There I was, very excited to fly alone with one purpose: having fun. I'd chosen Milan – I thought it would be a good start. I spoke the language, I liked Italian fashion so I could shop, and there was enough to do and see for a weekend.

I must confess that I had mixed feelings before my departure. I was very excited at the start and the closer I was getting to the trip, the more anxious I was. I was afraid of the loneliness; not having anyone to talk to. Or the way others would look at me. And what if I was kidnapped raped or killed by the Italian mafia? Or what if I did not find my way to get from one place to another? What if I got lost on the Italian metro? What if my driver didn't show at the airport in Milan? How would I get to the hotel? Or if he couldn't find my hotel? What if the hotel did not have my reservation?

My brain was bubbling. I almost cancelled my trip but managed to overcome my anguish. I had to, and wanted to, take up the challenge. To give it up would be a failure for me. All my life I had met challenges and won them, why was I so afraid of a simple trip to a city whose language I spoke? Plus, I had been to Australia alone for one year. I went to China alone for six months and didn't speak Chinese. Three days in Milan would be perfect to begin with. So just after lunch on Friday, I headed towards Heathrow for Milan Linate Airport.

On the plane, I was trying to guess the men and women travelling alone. I thought maybe I could make friends and share some experiences with them in Milan.

Unfortunately, the business class area was not called ‘Business’ for nothing. I was surrounded by businessmen and women all working on their laptops or reading the Financial Times. Boring! Obviously, none of them were coming for fun. So, I plunged back into my Vogue magazine, relaxed. I was ready to face Milan and my fears.

At 4pm, I landed in Milan. I got off the plane and at the exit; my driver was waiting for me with a sign with my name. So far, I was very happy to have made the journey without a hitch.

The driver picked up my suitcase, and we got into his car heading towards the Straf Hotel in the centre of Milan.

At 4:45pm, I checked in at the hotel without any problems. Straf was a very trendy hotel. I really liked the modern interior with its contemporary arts and its location was just 50 yards from the Duomo Cathedral.

During my journey from the airport, I saw a few amazing places I wanted to see. I already knew I wouldn't get bored. I was really looking forward to walking around Milan.

But in my room, it was another story. I lay down on the bed and stared at the ceiling trying to calm a rising and throbbing anxiety. In truth, I was still terrified of being unable to enjoy this trip. I realised that I was really going to have no one to share my pleasures with. Worse, locked in my room, there would be no one to give me the courage to go out.

I was really out of my comfort zone, and it was stronger than me. I did not want to get out of bed. Then, after a few hours of watching the art deco ceiling, a primary need grabbed me: hunger. I didn't want my family and friends to find me dead from starvation. I decided to eat at the hotel, not really ready to face the city. Taking the elevator, I was addressed by a young woman admiring my Hermes watch. We started a friendly chat; she worked at the hotel and asked me about my trip. I explained why I was in Milan. She admired my courage and gave me some recommendations on things to see, clubs and restaurants.

I felt encouraged, but I still wanted to eat and stay at the hotel. This was as far as I was willing to go. Upon entering the restaurant, I decided to ask for a discreet table; I did not want to be seen alone at a table in the middle of the restaurant. I was seated at a table in a corner near a very cute middle-aged couple. Great! Exactly what I needed… not!

I ordered my early dinner almost immediately, not wanting to stay too long in the restaurant. After my delicious smoked salmon, the couple began to talk to me. Meet Emily and Joseph: Americans, both 38, and flying back to the USA the following morning. They told me about their amazing adventures in and out of Milan, which I really enjoyed listening to. We had a good laugh and talked all evening about politics, economics, art and books. Thanks to that very nice couple, I spent a very pleasant first evening in Milan. From that time forth, I had the courage to leave the hotel and decided to go out and have fun. I decided to dress up and go out to dance. I needed to free all my fears and dancing was a good remedy.

I decided to go to Byblos. I can tell you that I made more than 1000 steps in my bedroom before leaving the hotel. It was when the reception called me to advise on the arrival of my taxi that I had to move my buttocks. I was all dressed up with my red Versace dress and my Dior pochette.

