CHAPTER III
DAY 2
THE FIRM ROCK, GRIMY CHILDREN WITH BEAUTIFUL EYES, AND CAVES OF
DEATH
Thursday, July 28th, 2011. At 8:30 pm.
So much housework to do today. From morning to evening, I couldn’t find the time to have a quiet time with God. I became sad as I thought I had missed my sweet Jesus’ visit.
But at the end of the day, God provided me the time to be alone.
It was never my husband’s thing to take the kids out at nights. But that night, he wanted to buy something at the supermarket and wanted to bring along the kids with him. And so he and my two small children went out. I chose to stay home.
I didn’t waste a single second. Right away I went to my room and knelt in His presence. I gave thanks and began to worship Jesus. I love Him with all my heart. Our Saviour is truly good, immeasurable is His love. There is nothing more that I want than to dwell in His love.
As I immersed myself in God’s presence, all at once my room became bright. That light came on again.
I saw Lord Jesus. He was standing in the middle of the room. This time He showed Himself to me in my room. He looked at me with His tender loving gaze.
"My Lord ..." I prostrated myself before Him.
Tears of joy were dripping down my face. Once again I was touched by His love. His presence brought joy and happiness that no words could describe.
"Come, My daughter."
Jesus took my hand and He held it tight. Straightaway my spirit went with Him into the spirit realm.
The Firm Rock
Jesus took me to a beach. There were lots of huge sturdy rocks by the water’s edge.
We sat on one smaller rock. I looked around and saw how stunning the beach was. But the waves were violent. They surged up onto the beach and then quickly flowed back out to sea.
There were more violent waves at the other end of the beach, where huge rocks stood firm. Waves over there could surge up to 30 feet high, and hit the rocks with great strength.
The sea did not rest, and the fierce wind blew ceaselessly. My hair fluttered in the wind. Waves kept crashing into rocks without mercy.
Jesus stared at the rocks, then turned to me and said, "My daughter, you are as firm as a rock.”
I looked at Jesus, confused.
"But Lord, I am weak and certainly not as firm as a rock."
"My daughter, I say to you, you are as firm as a rock."
I was deeply touched. A rock is symbolized in Christianity in a few different ways, but there is one in general. It basically represents the steadfastness of our faith in Christ.
I still felt that I did not deserve to receive such a statement.
Jesus spoke again, saying, "Those who hear My words and obey them, they are like a firm rock. When the winds blow and a violent storm arises, they remain steadfast in their faith and hope. They shall not be swept away, either by the fierce waves of worldly temptations or by the waves of infliction.
“They shall not fall when the winds of deceptions blow and beat against them. They shall not be moved, as they have set their love upon Me. As firm as a rock they will stand to the end."
Jesus has said it all. We must be as firm as a rock that stands unmoved when the rain falls and the floods come and the winds blow and beat against us. God wants us to have unshakable faith and continuing hope in Him. It is the foundation for a victorious life.
And I believe what Jesus said earlier was intended for you too. You too are as firm as a rock. We are as firm as a rock if we trust God and be faithful until the end.
We must keep standing firm in our faith, be stronger everyday, and never ever lose hope!
Do Not Worry About Tomorrow
Jesus looked up to the sky. It was a sunny day. The sky was bright blue with white fluffy clouds adorning it here and there. A flock of birds was flying in the sky.
Jesus pointed to the birds and He said, "Look at the birds of the air, they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father keeps feeding them. Are you not worth much more than they?”
His words were exactly as written in Matthew 6:26. It was a blessing to hear it directly.
I always amazed at His words. It made me wonder, if the situation was similar when He spoke to the crowds thousands of years ago. Did He look up to the sky too at that time, and saw the birds, when He was teaching them about not to worry?
How charming is our Savior. How I adore Him. His beautiful hair fluttered in the wind. I was charmed by Him completely. I could imagine His disciples and the crowds that followed Him must be awed too by His charisma and everything about Him. Jesus is so glorious and enchanting in every way.
"The birds sow not,” Jesus said again, “neither do they reap, nor gather into barns, yet your Father feedeth them.”
He looked at me and said, "Tell My children, that they do not have to worry about what they shall eat, or what they shall drink, or what they shall wear. Father knows well everything they need.
