Chapter Ten
Heartbeat
As the sun came up I could see that Asia was all but done in. I found a safe place for us that could not be easily approached without first alerting us. I pulled several soft needled pine branches down and piled them up on top of each other and then I laid our blankets over top of them.
I lay down and gestured up to her with my hands, “Come here.”
Her tired eyes brightened up with concern, but she came to me. She gasped a little, as I pulled her down beside me and placed her on her side facing away from me. I settled in behind her giving her my arm to lay her head on, as my free hand held her possessively to me. I wanted her so bad!
I sighed into her hair, “You can relax, our deal is still on. You name the time and the place.”
She nodded her head imperceptibly and not long after I felt her breathing ease into sleep.
Her hand settled over top of mine. I swallowed and crammed my eyes shut. She was killing me with her gentle trust, slowly, but surely, like she’d never taken the knife out of my side and was still pressing it deeper!
Asia wasn’t asleep. She wanted to be, because she was so tired, but this was worth staying up for. At first she hadn’t known what to expect. She’d already decided that the two of them had reached the point together that she wouldn’t say no or protest if he went further, but she’d been hoping for a commitment to both her and what she’d asked of him. He had just reaffirmed everything she wanted once again, with his words of keeping with Option B and she felt herself go slack with peace, as she felt how God was working the situation out to her favor.
She was alone with a beast of a man, who had become a guardian to her like no other. The strength of the hand splayed across her middle both claimed her and showed her how safe she was. She let her hand settle over his in acceptance of his ownership. She’d never dreamed of anything like this. Eyes wide open she lay relaxed in peace, as she felt the large body behind her flex and pulse in raw desire for her.
The muscles, in the clenching arm, beneath her ear seemed to grind in the struggle for suppression of both natural and modified desire for her. She should be scared, but she wasn’t anymore, not of him anyway. Other things maybe, but not him the person. He was elemental male at its most extreme, but he was tempered by something finer, which overruled his physical desires.
She was beginning to see that it was going to be a gift from God to be such a man’s woman. What had seemed like a sacrificial, even cursed existence at the time of the deal could now be the implement of change needed to give her far more than her dreams had ever asked for. She fell asleep oddly content on the makeshift bed in complete trust that her man would never hurt her.
She sure was chipper, I acknowledged bitterly. It had gotten so bad that I’d had to roll away from her and do my resting in the dirt beside the comfy pine bed. It was early afternoon and she followed along behind me like an eager Girl Scout anxious to know all there was to know about nature. For someone, who hadn’t talked much before, she sure was bubbly now.
I did my best to answer her endless questions without my sore mood becoming a domineering issue. It wasn’t like I wanted to dissuade her questions about learning of the natural world that I had chosen to make my home in so I tried to be nice. However the conversation eventually turned personal, as it always seemed to do with her.
“You mentioned you had a brother. Do you have any other siblings?”
“No.”
“Are your parents alive?”
“No.”
“Any other family?”
“No.”
“What’s your brother’s name?”
I didn’t answer her and I started to put a little distance on her, when her hand grasped at my arm. I stopped not looking at her, but she came around in front of me. Her words were underscored by the earnestness of her gaze.
“I want to know about you John, please!”
I stared at her for a moment, “His name is James. James Kilroy, but he goes by the codename of Flint. I had a sister once, but she didn’t make it through testing as James and I did. Our parents died in a tornado that leveled our farm never knowing what became of us and beyond that I remember next to nothing else about them other than for the vague way of how my mother looked. I don’t like talking about it and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t ask any more questions on the matter!”
I started to turn away, but her arms closed around my middle tightly.
Awkwardly I held my arms wide, “What are you doing?” I asked
“Giving you a hug.”
“I can see that, but why?”
“Because you didn’t get enough of them growing up.” She said.
I swallowed at that and stood still to the count of thirty, when she finally let me go. We started back out, as I felt defensive roiling emotions roiling back and forth inside of me like I was a wind tossed ship in a storm.
“Since I’m asking all the questions maybe you’d like to ask some about me. If so, fire away.” She volunteered.
I’d had it with everything! I turned savagely on her and she jumped back startled, “I don’t have questions about you, all I want is your body!”
I swung back away from her and instantly all I wanted to do was swear.
“Darn it!” I exploded out with, as I smashed my fist into the trunk of a pine tree, which caused dead pine needles to rain down upon us. My fist hurt, but I didn’t care. I swung back to her, the pain in my hand helping to clear my thoughts.
“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to say that! I know it sounded bad.”
“Yes, you did.” She responded simply.
