SOMEONE CRIED “SMILE!” AND WE ALL DID,
MY, WHAT A SIGHT THAT MUST BE,
US TOOTHLESS OLD WRINKLIES ALL HUNCHED TOGETHER
HAVING OUR AFTERNOON TEA.
CRUMBS ON THE TABLE AND DOWN ON THE FLOOR
IT CANNOT BE HELPED YOU SEE,
THEY FALL THROUGH THE GAPS THAT WE HAVE IN OUR MOUTHS
THE ONES WHERE OUR TEETH USED TO BE.
THERE’S PUDDLES OF TEA IN OUR SAUCERS
AND DRIBBLES HAVE RUN DOWN OUR CHIN,
AND IF THEY’D PUT SOMETHING INTO OUR CUPS
JUST THINK OF THE MESS WE’D BE IN.
WE COME HERE EACH WEDNESDAY P.M.
TO PARTAKE OF OUR AFTERNOON TEA,
BUT TODAY IS A SPECIAL OCCASION
OLD TOM IS 100 YOU SEE!