Develop Your Communication Skills
Synopsis
If there is one thing inevitable in a relationship, it is no other than conflicts. We are living in an imperfect world anyway. For your information, conflict in itself is not a problem. However, how you handle it can make or break your relationship.
Examine It Well
Misunderstandings, disagreements and poor communication skills can be the primary sources of distance and angers. If handled well through healthy communication, they may be a springboard to better relationships and brighter futures. So, it is very important to develop your communication skills.
The following are the ways to do that:
Stay Focused – There are times that it is quite tempting to bring up the unrelated problems in the past when dealing with present ones. This unfortunately clouds the real issue and makes searching for solution to the present issue impossible. To have a healthy communication with your partner, do not bring up the hurts and issues in the past. By staying focused on the present, you can understand each other.
Listen Very Carefully – People usually think they are listening, but in reality, they are thinking about what to say next in the event that the other person has already stopped talking. Effective conversation goes both ways. While it may be difficult on your part, you have to listen to whatever your partner is talking about. Don’t dare to interrupt and don’t be defensive. In doing so, you will just understand him/her better.
Know Your Partner’s Point of View – In any conflict, people always want to be understood and heard. They talk about their point of view in order for the other person to see things the way they do. The ironic thing is that the more they insist their point of view, the more they are left misunderstood. If this always happens to you, it is about time to give an end to it. Why don’t you know your partner’s point of view, so that he/she will feel heard? In return, he/she will do the same to you.
Try to React to Criticism with Empathy – When your partner criticizes you, it is easy to think and feel that he/she is wrong, so you will get defensive. While it is something unbearable to hear, it is crucial to listen to the pain of your partner and react with empathy for what he/she feels. You also have to figure out what is true in what they are saying, as it can be a valuable detail for you.
Admit What’s Yours – You can only say that communication is effective when you learn to admit that you are wrong. If in case you both share the same responsibility in a problem, you have to admit what is yours. It will diffuse the situation and spur maturity. Doing so will also inspire your partner to react kindly, so it would help you both to understand each other and to figure out the right solution.
Search for Compromise – Instead of attempting to win the argument, why don’t you search for the right solution that is favorable for both of you? Always bear in mind that healthy communication entails searching for a solution that both parties can be happy with.
Don’t Dare Give Up – Though it is a good idea to take a short break from the discussion, you need to come back to it. However, make sure that both of you approach the situation with mutual respect, and constructive attitude to arrive to an ideal solution. Unless it is time to surrender on the relationship, do not surrender on communication.
These are just some of the most helpful tips that will help you develop your communication skills. By following them, you can avoid a long and irritating argument with your partner.
