There is a lot of misinformation around about when you should have sex in order to improve your chances of conceiving. In schools, teenagers are taught that they could have sex at any time during their cycle and fall pregnant, but this is not accurate.
The best time to have sex in order to conceive is ideally 2-3 days before you ovulate. This is your most fertile time and you have the highest chances of conceiving before you actually release an egg.
Of course, this leads to the problem of knowing exactly when you’re going to ovulate in the first place.
Ideally, a monthly menstrual cycle should last 28 days, with day one being the first day of your period. Some doctors state that ovulation is usually on day 14 of a menstrual cycle, so many women decide to plan to have sex on day 14, hoping to increase their chances of getting pregnant.
The problem with this approach is that not every woman has an exact 28 day cycle. Similarly, not every woman will ovulate on exactly day 14. You might ovulate on day 10 or on day 17.
There are ways to predict ovulation using basal body temperature kits or ovulation predictor kits, both of which are available at most pharmacies.
However, the single most reliable predictor of when you’re at your most fertile point of the month is on the day you notice the most fertile cervical mucus discharge.
Cervical mucus is the discharge that is sticky, clear and a little like raw egg white. Having sex when you notice the cervical mucus is important, simply because this discharge is what aids sperm in surviving and swimming to the egg more effectively.
Timing When to Have Sex
Unfortunately, when many women decide to put off having sex until they notice their cervical mucus discharge, they tend to abstain completely until it’s the “right time”. They also tend to avoid sex at other times during the cycle.
This can mean sex becomes a chore or a routine. It becomes less about love and connection, which can increase strain on a relationship and increase stress levels for both of you.
Of course, you may also find that, even though the woman might be at her peak fertility time, you could be reducing the male’s sperm quality without even knowing it.
You see, if you wait to have sex for a week or two before you notice the signs of ovulation, you risk your partner’s sperm quality being at less than peak quality.
This is because a male’s sperm quality and quantity will peak after only one or two days of abstinence. If you’ve made him wait for 10, the quality and quantity may not be ideal for optimum fertility rates.
Ideally, if you’re planning to conceive, having sex twice a week, regardless of the fertility signs can actually strengthen the connection between you, as well as increase fertility for each of you at the same time.
Stop timing when to have sex and work on having a little fun together instead.
Good Sex = Better Chances of Conception
As mentioned in the previous section, many women become so preoccupied in trying to figure out the right time of the month to have sex that they forget about having fun and enjoying it.
When you have sex based on a calendar or a time table, it can lose a lot of the ‘fun’ factor. This can build resentment and cause stress, which can become a factor in keeping you infertile.
Researchers have shown that women who orgasm during sex can increase their chances of falling pregnant. This is because the spasmodic contractions of the uterus can actually help pull the sperm further into the uterus rather than remaining in the vagina where it can leak out far more easily.
Sex Positions
Yes, there are some sexual positions that are naturally going to help your chances of conception better than others. Of course, it’s still possible to get pregnant with any position at all. However, some positions may help increase your chances.
Keep in mind that if a woman enjoys sex on top, this could reduce the chances of as much sperm getting to where it needs to go. Gravity plays a part here, so if you’re on top, the sperm is going to leak out more easily.
For the more adventurous types, you might be a little disappointed to hear that missionary position is still the leading favorite position for optimal conception.
Ideally, place a pillow under your hips to tilt your pelvis up, but be sure the pillow isn’t too large, as you don’t want the sperm pooling behind your cervix. This will also help keep the sperm in longer and give the sperm more time to easily swim up through the cervix where it needs to go to reach the egg. Don’t get up immediately after sex to wash or wipe, either. Allow the sperm to stay in for as long as possible.
However, if you have a tipped uterus, you may find that the “doggy position” might be more beneficial for you. Go ahead and get onto your hands and knees, and encourage your partner to enter from behind. He’ll have fun and you’ll be increasing your chances of getting that sperm where it needs to go.
There’s still a lot of fun to be had experimenting with variations on the missionary position without reducing your conception odds. See what you and your partner can come up with to work on ways to add spice to the missionary position to increase the fun factor, while still remaining in the right position for the most possible sperm to reach your uterus.