SOMA | The Meme Dump
NICK
Whatever that means. I need to close the file on you, Levon Monk.
Levon begins to weep.
NICK
I need to close the file on you, before I freak, too...
LEVON
I'll go to jail. Whatever you want.
NICK
Back to Plan A? Just like that?
Nick points with the flamethrower.
LEVON
Please! Please!
Levon grovels at Nick's feet.
NICK
This is gross. I’ll need to tax you at least, or I won’t be able to live with myself. I have a compensation package for you. Sign half of it over to me, and we'll go back to the original plan.
LEVON
Compensation?
NICK
Yes, LB. Even though you’ve breached your contract several times over, I'd feel like a shithead stealing from you outright. Sign over half your compensation to me and we'll arrange for the police to pick you up somewhere. You should be out of jail before long, considering we're roasting all the evidence.
Nick pulls a thick envelope from his pocket and tosses it to Levon.
Levon opens the envelope. It's loaded with QR code vouchers for 145
SOMA | The Meme Dump
various brandname merchandise. The vouchers have pictures of plasma televisions, models wearing designer suits and hip hop fashion, and various merchandise with conspicuous logos. Levon thumbs through the vouchers.
LEVON
Ferraribrand car mats? An official NY Yankees ball cap signed by hip artist Brap Rhymer. Limited edition giclee print by graffiti artist Elicser...
Levon shuffles the pile manically.
NICK
I just need a signature to transfer them to my name.
LEVON
50% off Yama Spa: chemical peel and facial.
NICK
Ah, that's a good one.
LEVON
80% Nike braceaction pump sneakers. The pump is back...
NICK
Even if I take half, this merch will give you a serious lifestyle boost.
Levon giggles madly, fanning the vouchers with his filthy fingers.
LEVON
Coupons?!
NICK
Equity compensation, fucker. It’s the new standard.
LEVON
Ha!