When my taxi arrived at Byblos, I was really intimidated by the people queuing to get in and the chic atmosphere. Damn! I had been expecting a small neighbourhood club, and I was not sure it was a good club for me to begin with. It was way too big.

Still, I walked timidly towards the long queue when a security guard stopped me abruptly. He, then, grabbed me warmly by the shoulder and made me jump the queue. I did not understand what was going on. Inside, a woman accompanied me to the bar inside, and I wondered if they had mistaken me for someone else. I didn't say anything, loving the way I was being treated.

At the bar, I didn't even have time to order my drink before a man came to talk to me. Wow, sacré Italians! He offered me a glass of Prosecco, and we started chatting.

Meet Andrea: a very fun, 36-year-old, athletic, dark hair, dark eyes and very well-dressed gentleman. I though, he was a designer or a tailor, but Andrea worked at Gucci as a manager of their flagship store in Milan. Therefore, it was only fair to talk about fashion, Vogue, and Italian brands. Andrea invited me to visit him the next day for a discount. I had never had such a big smile on my face since my first Christmas on Earth. I started to really like this trip.

Then I heard Mylo's song, Doctor Pressure, and all hell broke loose. I was on the dance floor and did not leave it until closing at 5am. That night, I made so many friends and had so much fun. I added the whole club on Facebook, ok well; I am French so I may be exaggerating a bit.

Around 6:30am, I collapsed in my hotel room with a pleasant and relieved smile.

Saturday

I forced myself to wake up around 10am. I showered and decided to go to the Duomo. The weather was fantastic, I was all-joyful, I felt uninhibited, and I wanted to discover the city. I had a coffee outside in a café overlooking the Duomo Cathedral.

Then, I decided to walk into the city, a sandwich in my hand, and went to see all the sights, including: Duomo, Brera, Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II, Basilica di Sant'Ambrogio, San Babila, the Columns of San Lorenzo and so much more...

I decided to go to Gucci before heading home and planning another night out and dinner. I took the metro to Napoleone station where all the luxury boutiques were. When I reached Gucci on Via Monte Napoleone, Andrea was talking to a client. The store was amazing, and they had a few Limited Edition items, only findable in Milan. I wanted to buy everything but where would I put it all? I didn't have any space in my suitcase. Plus, I didn’t want to het a 15-year loan just for clothes and accessories! Mmm, well, maybe I should?

Andrea came over to me, giving me a big hug. We had a laugh about the night before, and he asked me what I wanted to have. I picked a pair of jeans and some flats. As soon as Andrea advised that I would be paying 50% less than the actual price, I felt the sudden urge to add a dress and a pair of heels. Oh, my God! What was I doing?

Andrea gave me his phone number for us to meet later in the night for a gig in town. I couldn't wait. I walked out of Gucci with a big smile and decided to walk back towards my hotel.

And indeed, I got lost! I was in the middle of nowhere when it started pouring like hell. No cabs! No buses! And no station. I was mega wet, and my Gucci shopping bag was almost falling apart. Out of those big drops of rain, I managed to see a cab and ran toward it. Thank God!

Upon my arrival at the hotel, a group of men were occupying the entrance. They were very loud. I paid the cab and headed towards them; they all stared at me like they had just seen the Cicciolina (the most famous Italian porn star of the planet). They made me feel shy, and I got into the hotel, blushing purple.

Why did they look at me that way? Well, I probably looked miserable with my makeup falling apart! I ran into the lift and in its mirror, I realised that not only I was wet, but my white lace bra was showing through my white t-shirt with my nipples saying hello to the world. I pushed the close button erratically, hearing people coming my way. But three other men managed to get in. I tried to hide my nipples with my sodden Gucci bag.

The men started talking to me, asking me if I wanted to join them that night. They said that they were waiting for a taxi and could wait for me. I declined the offer; it was out of the question for me to get into a cab with six strange men. But I asked where they were heading and offered to join them later in the night. They were going to the Armani Night Club. Interesting… I thought I could have a drink or two with them and join Andrea later. I promised to join them after my dinner in the city. Before that, I had to take a shower and dress up.