“Okay so I did, but I shouldn’t have and I’m sorry. I actually want to know all I can about you; it’s just that I’m in a lousy mood right now.”
“You’re forgiven.” She responded simply, as she reached out for my hand and started pulling pine bark fragments out of it. I stared at her lowered head blankly.
“You’re not mad at me?” I asked not sure what to expect at all from this woman.
She looked up into my eyes, “Why would I be?”
“For saying something to hurt you.”
“I told you that I forgave you for that.”
“You not still thinking about it?” I asked.
“No.” She said shaking her head, as she began to smile at me.
I shook my head, “I don’t understand you!”
She just smiled mysteriously and started back out, but she didn’t let go of my hand and oddly I didn’t want her to. We walked that way for a while, until the way became too brushy and she dropped back behind me. I missed the cool touch of her palm and fingers grasping mine. She’d wanted me to ask questions of her and wanting to please her I got busy to thinking about a good one to ask her.
“What is the single greatest achievement of your life to date and breaking into the Code’s mainframe doesn’t count.” I asked.
Without hesitation she responded with, “Helping to lead my father to the saving grace of believing in Jesus Christ before he died.”
I had not been expecting that of all the answers that she could have given me. She was so serious about her faith and her genuineness of zeal struck me once again in a way that I could not ignore. She wasn’t just saying what she did about faith. She truly believed that was her greatest moment in life out of all the award-winning patents she must have been personally involved with. She continued to be an untouched unspoiled wonder to me.
“You were close with your father?”
“Yes.” Softly she added, “They poisoned him when he would not give them what they wanted.”
I had surmised something like that had been the case from what Chantry had said about a mysterious suicide.
“I’m sorry about your mother; no kid should go through that.” I said meaningfully.
“What do you know about my mother?” Asia asked cautiously.
“That she was sent back to your father in pieces. That had to be hard on both of you.”
Asia was quiet for a moment. “She wasn’t a good mother. In fact all she did was give birth to me and nothing more. She only had me so that my father would marry her.”
“That’s a little harsh don’t you think?” I asked feeling her out, more than a little bit curious, as to what was the underlying story.
“My mother was the Code peoples first attempt at getting to my father.” Asia said softly.
I turned back to her in surprise, “She was an enemy plant!”
Asian nodded, “Father knew it from the start, but he wanted me to have a home, so he married her, but guarded against what my mother could see or find out. She had nothing to do with me. She even tried to kill me once, when she grew desperate. They cut her up in pieces, because she failed them, not because my father failed to offer a ransom as some believe.”
It would seem that Asia and I had a lot more in common than I had thought. How did someone turn out so well faced with so many challenges to deal with as a kid? I hadn’t turned out well, so what could explain what she had that I didn’t, which had helped her succeed where I had failed? I glanced back at her and then I decided to stop to ask my question.
“What made you become a Christian?”
She looked thoughtful, as she took the opportunity to rest by sitting down on a boulder. I leaned back against a tree to await her answer.
“The need to know why, I guess, is the best answer. I’m a real geek girl, always have been. I spoke thirty seven languages before I was thirteen and I already knew my way well through all the sciences and math. I was doing my own research and development, but as successful, as a prodigy that I was, the question that echoed over and over in my head was, why? Why did anything exist? Why no matter how finitely I discovered the ways of some path of science did I discover that there was, but another even more complex layer to be discovered under it? I rejected the secular teachings of evolution, as a means to explaining everything. True science and a mere look at the facts that we know of clearly proved that such a theory was both outdated and terribly wrong. Knowing that only left me with a hole to fill. Somebody put together everything I was seeing, but who? I considered all the religions of the world, but none of them spoke my language including Christianity. I asked my father for some time off away to think my way through this, because I felt tormented not knowing why. I felt like I could never truly be me, if I couldn’t understand why that I was. I didn’t need to go to college to learn academia. I went to experience what it was like to be among others, to experience relationship. I thought maybe that would give me a clue into understanding more of what I couldn’t see in the lab. In college I made friends, one of them became my best friend and she was a Christian. I confided in her what I felt torn about inside and she tried to share her faith with me, but Bible stories weren’t enough. Yes, I saw the wisdom of them, but how to make the jump from good sayings to abject faith in something when I still couldn’t answer to myself the question of ‘why’. I really wanted to believe in her Jesus, but what made Him the answer to my ‘why’? She asked me to give her three days to pray about it. Three days went by and she came back to me and asked me to go with her to a museum in Kentucky based on a Biblical framework of science and history. I went with her. Do you know what they teach there? They teach the science behind why you should believe God is who He is by what He has already done and left for all to see. I’d been seeing His work for years and now I could read why everything was and why I was and what my purpose was. Faith made sense, because now I could see beyond a doubt as to who to give the credit to. Knowing who God is isn’t enough though. My experience in college taught me the importance of relationship and what I read only made me see how important it was to have a relationship with my Creator. His very work made me yearn to experience life with Him so that I could see even more, as to what He had done already on display all around me. My friend brought me to the saving knowledge and faith in Jesus and what He did for me on the cross in my dorm room a week later. Life has never been the same and I will never be the same. My God answered my question of ‘why’ through the language of science and the facts that supported it. My purpose was so that I might know how much He loved me so that I could worship and love Him in perfect relationship for forever. So that’s why I am a Christian. God spoke my language and showed me love and I found my God ordained purpose by being in Him and so I serve my life trusting in Him the Author and Finisher of all things.”
