Dealing with Divorce 4 Part EBook Series: Your Children (Part 2) by Galbraith Family Law - HTML preview

Chapter 2: Who Can Help Me?

Should We Get a Counselor for the Children?

Often children benefit from having their own counselor. A counselor is a neutral and supportive party who keeps their conversations with the children confidential.

Divorce is a difficult transition for children. In time, they may not need the counselor to deal with divorce-related issues, but other issues may arise. For example, teenagers certainly have many issues and often an allergic reaction to anything their parents say. A counselor can help them through challenging years.

Initially, during the divorce, they may attend more frequently due to their need. Over time, they may go two or three times a year. Costs not covered by a health benefit plan would be shared in proportion to you and your spouse’s income or shared equally.

Will We Use a Family Specialist?

We recommend our clients work with a Family Specialist. They are trained professionals who can help you and your spouse craft a parenting plan in the best interests of your children. As parenting experts, they are aware of the latest research on the developmental needs of children, especially those going through a divorce.  They do more than establish a time-sharing regime, they can help you plan for potential future challenges, such as introducing new partners, the teenage years, how you will communicate regarding issues and challenges that may arise.

A Family Specialist:

• Is trained to handle the needs of children, especially those whose parents are going through a divorce. They help you and your spouse develop a parenting plan that works for your children.
• Helps develop an agreement on the time your children will spend with each of you on a regular basis and over holidays but the Family Specialist does much more.
• Brings the voice of the children to the negotiations about parenting. Often, the Family Specialist will meet with your children to determine their particular needs and wishes.
• Educates you and your spouse on the most recent research regarding the developmental needs of the children, especially those whose parents are separating and divorcing.

A parenting plan may include references on how you will deal with sensitive issues in the future to minimize future conflicts. For example, how and when new partners will be introduced to the children.

Can We Afford This?

The cost of a Family Specialist is substantially less than the cost for each of you to pay for a lawyer. Further, the cost of the Family Specialist can be shared by you and your spouse resulting in a cost-effective way to resolve parenting issues

Like a mediator, the Family Specialist will help you and your spouse discover your core concerns around parenting so you can develop a parenting plan that meets those core concerns. As a neutral and  objective expert, your Family Specialist will ensure that the parenting plan is in the best interests of your children.

When the Family Specialist has completed the parenting plan, it will be sent to the lawyers. Your lawyer will review it with you and offer advice. If acceptable to both parties, it will be appended to the separation agreement and become a legally binding agreement.