In the depths of despair
In the far reaches of desperation
In a dark and miry pit
You are there
I don’t feel You
I don’t see Your light illuminating the thick impenetrable darkness around me
I don’t feel Your comfort and touch for the gnawing and deep pain within me
But I know that You are there
I don’t see Your purpose and plan for where I am
I can’t see a reason for it
I can’t see Your hope that I will come out of the pit I’m in
I’ve plummeted down to the depths and there seems little hope of rescue and escape
I pray, people pray for me, there seems little change
I don’t feel You with me
But I know You are there
And I know that you are good
Slowly, I crawl upwards, out of the pit
I keep falling back into it again
But each time I’m a little nearer the exit, the light that shines far away
Like an insect, I am drawn to it, desperate for it, for a glimpse of life outside the darkness and turmoil that I feel
I’m on a journey
And as I get closer to the light
I can see I’ve been using unseen footholds
That all along You’ve been working and helping me get out
I look at myself, the journey has made me stronger already
I’ve built strength in muscles I’ve not had to use so much before
My eyes have now grown accustomed to the darkness and although I keep searching for the light, I’m stronger in the dark than I’ve ever been
There’s still a long way to go before I reach the exit, the journey carries on
But I know now I will reach the light
Though the path may be indirect, uneven, rocky and challenging
I will escape, there is hope
I know You have been with me the whole way and I can trust You to aid and assist me to the end
Thank you that I need You and that I can rely on You
I know the pit has changed me, that You have changed me and I will emerge a different person; stronger with a new and well-founded identity, ready for the future whatever that may bring, holding all things loosely but You
Knowing that You will never leave or forsake me, that You use all things for good, that I can trust in Your plan and purpose independent of how I feel and what is going on around me
Gripping to You like the footholds and never letting go again