I shook my head softly, “You should have been a motivational speaker Asia. It’s a good story and it explains a lot about you.”
I turned back to the game trail we were on, but she soon caught up with me and asked the question I knew she would. The little Asian chick couldn’t wait to save me.
“So what about you? What do you believe?” She asked breathlessly, as she tried to keep up with me.
I decided to be honest with her, “I believe there is a God, but He hates me and I hate Him in return. End of story.”
I heard her gasp, but she didn’t say anything. That was surprising. I glanced back to see her looking contemplative.
Curious, I couldn’t refrain from asking, “So what’s the verdict, still gonna try to save me?”
“Absolutely!” She said without hesitation.
“What’s your strategy?” I asked.
“Well, you already have faith; you just need relationship to go with it.”
“Good luck with that honey! My brothers already tried everything in the Good Book, in order to save me from my wicked ways and he’s come up empty time and time again.”
“Is he as pretty as I am?”
I gave her a quick look. She had such a confident smile on that I couldn’t break through to read her thoughts.
“Are you going to try to sensually entice me into joining the ranks of Christianity, because that strategy has a real possibility of success?”
Her smile deepened, but remained cryptic in regards to her thoughts. She spoke, “Honey, I’m not going to be the one to save you, God is. I’m just along to help and be useful wherever He might have a part for me to play.”
Her confidence of my defeat was annoying, so I ignored her for the next several hours. It was getting on towards evening, when I saw the sentry. The sentry, not much older than a boy, saw us at the same moment and reacted out of sheer startlement by bring up a rifle and firing.
I felt the bullet smack into my side and then burn away past me, then I heard it impact with Asia. I wheeled around in horror to see her white faced and clutching at her shoulder. Screaming in rage I turned on the boy and closed the distance between us in several bounds my sword lifted high to hack him into pieces. The boy screamed and dropped the rifle and fell to the ground in abject fright of me.
“No!!! Please don’t hurt the boy!” Boomed out a voice off to my right.
I hesitated only long enough to catalog the new threat, which revealed itself as an aging black man, who appeared unarmed. My sword lifted higher.
“John don’t!” Asia spoke out from behind me.
My blade was poised to descend upon the quivering boy at my feet, as I glanced back at Asia. She was leaning back against a tree with a hand pressed to her shoulder, as her face was twisted up with pain.
“Don’t do it John.”
I saw her start to fall and I dropped the sword, as I rushed to her side. She was unconscious, I quickly felt at the wound. Blood was everywhere and I pressed a rag against the wound to try to stop it. Feeling under her I searched for the exit wound. There wasn’t one. I swore hard.
The old black man was kneeling beside me, “We have a surgeon in our camp! We need to get her there!”
Quickly, he helped me tie a makeshift pressure bandage over the wound. I swung her up into my arms and started to follow after the man, only to stop briefly beside the boy, who still lay on the ground shaking.
“So help me, if she dies I’ll finish the job I started with you!” I said, before I hurried on after the older man leaving the boy to cry on the forest floor.
We broke out of the forest into a clearing made up of makeshift shacks huddled around an old stately looking farmhouse. The older man called out orders to surprised looking individuals that came popping out of everywhere.
The man seemed to be something of a leader in this little community. He led me straight for the house holding the door open for me. I passed through it careful not to hit Asia’s head on the doorpost. The man directed me to a room and I stepped into it. The room was obviously set up for medical purposes. I had no sooner entered the room then a clean-shaven man of about forty with Doctor written all over him stepped into the room followed by a woman with all the practicality of a nurse in her bearing.
“Put her here on the table.” The Doctor said.
I laid Asia down and they lost no time, but showed their experience in how they coordinated together at cutting away the bandage and shirt in order to examine the wound. It was a small clean hole, probably made by a small caliber bullet such as a 22.
