock. Under the circumstances it is really charming.

Svava. "Under the circumstances" means, I suppose, considering that you have had no hand in it.

Riis . Yes, because I should never have chosen that trimming. However, the "under the circumstances" is not so bad. A good cut, too--yes. Aha! Just you wail till my portmanteau comes!

Svava. Some surprises for us?

 

Riis. Big ones!--By the way, I have something here. (Goes into his room.)

 

Svava. Do you know, mother, he seems to me more restless than ever.

 

Mrs. Riis. That is happiness, dear.

Svava . And yet father's restlessness has always something a little sad about it. He is--. (RIIS comes out of his room again.) Do you know what I heard a cabinet minister say about you yesterday?

Riis. A man of that stamp is sure to say something worth hearing.

 

Svava. "We all always look upon your father, Miss Riis, as our Well-dressed man par excellence."

 

Riis. Ah, a bien dit son excellence! But I can tell you something better than that. You are getting your father a knighthood.

Svava. I am? Riis. Yes, who else? Of course the Government has once or twice made use of me to some small degree in connection with various commercial treaties; but now, as our great man's brother-in-law, I am going to be made a Knight of St. Olaf!

Svava. I congratulate you.

 

Riis. Well, when it rains on the parson it drips on the clerk, you know.

 

Svava. You are really most unexpectedly modest in your new position.

Riis. Am I not!--And now you shall see me as a modest showman of beautiful dresses-that is to say, of drawings of dresses-- still more modest than the showman, from the latest play at the Français.

Svava. Oh no, dad--not now!

 

Mrs. Riis. We won't start on that till the afternoon.

Riis . One would really think I were the only woman of the lot! However, as you please. You rule the world! Well, then, I have another proposition to make, in two parts. Part one, that we sit down!

Svava. We sit down! (She and her father sit.)

 

Riis. And next, that you tell your newly-returned parent exactly how it all happened. All about that "riddle," you know!

 

Svava. Oh, that!--You must excuse me; I cannot t you about that.

Riis. Not in all its sweet details, of course! Good heavens, who would be so barbarous as to ask such a thing in the first delicious month of an engagement! No, I of only I want you to tell us what was the primum mobile in the matter.

Svava. Oh, I understand. Yes, I will tell you that because that really means teaching you to know Alfred's true character.

 

Riis. For instance--how did you come to speak to him?

 

Svava. Well, that was those darling Kindergartens of ours--

 

Riis. Oho!--Your darling Kindergartens, you mean?

 

Svava. What, when there are over a hundred girls there--?

 

Riis. Never mind about that! I suppose he came to bring a donation? Svava. Yes, he came several times with a donation--

 

Riis. Aha!

 

Svava. And one day we were talking about luxury saying that it was better to use one's time and money in our way, than to use them in luxurious living.

 

Riis. But how do you define luxury?

 

Svava. We did not discuss that at all. But I saw that he considered luxury to be immoral.

 

Riis. Luxury immoral!

 

Svava. Yes, I know that is not your opinion. But it is mine.

 

Riis. Your mother's, you mean, and your grand mother's.

 

Svava. Exactly; but mine too, if you don't object?

 

Riis. Not I!

Svava . I mentioned that little incident that happened to us when we were in America--do you remember? We had gone to a temperance meeting, and saw women drive up who were going to support the cause of abstinence, and yet were--well, of course we did not know their circumstances--but to judge from their appearance, with their carriages and horses, their jewellery and dresses-- especially their jewellery--they must have been worth, say--

Riis. Say many thousands of dollars! No doubt about it.

 

Svava. There is no doubt about it. And don't you think that is really just as disgraceful debauchery, in its town way, as drink is in its?

 

Riis. Oh, well--!

 

Svava. Yes, you shrug your shoulders. Alfred did not do that. He told me of his own experiences--in great cities. It was horrible!

 

Riis. What was horrible?

