1
But today, Annie's thoughts had turned down another avenue. This one had opened up because of the memory of her late husband. A couple of years before his death they had decided to sell the farm, lock, stock and barrel and to move into the town. They were both getting older and wanted to be sure that they were in easier reach of the doctors, especially as Robert had not be in good health for several years. They had bought themselves a three storey house overlooking the sea. The sounds of the water ebbing to and fro gave them a feeling of tranquility and peacefulness for their advancing years. If they were woken up during the night, just listening to the sounds of the sea lapping against the sandy shore, was enough to be lulled back into peaceful slumber.
Again as Annie gazed out over the sea she found herself staring down at someone who seemed very familiar to her. She couldn't believe her eyes. She quickly snatched up her door keys, wrapped her warm coat around her and stepped out of the front door. Making sure that there was no traffic coming down the main street, she crossed over to the sea front. With rapid footsteps she approached the familiar man. “Excuse me, but I saw you from my window and you looked so familiar to me that I have had to come to speak to you to really find out who I think you are.”
He turned towards her. “Even though I cannot see your face, I would know that voice even if we were surrounded by many other voices. Annie, my true love. I can tell by the air around us that I have taken you by surprise. But please do not fear, I have not come here today to frighten you, but perhaps we could go somewhere a little more private and quiet to talk, maybe?”
“Yes, but of course. I only live across the road from here, we can sit and talk for as long as we like. But I cannot get over seeing you like this. At first I thought that I must be dreaming. Then of course I realised that it was daytime and that you had to be real. Now, I think that we should talk. Please would you care to come with me?” Annie felt quite calm outwardly, but inside her she was in turmoil.
“May I take you arm, it helps to guide me immensely when I am in a strange town. Although I should know the lay of the land around here,” saying this he smiled at her.
Annie gently took his arm and threaded it through hers and guided him across the road back to her home. Once inside she quickly made tea and joined him in the lounge. He seemed to her to look a little uncomfortable, perhaps it was because the surroundings were strange to him. She soon put him at ease as she told him about the town and how that very little had changed over the years. The main thing which was new was the pavilion, which had been built along the sea front only two years back. It had been the councils decision to try and bring more younger families to the town for holidays. During the daytime it held games for the young children and then in the evenings they had various entertainment programmes, from amateur dramatics to disco nights. Finally their talk turned to the night when he and several of his squadron hadn't returned from the midnight flight over to France. William began to tell her of that dreadful night.
2
Slowly at first he describe how they had parachuted in and landed exactly as they had planned back in the barracks, but it was as they had met with their contacts that they came under attack. Many of the men ran back to the shore in the hopes that the boats had managed to get close enough to pick them up. Like a few of his men he was amongst those who got wounded, but he managed crawl into one of the many sand dunes and in great pain from the wound in his leg and a numbness which was by then gathering in his face, he covered himself up with the sand. He prayed that he would not be found. Many stories had been told of those who had become prisoners of war and of the treatment which was given out to those men who were found stranded.
“Next morning I was woken by something scrabbling away at the sand. Not daring to breath in case it gave me away, I tried to hold my breath as long as I could. But with only a thin covering I was soon discovered. At first I was blinded by the light which seemed to bear down on me with such intensity, then as if a switch had been flicked the light went out and I was left in a blurred darkness. A voice came to me through this darkness, it was a voice which I had only heard on the telephone back at the headquarters. But I didn't want to give anything away, so I pretended that I couldn't understand what it was they were saying, giving only my name rank and number as we had been trained to do. I must have drifted off, as the next thing that I remember was being carried along on some sort of stretcher. I couldn't get used to the darkness which seemed to be a constant companion.” William broke off from telling his story. A haunted look was now on his face. “Can I please have another drink, this is something which I have not told to anyone for a long time and I am afraid that the recollections of those days still touch me very badly.”
Annie was saddened by his look. “If this is too hard for you to tell, please do not go on. Even though I truly would like to know where and what you have been doing all these years, I cannot tell you how much it pains me to see the hurt which stretches across your face.”
“My dear thoughtful Annie. You haven't changed, I can tell by the sweetness of your voice. Just listening to you makes my heart leap with happiness. How I have longed to just hear you and to touch your hand. But what you must have thought all those years ago and the hurt that my disappearance must have caused you. I cannot even think of that without my heart breaking just a little more. But I must tell you of my years away from here. In the hope that in the telling of this, that you can try to forgive me for not returning to you.” William took a deep breath before continuing.