“They must seek first of all His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto them.
“The circumstances may get more difficult but Father shall provide everything His children need. It shall be given to them. I say unto you, every need shall be supplied.”
Jesus embraced me then kissed my forehead.
"You are beautiful," He said softly, "My daughter, you are precious in My sight. I love you."
Tears rolled down my face. His love touched my heart so deeply. Jesus wiped my tears away with His fingers.
"I love you too my Savior," I whispered. I could hardly speak. The joy from the feeling of being loved was overwhelming.
I laid my head on His shoulder. Jesus embraced me again then kissed me on my head.
This togetherness is truly priceless. I treasure every moment spent with Jesus.
Jesus has the sweetest love. His love is the purest. Jesus loves us so much that while we were still sinners, He died for us.
Our God is full of compassion. He loves us so much that He lets us be called His children, as we truly are. God is tender and compassionate to those who fear Him.
Jesus looked happy when He embraced me. He often showed affection when I was with Him.
In fact, this is what happens when we worship God. This is why God wants us to worship Him in spirit and in truth.
God is a Spirit. We must worship Him in spirit and in truth. When our spirits yearn and wait upon the Lord, He will encounter us. And He would show sweet affection.
Our God is compassionate and affectionate. He loves to show affection to us because we are His children and He loves us as a father.
You may not realize it but this is what happens when you worship Jesus in spirit and in truth. The Holy Spirit will express His love to you in spirit, to your spirit.
He would hold you in His arms, and kiss you on the cheek or forehead, stroke your hair and kiss it with great affection, wipe your tears away with His fingers, and say how He loves you and you don’t have to worry about anything because He takes care of you and protects you.
Sometimes it feels so real.
Grimy Children with Beautiful Eyes
We left the beach afterwards, and walked to the next place. The Lord said the place was near.
We walked about thirty yards when the Lord stopped.
He pointed forward. "Look over there.”
I looked where Jesus was pointing and saw a group of children not too far away. I walked over to them.
There were around thirty young children, boys and girls aged around 4 to 8 years old. Some were sitting on the ground and some were squatting. Not one child was standing.
Everyone was looking down. It turned out they were busy playing. They didn’t play together but each played alone.
I looked more closely to find out what they were playing. The kids didn’t notice me at all.
I didn’t see any toys in their little hands. It turned out they were playing with the soil. They were digging in soil. And they did it with their bare hands, instead of using shovels or scoops. Their little hands were quite nimble at digging.
There were many small holes in the ground as a result of their digging. Then I noticed they weren’t just playing with the soil, but it seemed they were looking for something in the ground.
What are they looking for? I wondered.
Deftly they kept scratching and scraping the ground. These kids were so filthy. Soil and mud soiled their clothes, hands, and feet. Even on their faces and hair too. They were dirty from head to toe.
These children didn’t pay attention to anything else other than just scratching the ground. They were so focused on digging and never moved from their positions. Every child was busy scratching and digging. Again I wondered, what were they trying to find?
I looked closer.
And I was shocked.
The soil was full of worms that were wiggling and slimy. It was disgusting!
But the children weren’t disgusted or bothered by the worms at all. They kept digging and digging without a break, trying to find something in that wormy ground.
Worms were everywhere. I saw them all over the soil surface, and all over these children’s hands, feet, clothes, and hair as well!
"Are they unaware of the worms because they’re too busy digging? And what exactly are they trying to find?” I muttered to myself.
Questions were running through my mind. I needed to ask the Lord about it.
But I couldn’t find Jesus by my side. I looked around and was surprised to find Him standing quite far, about 20 yards behind me. It was strange because He is usually never that far from me.
Then I noticed this area had two different sections. The first section was a beautiful green pasture, and the other section was the wormy land.
The children were on the wormy land, while I was standing on the green pastures area. I was pretty close to the children. If I took one or two more steps forward, I would enter the wormy land. I stood at the edge of the pasture.
There was a forest located roughly 15 yards behind these children. The forest was dense and dark, filled with tall trees close to each other. It was a very large forest. Anyone could easily get lost in there.
Jesus still stood at a distance. I looked at Him, waiting for His words.
