The Great Detective & the Missing Footballer by Gurmeet Mattu - HTML preview

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31

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“So you don't allow your sexuality to influence you in your place of work?”

“Hardly. I'm engaged to a ballet dancer called Justin.”

“Now, it has been said that Jimmy was attracted to older women.”

“So I've heard.”

“But he never mentioned it to you?”

“He could hardly be going out with my sister and tell me he fancied my granny.”

“Quite.”

It was at this point that I returned from my stroll and so the account from here is coloured by my own interpretation.

I had barely taken off my coat when Holms announced, “Ah Wilson, young McCusker here has just been telling me he's a homosexual.”

I must confessed that I jumped back, quite startled. “He's sitting in my chair!” I complained.

“It's not contagious,” McCusker answered cattily.

“That’s not what I mean, I replied, “I don't like anybody sitting in my armchair.”

“Where is your sense of hospitality, Wilson?” Holms commanded. “Mr McCusker is our guest.”

“Sorry, McCusker,” I explained, “just that I've got a thing about bottoms.”

“Really?” McCusker responded brightly.

“Lot of germs on bottoms. Seen a lot of good men laid low by bottoms.”

“So have I,” the young man replied.

“Wilson, be a good chap and have Mrs Houston bring us up some tea.”

“Will do,” I answered quickly, eager to avoid the direction the conversation with the footballer was taking. I hared off downstairs to give Mrs Houston her orders while Holms continued the interview.

“To cases, Mr McCusker, did you ever see Jimmy with an older woman?”

“No.”

“Never?”

“Well, he liked to have a joke with old Janine in the dining room.”

“Aha.”

“But everybody did, Janine's a good laugh.”

“So, there was no spark of romance between them?”

“She's a dry old thing, but you wouldn't get a spark out of her, not even with a boy scout.”

I returned from my errand immediately, eager not to miss any part of what promised to be a fascinating conversation. “This homo business, does it cause you any problems in the football world?” I asked young McCusker which caused him to laugh.

“You've got be kidding. Your team mates give you grief, the opposition players give you grief, the fans give you grief and Justin's scared I'll get hurt.”

“But why choose such a life then?” I continued.

“Because, I'm a gay football player and that’s all I ever can be.”