Dear Willie,
How often should a married couple (17 years) make love? Berenice and I normally manage once a week, but she insist her friends are doing it much more often, but I find this hard to believe. Jocelyn is buck-toothed and Eva lacks girly bumps, so I don’t see their husbands being too keen on their conjugals.
Anyway, Berenice thinks we should be at it like knives but I am afraid I might hurt my knees. What do you suggest would be a suitable frequency?
Roland, Alice Springs
Dear Roland,
The frequency of conjugals is always a hard call as women have many calls on their time, like knitting quiche etc. However, as it is Berenice that is making these demands of you I can only assume that she has time on your hands, in which case I would suggest that you get a young, handsome, gardener. He could deal with Berenice’s carnal needs and also do your garden (thus further saving your knees) as he would not want you to suspect that he was doing what you had hired him to do. I hope this makes sense Willie