Role models
During my first year at university I had been offered the chance to try out with the Hawthorn Football Club. Hawthorn is one of the AFL football clubs, then it was the VFL, Victorian Football League. Hawthorn has been one of the most successful football clubs in Australia during the past fifty years. At the time I first went there they had only won one premiership. But during the previous few years they had begun to show signs of significant improvement and it was a great time to be offered the opportunity to try out at this club.
In the three years and four pre-seasons I spent there I did not play a game in the senior team, only playing in the Under 19's and the "reserves" team. But I still regard it as the second best experience of my life, second only to being the father of my two children. It is the only time in my life that I have belonged to, or been associated with, a group of people who were nearly all, almost completely committed to a common goal, where it was mandatory to put any selfish goals you might have aside and do what was best for the team.
The coach, John Kennedy, was the main reason it was such a great experience. He set a standard of expectations for performance that was very high. The training often pushed you to your limits physically to a point where it became a test of mind over matter. The game plan was very simple - attack the ball, win the contest, never stop competing and never give in. He created a culture at that club that remains strong nearly fifty years later, and in doing so he laid the foundations for the years of success that has followed.
This is something that very few people experience in their lives. Most people work in organisations and companies where nearly everyone only has their own interests at heart. There is never a time when individuals are prepared to sacrifice themselves for the greater good, rather they will do everything they can to see that someone else is sacrificed if that is what has to happen.
During my first year at this football club I met a player who was to become one of the two role models for my children. They never met him but I spoke to them about him many times. He was quite simply the happiest, friendliest person I ever met. A champion player, he was small of stature but very determined, very courageous and full of fighting spirit.
Peter Crimmins captained Hawthorn in 1974 and 1975, but had to stop playing in 1976 while he faced a battle with cancer. Sadly, he died of cancer towards the end of that year, 3 days after Hawthorn won the premiership and a group of players took the premiership cup to share with him at his home. When that happened, the world lost a true champion in every sense of the word.
Gary had an unshakeable, unbreakable self esteem which allowed him to take on new challenges with confidence and, again, nearly always with a sense of fun. He spoke easily and confidently to everyone, whether it was a social function or a presentation he had to make at Uni. I have always believed that having these character and personality attributes would have played a large part in the success he has had.
I only met his family maybe half a dozen times, but his family was clearly very different from my own. His father's love for his family was obvious, especially for his wife, and there were always clear and open signs of affection. His father had a good sense of humour and joked a lot. He was a man clearly happy with his place in life.
Gary's father had told him when he was young that "he was as good as any person on the planet" and I believe that may have been one of the keys to his high level of self esteem. When you think about this advice you soon realise that it is totally true, and yet most people probably won't appreciate the power in this statement. Everyone is as good as any other person on the planet; we are all created as equals in the eyes of god. This is regardless of how much success you have or don't have in your life. If you fail a maths exam that doesn't make you any lesser a person; it might just mean you are not good at maths or you need to study more!
How good it must be to believe in yourself as a person, completely independent of your successes or failures. This later became one of the fundamental concepts in the development of my kids. They must have high self esteem.
My "profile of a winner" is included at the back of this book. here The first draft of this was written shortly after I attended Gary's 50th birthday party celebration in Sydney, about 15 years ago now. It was based on my personal assessment of him.