Chapter Five
Maggie felt a chill shudder through her, and noticed that her front window was partially open. She got up from her cozy spot on the sofa and reached to close it. But she realized that the chill air alone wasn’t making her cold. Tonight she felt drained and alone, left to the confines of her own prison-apartment without the company of anyone else, and certainly not the regular visitor who had frequented her place in the past, Darlene. She was shocked and dismayed at how bitterly she missed her friend, and as she got back on the sofa, she pulled her knees tightly to her body and wrapped her arms around them.
The place felt smaller, stuffier. Emotions surfaced that she hadn’t wanted to tend to, emotions bitter with grief and isolation. Darlene had become like a ghost, the image of her face springing up before her eyes like a laughing vapor, reminding her of an innocent life that had been ripped away much too early that had any right to be. She was angry, and with a force that nearly knocked her over, bitter vengeance surged through her, causing her to shake.
She told herself that she needed to sleep, and turned off the light in the living room to make her way towards the bedroom. She sucked in a sharp breath as she went past the window and saw the shrouded figure below: Landon. He was wearing a hooded gray sweatshirt with his hands in his front pocket. Billowing clouds of white fog billowed from his mouth as he turned and looked up impatiently in her direction. In horror, Maggie turned from the window and hoped that he had not seen her. Was he waiting for someone? And what was he doing at her building? It was a very late hour and seeing Landon was the last thing on her mind, and the last thing that she wanted to do. She should have realized that he would be coming back sometime soon, but nevertheless she began thinking of excuses to turn him away. He looked at his watch and ambled away from the street corner, apparently coming in the way of the building. Maggie ran from the window, threw on her terrycloth robe, and waited for the coming onslaught.
She heard the buzz and knew who was going to be at the other end. “Yes, Landon?” she answered.
“Baby doll, let me in,” he said. “You and I need to have a talk and this can’t wait any longer.” Maggie heaved a sigh, ready to come up with a casual lie or something that would at least stall him another day or two. But the lapse of silence stole away her chance. “If you don’t let me in I’ll find some other way to get to you. If we don’t meet here then we’ll meet some other way; and you know it. I don’t have all day so just buzz me in.”
“Landon, I’m done with all of that,” she said into the intercom. “I tried to tell you the last time you were here that I was never going to be into that again.”
“Then just let me up and we can talk about that once I get inside.”
Maggie didn’t really feel like fighting tonight. So she considered it for a long time, heard the buzzer again, pressed her eyes closed and sighed heavily, and finally pressed the button that would unlock the front door. Feeling defeated, she crossed her arms and waited on the couch for him to get upstairs, feeling every inch of her nerves tighten at the thought of him coming up here.
She listened to the noises outside of her door, the pattering of feet down the hall, the whoosh of wind coming through an open window, and giddy laughter and music wafting over from next door. I may as well face up to him now, she thought. There was no use in waiting any longer, she realized. The terror from her past would only haunt her for a long time to come if she chose to ignore it. The lies, the manipulation, the using: all that was associated with her and her past with Landon seemed to swarm in her head, filling her with anxiety and rage. And yet he had almost been like a family member, tending to their needs and treating them like sisters. One minute he was tender and sensitive to their needs, asking if there was anything he could supply them with, and the next he was rough and brutal, physically forcing them to go out and sell their bodies to mongrels.
The sound of heavy footsteps came from the hallway, plodding in her direction. Maggie could feel a draft heavier than usual as the footsteps approached her door. Boom! Boom! Boom! The pounds echoed in the hallway and into her apartment, shaking the floor and furniture.
She edged to the back of the door, her hands shaking. She braced herself, then unlatched the lock and opened the door.