"My daughter," the Lord spoke at last, "these children symbolize those who do not let Me work in their lives. They are always too busy for Me because they prioritize their own interests and desires above all else.”
The Lord’s voice was heard clearly as if He stood close to me.
"Day and night they pursue worldly desires and never set aside time for Me. They know the Word but only listen to the Word without obeying it and being a doer of it.
"They keep digging to find something that does not exist, yet they never realize it. Futility is what they shall obtain in the end. I say unto you, worldly desires can never be satisfied. And wealth and treasure cannot be kept forever.
"As you can see there, they dig ceaselessly. They dig and keep digging but never find what they are looking for. As a result they only defile themselves with dirt and worms.
“My daughter, those who pursue worldly desires are like this. They soil themselves with sins while trying to obtain happiness, comfort, and prosperity from the world. They seek it from the wrong source. The world cannot give anything. It is passing away, perishing with all its desires and greed.”
"The world can only offer false and fake happiness. It is not real, like a shadow. Many people are chasing it; they try to catch it in their hands. But when they think they have it, the shadow disappears from their hands. Many people think they have it, but in truth, they do not. For it is not possible for the world to give true joy and comfort and contentment to men.
"The more one loves the world, the more he defiles himself with sins. People like this are symbolized as young children because they never grow spiritually. They call themselves Christians, yet they refuse to grow in faith as My disciples. They are not My disciples.”
Jesus started to walk heading this way. As He looked at the children, I saw a glimpse of sadness in His eyes. I knew Jesus loves them so much and all He wanted was for them to stop digging and spend time with Him.
Jesus kept stepping forward.
But when He was about 5 yards more to the children, Jesus stopped abruptly.
He paused for a few seconds, then started to walk again. Slowly and carefully this time.
The Lord inched forward very slowly, it seemed He was trying not to make a sound.
Jesus was getting closer. He was now only 3 yards away from me and the children. Then He stopped again.
He reached out His hands to the children from where He was. Oh how He longs so much to hold them in His arms!
Not one child was aware of His presence. Everyone was still busy digging.
The Lord stepped again, this time even more carefully. He was closer now.
Some of the children lifted their heads and saw Him.
Jesus stopped right away knowing they noticed Him. They stared at Jesus, then they frowned at Him.
A few seconds later, the rest of the children turned to Jesus at the same time. They frowned at Him too.
These young children weren’t pleased to see the Lord. Rather annoyed they seemed.
Jesus took another step forward.
All at once the children took one step backwards. They moved backwards while still squatting.
The Lord reached out His hands to them again as He took another step forward. And they took another step backwards. The closer Jesus got, the more they backed away.
Jesus stopped approaching.
He then turned to me and said, "I don’t want them to keep moving backwards. If I keep approaching, they would run into that forest.” He pointed to the forest located not too far behind the children. “It is very dangerous; many wild beasts and ferocious animals are there."
The forest was dark and looked frightening indeed. For some reason I felt that it was waiting for the children to enter it.
I could not imagine if they go into that forest. Surely they would not survive.
Jesus pointed at the children. “This is the picture of those who call themselves Christians yet never wish Me to come near them.”
The children were still staring at Jesus with a dark frown on their little faces, bothered by His presence.
“They never let Father work His will in them,” the Lord spoke again, ignoring their displeasure at Him, “nor are they willing to do their tasks to expand Father’s kingdom. These are the kind of people who hide their talents in the ground and never use them."
"They cannot stand the tests of faith. They are not patient under trial nor willing to stand up under temptation. Never want to learn to have the endurance, because they refuse to be formed and perfected according to Father’s perfect will. If a test of faith comes, they will distrust and desert Me right away."
The children stared at Jesus angrily as He spoke these words to me. It made them feel uncomfortable. Even more, they didn’t like being distracted from their diggings.
"Forest and the beasts symbolize the powers of darkness and demons. When a test of faith comes and they feel that it is too much to bear, they will run away from it. They will run into the woods, without knowing the beasts have been waiting to devour them.
“Whoever enters that forest will be killed by the beasts. This means spiritual death. It happens when one decides to turn away from their faith for the sake of life convenience offered by the world and the darkness."
How terrifying this was. And it made me wonder how many “Christians” are out there who are spiritually dead?