I decided to eat at Maio Restaurant to have an evening view of the Duomo. This time I had nobody to disturb me; I was having dinner with me, myself and I. I was admiring the Duomo and thinking about life. I was triumphant I had made the trip, I didn't feel alone at all; I felt free and alive. I didn't have any pressure or schedule to respect.

I had a lavish dinner and headed towards the Armani Night Club, all smiling and happy to live that experience. When I entered the Armani Night Club, it was very dark, and I realised that I couldn't remember the faces of the guys at the hotel. Merde! I decided to have a tour around and go if I couldn't remember and locate any of them. But I didn't need to. As soon as I ordered my drink, they arrived. So meet Simone and his two friends Leonardo and Alessandro from Venice. Simone was very tall, big-mouthed and very good-looking. The proper Italian look. His friend Leonardo was blond, dark eye, and very, very slim. So thin, I felt like I was heavier than him. And Alessandro was beautiful. I hadn't noticed him in the lift, but this guy was very cute. Dark long wavy hair, green almond eyes and an amazing torso shown by a V-neck t-shirt. While Simone was talking to me, I couldn't stop admiring him. He smiled timidly. I interrupted, “And you guys? How are you enjoying Milano so far?”

These men had all come in town for a stag-do, and it was their first time in Milan like me. I joined their VIP table, but soon after that, Alessandro and I got a small table and started talking. I understood that Alessandro was a professional rugby player. He was playing for the Squadra Azzurra and was originally from Southern Italy, now living in Venice.

We chatted and danced until midnight. Alessandro was a pleasure to look at. He was so handsome and didn't know it, which made him ultra-cute. We left the club before the others and Alessandro came to my room for a while – we chatted, we kissed, we caressed, and he politely left the room around 2am. We planned our date for the next day. I had an impromptu date in Milan and I suddenly realised that I completely forgot about Andrea de Gucci.

Sunday

Alessandro knocked on my door around 9am. I wasn't really ready, but I welcomed him. He was so sweet; he ordered breakfast through the room service, and brought a bouquet of roses. We had breakfast together and hit the town around 11am.

It was a beautiful day; Alessandro and I decided to go to the Galleria d'Arte Moderna hand-in-hand like an old couple. Later, we headed toward the Sforza Castle, sandwiches in hand. The date was cute, and so was Alessandro. He completely enthralled me. His accent, the way he touched me and his kisses. He mentioned his family and his seven sisters and brothers. He was the youngest of them all and had 15 nieces and nephews. It was so impressive. He related his story about how he started rugby and how his dad tried to force him to get into football.

After the Castello Sforzesco, we sat in the Sempione Park and we French-kissed for hours and hours, touching each other’s bodies like nobody could see us. We were indefatigable. I was twitter-padded; Alessandro was so handsome, and his body was so toned and defined. All my senses were challenged; it was so good to experience a pure romance. Alessandro gave me his phone number – I accepted, knowing that I would probably never call him. He left reluctantly as his flight was later on that day. We had an emotional goodbye hug, and I stayed in the park for a while just floating and I headed toward my hotel before having my last dinner in Milan.

For my last night, I decided to treat myself, and asked the hotel to book a table for one at Cracco. When I arrived at Cracco with my newest Gucci dress and shoes, I was treated like a Queen from the arrival; the personalised welcome, the service, the attention to detail. I was served some amuse-bouche, which I found really delicious. I went for the tagliolini with white truffle, and I absolutely loved the creamy sauce. All the food was well-presented, attentively served and tasted amazing! I was really happy, especially when I had the opportunity and the luck to be greeted by Carlo Cracco. I spoke with him for a few minutes and it made my night.

What a trip!

I liked these moments alone, when I wasn't speaking and I didn't have to listen to others. I could dream, think, and look at people's behaviour. I loved it. These moments were mine and I enjoyed them to their fullest.

I learned to fend for myself, without my PA or my Lifestyle Manager. Milan resurrected me; I felt like I had reinvented myself; rewritten my life for a few days. Introspection was necessary; in spite of the fears, the insecurities and the doubts, I managed the entire situation on my own and outside a professional context or my daily routine. It was definitively worth the experience.

This trip was an incontestable success for me, and I could go back to London, light-hearted, proud of myself and wishing for some more soon. Where should I go next?