“Babydoll, it’s me again. Aren’t you glad to see me?” He was angled against the side of the door, leaning to his left with his right hand in his leather jacket pocket. Maggie smelled the sweet, pungent scent of marijuana smoke wafting from his clothes, although the man himself looked sober. His hair was slicked back with gel, and he smelled minty, as though he had just brushed his teeth. His clothes, though they were the same ones he usually wore, were pressed and neat on his slightly muscular body. Landon’s dark eyes bore into her as he swaggered to a straightened position, and when he caught her eye, he winked.
Maggie could not be more revolted by the sight of him, though. What she wanted more than anything else was to put her past with him behind her, and move on to other things. But she had a creeping feeling that Landon was in no way going to leave her alone—at least, not for now.
“Well, aren’t you going to let me in?” he asked, his voice husky, his eyes narrowing.
Maggie thought she would stall him for a little while, and decided to make conversation. “Yes, Landon, but I want to know why you’re here first. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you, and I would think that you’d be able to assume that I have moved on with my life. I’m not interested in that trashy lifestyle anymore. I had hoped you could accept that. It’s a path filled with so many dangers and so many ways to get yourself in trouble. I just can’t put myself in that position anymore.”
Landon eyed her again. “And I would think that you would want to discuss our recent loss,” he said. Maggie noticed how he used the word our—meaning that the loss was his, as well. She doubted if he felt any grief for Darlene at all, considering how heartless he had always shown himself to be.
Maggie had nothing to say to his last comment. “You didn’t come to talk me into working with you again?”
Landon started to appear impatient. “Just let me in, and we can talk. Surely you trust me enough to let me in.”
Maggie nearly bit back a laugh at his last words. Nevertheless, she was not about to have him coming back again and again, and maybe someday breaking his way in like he did the last time. Furthermore, she didn’t want to rile his anger, for she knew him to have a destructive and somewhat violent temper. Learning from past experiences, she knew never to cross this man the wrong way, because his reaction, no matter how impulsive, was not something she wanted to handle again. To be sure, she was frightened of the man, and not just because he was a full head taller than her and could beat her into a pulp. She had seen too many of his manipulative ways to ever trust him.
“Alright,” she said, “but only for a little while. It’s late and I want to get an early start tomorrow morning.”
Landon pushed his way inside, visually measuring the inside of her apartment. Maggie, shaking a little bit, looked downwards and then up at his back, hoping that she was not making a grave mistake.
With his hands in his pockets, he took a few paces around the little cozy apartment, his shoes tracking some freshly fallen snow onto her orange-and-brown circular area rug. Maggie noticed but didn’t say anything, eager to get this night over with. Then he slumped down onto the sofa, hauling one bended leg on top of the seat next to him. He looked up innocently into her eyes as she came forward to sit with him, and Maggie knew that his calm was just on the surface, for there was forever a fire of anger writhing within him, just waiting to be unleashed at the slightest provocation.
“I have to say I was shocked about what happened to Darlene,” he said as she was still standing. She picked up the remnant of a newspaper that was perched on the available seat next to Landon, placed it on the coffee table, and sat down. He had a look in his eyes of a man who was crushed. Could it have been an act? Maggie would not think for a second that he would ever be out of shape over one of his former prostitutes. Images, flashes of the life she had led with him came before her eyes. She saw the lust in customers’ eyes as they led her away. Landon counting a wad of bills as they made a deal. Him hitting her, leaving her bruised and beaten on top of a filthy, damaged floor. There were flashy clothing and gifts; the promises of a better life. All this made her shiver, and she didn’t want to meet his gaze.
“It came suddenly,” Maggie said vacantly, hoping that the general statement would appease him.
Landon picked up a wad of tissues from the coffee table and started picking at it. “Nothing will ever be the same. I never wanted anything to happen to my girls. I still can’t believe it’s happened.”
“You must have cared for her a lot,” she said with a hint of sarcasm in her voice. “You have known us for years. I can imagine how it’s been a shock to you.”