One little girl turned to me. She frowned as she saw me.
Then all the kids turned to me. They just realized I was there.
Angrily they looked at me. I was very close to them. Even though they didn’t say anything, I knew they wanted me to go away immediately.
I shivered in disgust as I saw the worms crawling all over their bodies. But I noticed something interesting. These children’s eyes were so beautiful. Big and bright, clear and innocent like a baby’s eyes.
Their eyes were sparkling and shining on their filthy faces.
Jesus walked away from the children and found a rock to sit on. I walked over to Him and sat with Him.
He watched the children sadly. They were back digging in the ground.
Tears fell down the Lord’s face. "I long to hold them in My arms but they do not wish to come near. They keep moving away, getting closer and closer to the forest. They keep moving backwards without realizing it. Sooner or later, one day, they will find themselves in the woods. But it will be too late to escape as the beasts will prey on them straight away.”
How frightening. It is a tragic thing when one is not willing to crucify the flesh with its passions and desires.
Then I remembered about how beautiful these children’s eyes. "Lord, why their eyes so beautiful?”
"It symbolizes a sincere heart,” He replied. “These people sincerely loved Me but they never wished to give up their earthly desires. Now their hearts have turned away from Me because no servant is able to serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will stand by and be devoted to the one and despise the other.”
Now I see why Jesus was so heartbroken. I see why He loves the children so much. They used to love Him too. They used to be His children. Jesus longs to have them in His arms again as it used to be.
“And they that are Christ's have crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts.” (Galatians 5:24 – KJV)
Caves of Death
Jesus held my hand and took me walking to the next place.
The atmosphere changed as we walked. It became tense and eerie, and the sky grew darker and darker. We reached the place in a few minutes.
The sky had become completely dark when we arrived. No moon or stars up above, not even a single star.
I looked around to find out about the place, but saw only darkness. It was so thick I couldn’t even see my own hand.
This was unusual darkness. I felt that it was smothering me.
I held the Lord’s hand more tightly. I became alarmed. What is this place? Why is it so dark here?
"My daughter, look around you."
Right after Jesus said that, a luminous mist slowly descended from the sky. It then spread throughout the entire area, illuminating it with its soft yellow light.
The area became a little brighter like a dark room lit by a candle light. Not too bright, but enough to see everything decently.
There were high sturdy mountains all around me. It turned out I was at the foot of the mountains.
But they were no ordinary mountains. Each mountain had tiny caves all over it, from base to top. There were thousands and thousands of caves with the same size. From afar, the caves looked like little black holes all over those giant mountains.
Cave I: Cave of Disappointment
"Come, My daughter. Let’s take a look what’s inside those caves."
In the blink of an eye, we already stood in front of a cave.
I stepped inside cautiously. The cave was dark and cramped, measured around 6 m2.
The light from the mist outside barely reached inside the cave. A bit dark in there, it took my eyes some time to adjust to darkness.
My eyes fell upon something in the left corner.
Someone was sitting there. It surprised me to find anyone in there. I thought the dark cave was empty.
It was a man. He sat in the darkness with his head down.
The man was grimy. He wore gray, ragged clothes that looked so shabby and dingy. His hair and beard were long and unkempt. It seemed he hadn’t been taking care of himself for a long time.
He didn’t move at all.
I was just about to ask the Lord about this man when all of a sudden he looked up and stared at me.
He stared at me sharply. I froze.
Next thing he jumped to his feet! His sudden movement shocked me.
"ARRRRGHH....!!"
He screamed so loudly. Then grumbled indistinctly. The man looked angry.
"I am disappointed. I am so disappointed!” He shouted loud. "I am disappointed. I am so disappointed! I am disappointed. I am so disappointed!"
The same words repeated again and again.
"I hate God," he hissed. He looked at me in the eyes as if he wanted to convince me that he really hated God. “I'm very disappointed with God. For years I prayed to God for a good wife, but He doesn’t answer. Does He know I’m getting old? Does He know I feel lonely? I watched my friends got engaged and married while I’m still by myself.”
He spat on the ground.