They rolled her onto her side, as the doctor felt at her back, “I feel it!”
The nurse sterilized the area and then the Doctor split the skin with a scalpel. More of my Asia’s blood dripped down to stain the table red. My hands tightened into fists at the sight of it. A hand squeezed my shoulder and I glanced to the side to see the black man there. I shrugged his grasp off and went back to watching the Doctor. The man didn’t seem to be offended, but continued to stand beside me.
“Got it!” The Doctor said pulling a small smashed up, but intact looking bullet from the wound.
The piece of lead tinkled loudly into the little pan that he dropped it in, as he continued digging into the incision on the back of Asia’s shoulder. My temper began to rise. What was he doing? Couldn’t he see she was bleeding out? He pulled something else out of the wound with a pair of tweezers.
The nurse quickly took it from him and stretched out Asia’s shirt and pressed out the bloody patch onto the hole in the shirt.
“It fits!” She said.
“Good, let’s get her closed up and an IV started.” The Doctor said.
They moved quickly and expertly in doing just that and I began to relax inside. The Doctor left off and the nurse took over.
The older man beside me spoke deeply, “Steve, he needs some attention too.”
I glanced down to see the small puddle of blood on the floor. I had completely forgotten about being hit first by the bullet. I couldn’t care less about my wound. The Doctor pulled my shirt up and inspected the wound. He glanced up at me and then over at Asia. “Minor miracle here Eli.” The Doctor said.
“How so?” Asked the man beside me curiously.
“The bullet hit him first, which stole most of its energy, but more than that hitting his rib deflect the bullet slightly off course. It would’ve cut a major artery otherwise and the bullet would’ve smashed off the bone and likely ping-ponged around inside of her, if it hadn’t first hit him.”
“That isn’t a small miracle by any means Steve.” The man called Eli said.
The Doctor smiled, “I guess not.”
“Is she going to be okay?” I asked breaking into the conversation.
“She’s lost a lot of blood, but the bullet doesn’t seem to have amounted to any major internal damage, so I think with some rest and recovery she’ll be absolutely fine. Betty, when you’re done there can you clean and stitch this up?”
The nurse quickly nodded.
Steve smiled at me, “Sorry I have to skip out like this, but I’ve got two sets of twins trying to beat each other out.”
I nodded in understanding, as he passed by me out the door. The nurse came to me and I held my shirt up for her, as she worked on my side. She was very proficient and soon had me stitched up. I let my shirt down, but she hadn’t moved away. Her steady hands and demeanor were gone.
Her fingers shaking she brushed away a tear unable to meet my eyes with hers, “I’m so sorry! I……”
“Your son?” I asked.
She nodded.
“Send him by later. I’d like to have a little talk with him.”
She nodded and left the room. I turned towards the man still by my side.
“Are you the leader here?” I asked.
He shrugged expressively, “Some look to me for guidance.”
“Can we stay until she’s better?”
“I wouldn’t hear of anything else!” He exclaimed.
“I can’t pay you anything.”
“No payment is required. Now why don’t you sit down over there and take a load off your feet and I’ll send you in some food.”
He left then and closed the door behind him. I waited a moment before approaching the bed. Asia’s color had improved drastically. I leaned down and pressed my ear to her chest relaxing as I felt the steady beat of her heart. I went to the other side of her and sat down heavily on a cot. I reached up to hold her hand and lean my forehead against the table. This had been much too close a thing.
The man called Eli was back with a tray of food. The plate was piled high with food, including a steak. I looked up questioningly at him and he gave a deep belly laugh.
“Only the kind that moos.” He responded still chuckling.
I dug into the food. It was good and I felt myself unwind some and I started to talk with Eli, who sat across from me. I liked the man and I felt at ease with him, as I rarely did with strangers or even those I knew.
There was a knock on the door before it opened. The boy was standing there with his mother. Haltingly he stepped into the room towards me. The first thing he did was hand me my sword. I took it back from him and studied it for a moment before glancing at Asia. It really had been an accident, nothing malicious intended. I turned the sword end for end and handed it back to the boy. The boy’s eyes widened drastically at the offered gift.
“Take it and keep your mother safe. You can go now.”
The boy took the sword, but looked around as if he couldn’t believe it.
He glanced at Asia and swallowed, “That’s all you have to say to me for what I did?”
I looked up at him, “What do you want me to say? You’re not going to fall asleep on sentry duty again are you?”
“No Sir!”
“I didn’t think so and it looks like you’ve put yourself through enough hell without me adding any so let’s leave it at that and move on.”