 

Svava. The contrast between poverty and wealth--between the bitterest want and the most reckless luxury.

 

Riis. Oh--that! I thought, perhaps--. However, go on!

 

Svava. He did not sit looking quite indifferent and clean his nails. Riis. I beg your pardon.

Svava . Oh, please go on, dear!--No, he prophesied a great social revolution, and spoke so fervently about it--and it was then that he told me what his ideas about wealth were. It was the greatest possible surprise to me--and a new idea to me, too, to some extent. You should have seen how handsome he looked!

Riis. Handsome, did you say?

 

Svava. Isn't he handsome? I think so, at all events. And so does mother, I think?

 

Mrs. Riis (without looking up from her book). And so does mother.

 

Riis. Mothers always fall in love with their daughters' young men--but they fall out again when they become their mothers-in-law!

 

Svava. Is that your experience?

 

Riis. That is my experience. So Alfred Christensen has blossomed into a beauty? Well, we must consider that settled.

 

Svava. He stood there so sure of himself, and looking so honest and clean--for that is an essential thing, you know.

 

Riis. What exactly do you mean by "clean," my dear?

 

Svava. I mean just what the word means.

 

Riis. Exactly--but I want to know what meaning attach to the word.

 

Svava. Well--the meaning that I hope any one would attach to it if they used the word of me.

 

Riis. Do you attach the same meaning to it if it is used' of a man, as you would if it were used of a girl?

 

Svava. Yes, of course.

 

Riis. And do you suppose that Christensen's son--

 

Svava (getting up). Father, you are insulting me!

 

Riis. How can the fact of his being his father's son I an insult to you?

Svava . In that respect he is not his father's son! I am not likely to make any mistake in a thing of that sort!
Mrs. Riis. I am just reading about inherited tendencies. It is Not necessary to suppose that he has inherited all his father's.

Riis. Oh, well--have it as you please! I am afraid all these superhuman theories of yours. You will never get through the world with them.

 

Svava. What do you mean?--Mother, what does father mean?

 

Mrs. Riis. I suppose he means that all men are alike. And one must allow that it is true.

 

Svava. You do not really mean that?

 

Riis. But why get so excited about it?--Come and sit down! And, besides, how can you possibly tell?

 

Svava. Tell? What?

 

Riis. Well, in each individual case--

 

Svava. --whether the man I see standing before me or walking past me is an unclean, disgusting beast--or a man?

 

Riis. Etcetera, etcetera!--You may make mistakes, my dear Svava?

Svava . No--not any more than I should make a mistake about you, father, when you begin to tease me with your horrid principles! Because, in spite of them, you are the chastest and most refined man I know.

Mrs. Riis (laying down her book). Are you going to keep that morning frock on, dear child? Won't you change your dress before Alfred comes?

Svava . No, mother, I am not going to be put off like that.--By this time I have seen so many of my girl friends giving themselves trustfully to their "fairy prince," as they think, and waking in the arms of a beast. I shall not risk that! I shall not make that mistake!

Mrs. Riis. Well, as it is, there is no occasion for you to get heated about it. Alfred is a man of honour.

Svava . He is. But I have heard of one shocking experience after another. There was poor Helga, only a month ago! And I myself-- I can speak about it now, for I am happy now and feel secure--I can tell you now why I have been so long about it. For a long time I did nut dare to trust myself; because I too have been on the brink of being deceived.

Riis and Mrs. Riis (together, starting up from their chairs). You, Svava? Svava. I was quite young at the time. Like most young girls, I was looking for my ideal, and found it in a young, vivacious man --I won't describe him more accurately. He had-oh, the noblest principles and the highest aims--the most complete contrast to you in that respect father! To say I loved him, is much too mild; I worshipped him. But I never can tell you what I discovered or how I discovered it. It was the time when you all thought I had--

Mrs. Riis. --something wrong with your lungs? Is it possible, child? Was it then?

 

Svava. Yes, it was then.--No on