Then, in a move that startled her so much that she flinched, Landon slammed his fist into the table, making it reverberate. “It should never have happened,” he said, “and I would like to kill the sick bastard who did this. If I hadn’t of just gotten out of the slammer, I would find him and murder him with my own two hands. Did they say how long this has been going on? Is there anything you know about the killer?”
“It’s happened twice before, and the police think that the same person is involved. That’s one of the reasons I’ve decided to quit the scene. They say he’s a serial killer who’s been targeting prostitutes. I just couldn’t take that risk, and I had wanted to stop for a long time. The feeling of guilt overwhelmed me. In a way, this horrible tragedy has brought along with it a blessing—it is bringing me out of a no-good life, one that might have ended much too soon. I know it’s horrible to think that way, but if there was anything that came of Darlene’s death, is that she is saving me. I can’t look back. I just can’t.”
“How are you gonna get by?” he said then. “Are you gonna to look for a job? Baby doll, I’ve known you since you were a teenager and you’ve never had a job. How are you going to be able to afford living here?”
Maggie wiped stray tears from her eyes and sniffed her nose. “I’ll find a job somehow if it’s the last thing that I do. I cannot live that life anymore, I simply cannot. It’s damaged me in more ways than I can tell you, and I’m going to have to be recovering for the rest of my life. I met a nice police officer—“
Landon cut her off. “Wait a minute. So you’re telling me that a police officer has talked you into leaving me? Are you crazy? Of course a cop is going to tell you that. Have you allowed him to completely persuade you? Is there anything that I need to be worried about with the two of you? Maggie, don’t listen to anything he says. The bottom line for every cop is the law. He doesn’t know about the life you used to live. He doesn’t know about how much I saved you from. Since you got away from your bastard father and your witch mother, you could have ended up on the streets, with nothing. But I made sure that you had everything that you needed, and wasn’t it exciting along the way? There’s no one who could take care of you like I do.”
Maggie knew that he would change the conversation back to this. She should have known, the second that she let him in… “I know, Landon,” she lied, “but that’s beside the point. I don’t want to be involved with this filth anymore. I’m damaging my body and my heart, and those are not things I can afford to lose. And Sam is not someone you should be afraid of. He’s a very nice man, and he’s only out for my best interests. I don’t want to wind up dead like Darlene! A killer is out there, and that’s one more reason why I should become straight. I can’t do that with you. I hope so much that you could understand that. There’s no way in a million years that I’m going back to that.”
“I can get you money, Star. Before long you’re going to be out there on your own, and you’ll have nothing. I can protect you from a little killer. With me around, you’ll never have to worry about anyone bothering you like that. Darlene hadn’t had me at the time, and look where it got her. I won’t let anyone touch you, and you can rest assured that you’re gonna be safe.”
Landon’s promises did not assuage her. “I won’t change my mind. The best thing for me to do is to cut ties with you. After tonight, I don’t want to see you again. Please don’t come around here, Landon. I don’t want to be involved with you anymore.”
He looked like he had been punched in the face. Looking so dejected, he crossed his arms in front of his chest and looked down at his toes. “I’m sorry to hear you say that, Star,” he said. “Because you and I could have had a wonderful relationship. You would never have to worry about the bills, and life would be so much easier. I would think that after all that we shared you would have a little bit of loyalty to me, but I guess I was wrong.” He lifted his head and turned to her. “Didn’t I give you and the girls a nice life? Look at this beautiful place. Didn’t I always make sure that you were alright? Tell me truthfully, didn’t I provide for you?”
Maggie was silent for a few moments. “I can’t…” she simply said.
“Then I guess there’s no reason for me to hang around here any longer,” he said. “I may as well leave.” He eyed her for a long moment, and then a look of resignation washed over him. He pulled himself up slowly, straightened his jacket, and turned. “I’m very sorry…” he said. “So sorry.”
Maggie watched him leave with his head down. He trod heavily towards the door, yanked it open, then with a crash it closed. His footsteps disappeared down the hall, and then there was no trace of him.