"His promises are all lies!” he yelled out. “Not one of my prayers is answered. Prayers are useless, a waste of time! I’m so angry and disappointed with God. I just don’t understand why He doesn’t give me a soulmate while He gives others their soulmates. God certainly loves them more. God is unjust! What have I done to deserve this? I was faithful to Him!”
He snorted in disgust and grumbled again as he paced the tiny cave.
"AARRGGHH... “ he screamed again.
“AARRGGH... AAARRRGHH….AAAARGHHHH!!"
He screamed and screamed like crazy. Screaming out his frustration and anger.
As if not satisfied with just screaming, he began to punch the cave wall. He punched it hard, again and again.
Blood dripped down his fist. Yet he did not stop. He kept hitting the wall as hard as possible, with all his strength!
I heard sounds of bones cracking.
"AAAARGGGHHH.... AAAAAARGGGGHHHH… "
His screams echoed everywhere. This time not just screams of anger, but screams in pain as well. He must be in great pain! Yet he would not stop hitting the wall with his crushed fist.
More and more blood dripped down his fist. He was extremely hurting himself.
It was absolute horror. I didn’t know what to do to calm the man down, couldn’t even open my mouth to say something.
He finally stopped after some time.
Again he raved about the same disappointments as he paced the cave for a while. Then he went back to the dark corner, and sat down. He lifted his knees and put his head on them.
He became silent.
The man sat there, motionless.
As I still watched him closely, I detected a strange foul odor. It smelled like a decaying body.
I looked around to find where the smell might possibly came from, and then I realized that the odor was coming from the man.
“Is he dead, my Lord? Why does he smell like this? Wasn’t he still alive just now?” I was confused.
"My daughter," Jesus said, "Disappointments lead to spiritual death."
I startled. The man was stiff. He died in a sitting position.
Jesus didn’t say anything else. He looked at the man sadly, then took my hand and led me out of the cave.
Cave II: Cave of Sorrow and Distrust
As we headed to the next cave, I realized something. This whole area was very quiet. An eerie silence gripped the area with the feeling of death. I sensed the atmosphere of death so thick in the air.
We arrived at the next cave.
I entered, and once again found someone in the dark corner.
A woman this time; she was standing facing the wall. With her back to me, I couldn’t see her face. I just noticed her mid-length hair was pretty neat, curled under at the ends.
She wore shabby and dirty clothes. They were gray and ragged, like the man’s in the first cave. The woman stood still.
She was sad it seemed. I heard her sobbing quietly.
I was about to step closer when all of a sudden she turned around. She did it very quickly, so it shocked me. I stiffened as she looked at me with her sharp cold gaze.
"AAAARRGGHHH...."
She screamed out of the blue, with her eyes still fixed on me. Her scream was ladened with sorrow.
Tears streamed down her cheeks. Next thing she was weeping and wailing, lamenting for something - for so long.
It was the most heartbreaking cry I’ve ever heard. She was really sad.
"Y-you know... “she spoke haltingly, her sobbing made it difficult to speak, "I have served God for so long…”
She took deep breaths several times to stop the sobbing.
"For many years,” she said more clearly now,”I have faithfully served the Lord. But do you know what I get in return? God took away my husband! God took him away from me! My husband died in a car accident!"
She cried hysterically. Tears streamed down her face again. She cried tears of rage.
"Why did He do this to me?" She raised her voice. "Is this the reward for all the sacrifices I made to Him all this time? Why did God do this to me when He knew exactly I’d be crushed into pieces because of it?
"Now I hate Him so much! He is not a loving Father! He is not merciful! Why did He let my husband die in a horrible car crash? God is cruel and heartless!"
She cursed God and spat a few times on the ground.
The woman began to weep again. Her eyes were red and swollen from crying too much.
I was speechless and didn’t know what to do. She was completely devastated.
"I thought God loved me…“she said softly, “but I was wrong.”
She put her face into her hands. “I miss my husband... I really miss my husband... I miss my husband… I really miss my husband…"she said it over and over again.
Jesus shed tears. I couldn’t hold back my tears too. She looked so miserable.
The woman cried and cried for a while, then stepped into the corner. She stood facing the wall as before. Motionless, like a lifeless wax statue.
All the crying and the wailing stopped. She became silent.
Once again the dreadful silence gripped as the smell of rotting body wafted. And I knew right away that the woman had died.