Dear Willie,
I write to you about the curse of unemployment. Ever since he was laid off my husband hangs around the house and gets in the way. This means that my lover can no longer visit me each afternoon as he used to do.
At first I thought that my husband would take care of my needs but he has proved singularly useless, probably because he has access to my body at night. Do employers have no thought for frustrated wives?
Shouldn’t the government be doing something about this and create employment? How can I get Alf a job so I can have it off with Sid?
Wilma, Invergordon
Dear Wilma,
Jobs are, indeed, hard to find, but hobbies are not. Encourage Alf to take up a sport such as golf but ensure that he is not very good at it so that you can enjoy long afternoons with Sid.
Willie