The boy managed to whisper out, “Thank you Sir.” Before he backed out of the room and closed the door.
Eli spoke up, “You made him a better young man just now and for that I thank you. Many can speak a hard thing and tear down, but few can actually build others up by speaking just plain ordinary words.”
There was a period of silence between us then, which Eli broke. “Is she important?” He asked.
I thought about it for a moment. “I guess you could say that she’s humanity’s last great chance at freedom.”
Eli nodded, as if he had suspected as much. His eyes seemed to bore into me. “But that is not why she is important to you is it? Tell me is she your wife?”
“She’s mine!” I responded firmly.
He seemed to accept the answer. “You should rest now. I’ll keep watch over her and wake you if you’re needed.” Eli said.
I was tired, especially after eating all the food that I had. I lay down on the cot, but sleep eluded me. It had always been hard to sleep ever since…… I opened my eyes, it wasn’t good to remember. I glanced over to see Eli reading something by candlelight. I sat up and his eyes drifted over to me.
“Is that a Bible?” I asked.
He nodded.
“You a preacher?”
“I am.” He affirmed.
I’d suspected as much. I stood up and moved toward the door, but stopped before I went through it.
“If you don’t mind I think she’d enjoy it if you were to read out loud. She draws comfort and meaning from those words.” I said before I started out the door.
“And what meaning do you have for her?” Eli asked deeply.
I stopped briefly, “I’m the man who’s supposed to be keeping her safe from all harm.” I said bitterly before stalking away into the night.
Eli stared at the closed door for a moment, as his finger tapped on his Bible. The man was hard to read. There was anger and perhaps even shame in his cloaked demeanor that he used to shield some private pain. There was also confusion to be sure and Eli stretched out a hand toward the door and prayed out against the spirit of confusion that he felt twisting the young man up inside. That done he turned back to the table and the beautiful patient that lay upon it.
He had a very good feeling about her. He glanced at the door, as he again remembered the big warrior’s request for the woman that he had claimed as his own. A smile touched Eli’s lips; the proper application of sweet honey always did catch more flies. He pulled his chair closer to the bed and picked up from where he had been reading in Psalms. Psalms was always a good book of the Bible to read, when one was in need of comfort. Eli’s deep voice filled the room with a resonating melody, as he read the Scriptures he’d read countless times before to his silent witness.
I watched the exact moment she came awake. She moaned and felt at her shoulder. Her eyes traced around the room and landed on me. I swallowed the chunk of apple I had been chewing on.
“How are you feeling?” I asked.
“Like I’ve been shot. Are there more of those?” She asked looking at my half eaten apple covetously.
“Covetousness is a sin.” I said with good humor.
Her lips curved, “So you have read the Bible!”
“Bits and pieces come back to me now and then I admit.”
I helped prop her up and she reached for my apple. I smacked her hand away playfully. “Stealing is a sin too.”
“But I’m hungry!” She exclaimed piteously.
“So that makes it all right then?” I asked leadingly.
She rolled her eyes at me and I chuckled, as I reached for a bowl on a nearby table.
“What’s that?” She asked suspiciously.
I couldn’t help but admit how darned cute she was. I got a spoonful and pushed it in past her reluctant lips. Her face brightened and her lips closed around the spoon, quite taking my breath away in the process.
“Applesauce!” She exclaimed.
“Yeah.”
I fed her spoonful after spoonful with her smiling at me all along. With a speculative gleam in her eyes she stated, “Your brother’s named James and your John. Your mother named you for the apostles?”
“Just my brother.” I admitted grudgingly.
Her brow knitted up in concentration, “Then who?
The light of comprehension dawned brightly in her eyes, “John the Baptist?”
I nodded and she started giggling. I gave her a dark look, but kept feeding her, just glad inside that she was okay. So what if she was having fun on my account, I still had her, which meant that my world was still okay for now.
“What’s your middle name?” She asked inquisitively.
I didn’t answer.
“Ferdinand?” She asked teasingly.
I gave her a dark look again. She took another bite and then I saw the sudden thought hit her and I groaned inwardly.
“No, she couldn’t have!”
“Oh yes she did.” I affirmed remorsefully.
“Baptist?”
I nodded.
She laughed hard then and I did my best to bare it out as best as I could. It was a terrible name, especially for somebody like me, John Baptist Kilroy. I would never forgive my parents for it. Sourly, I set the bowl down in her lap and handed her the spoon. She made a real effort to stop laughing then and grabbed a hold of my arm.
“No don’t go! I’m sorry for laughing! Please stay!”
I stayed in the room.
In all we stayed at the little haven in the woods for two weeks, while Asia made a full recovery.