3
“After several days of drifting in and out of consciousness I finally awoke. I was now even more confused about where I was. But I desperately needed a drink and after managing to call out, I then heard that familiar voice. But this time I knew that it was one of the contacts we had been sent over to meet. Her name was Collette and she was a member of the resistance. She told me that the wound had been more serious than what I had originally thought. It had become infected and the original numbness which I had felt in my face had been because the bullet had hit a nerve. They had been able to remove the bullet but the nerve had been permanently damaged. This was the reason why I couldn't see. I had been blinded. Something which was very difficult for me to come to terms with at first. As you know one of my past-times had been painting, but now this was not going to be possible for me to do again. I felt bitter. Why me, I wanted to shout aloud. My next thought was that I would never see your smiling face again and from what I started to find out over the next few weeks I then wondered whether you would even want to see me. My only way of seeing was to use my hands. I wanted to regain some of my independence and I started by washing and shaving myself again. I was not at first very successful with this as I kept cutting myself. But taking it slowly I soon got use to navigating about my face. It was then that I noticed that my left side drooped quite a bit and that of my left eye as well. What as sight I must looked, so I then decided that I would stop shaving and grow a beard to hide the ugliness. Shame on me, there were many many more people out there in much more degrees of war torn injuries than mine. Another reminder was time, this meant very little to me as well. Months passed me by as I wallowed in my own self pity. It was now well over a year that I had been missing, probably presumed dead, but I had in fact gone awol. But I was not in a hurry to be found, and I didn't care one way or another what anybody thought. The war was now over, but for me it would never be. The war had taken so much away from me, your love for me was the main one. But I couldn't return back to England.”
After saying all this William bowed his head, he didn't want Annie to see that what he was now telling her had made him ashamed of being so selfish, when there had been others who undoubtedly had been in similar situations and had been able to come to terms and to deal with them. “Please William look at me. Don't ever think that I am thinking of you in any other way than that I still care for you. There had been a time when I thought that you had taken an easy way out of becoming my husband. But I knew you too well for that. So there was only one other explanation, and it was one which my mind desperately wanted to discard. I will say that it did take me a long very long time to come to terms with and sometimes when I think of Robert, my late husband, I now realise that I must have put him through hell with my constant changes in moods. Because I did at one time think that I should become a recluse. Now that I am saying this I know that I was being unkind to myself and to the memory of how we had once loved each other.”
Annie let out a sigh. She leant forwards and placed a tender kiss on his cheek. “Maybe it would be a good idea for us to start afresh tomorrow in telling each other of what we have done over these many years apart. Tonight we are both getting tired, we are both not as young as we once were. And tomorrow we will not be afraid as we have been today. Would you care to call here again in the morning or maybe I can call for you at your hotel?” Annie asked.
Having said that he would be grateful if she would come for him, he left her standing on her doorstep and set off to walk the short distance back to his hotel. He wanted a little fresh air, he had the feeling of being swallowed up by the darkness, just like he had first felt when he knew that he had lost his sight. He hoped that the cool breeze would help him to clear his mind and help him to relax before he retired to his room for the night.
They both knew that what had transpired this day would give them both many hours to think about.
As daylight came pouring through the curtains, if was followed by a gentle breeze from the partly opened window. Annie felt that this was a day that was sure to bring more surprises but also a day that would be full of memories, some good and some bad, from both of their pasts and now that they had once again become friends, she hoped that it would be full of future promises of joy.
After a quick shower she dressed in a pair of casual trousers, which she topped by a deep blue coloured blouse, which set off the blue of her eyes, she was then ready to go and meet with William. Making good time to the hotel she was just parking the car when she saw William standing on the steps of the hotel. She decided to go straight up to the steps and after saying good morning and letting him take her arm, she led him to the open car door.
“It is such a very refreshing morning. My mind is so full of everything which I want to tell you, that it feels as though it is going to burst. Does that sound silly to you my dear?” William looked over towards the driver's seat where Annie was seated.
“No it doesn't. This morning there was a breeze which was blowing in through my open window and I could feel myself becoming awash with all my thoughts and emotions. Last night there were many thoughts flitting here and there in my head which gave a feeling of being trapped, but that was because we were both so afraid of what we were thinking of each other. Today all that will be changed.” Now that Annie had become used to seeing him again she took their friendship a step further and kissed him tenderly on his cheek. Smiling she set off driving them back to her house and to the happy feeling of spending the day with him.
4
The morning passed by quickly and as they sat around her dining table slowly eating the lunch that she had prepared, their talk continued about all that had happened. William continued, “as I said Collette had taken care of me for many weeks and I grew to depend on her. I still had some of my eyesight at first, but as my body regained its strength, my sight began to fade, until one morning when I awoke, it was to the perpetual darkness that I now take for granted. Collette's home was on a vineyard. It was the home of her late parents and she had stayed on because of the vines. She knew which of the grapes were the best for all of the wines,which were also made and sold on to the local people. The vineyard is still going today, but now their wines are shipped to various countries and are quite well known for the distinctive flavour of the area. One of the wines, a ruby red with a seductive damson taste has now been given an award. I think it was partly because of the vineyard as well, that also played a part on my not returning. In the morning air a myriad of smells came to me. I had always been good at distinguishing smells, but this had grown more acute after my sight had gone. Now I could smell the freshly turned land, which on a damp morning took on the smell from an underground chamber, which seemed to cleanse your mind, like raindrops on dry leaves. ” William held out his hand to her and as she placed hers he closed his other hand around it. “I can picture your face, bright lively eyes shining from your radiant face. This image of you makes me feel young and in need of excitement. Do you think that we are too old for such ideas as this?” William asked her.
“I have the feeling that we will never be too old to take this opportunity which has been given to us. I say that we should take advantage of every moment that we have. There have been too many years apart to think of what we may not get. I hope that you are going to be staying here. I could even help you find a flat, there are so many these days, because many of the larger houses have been converted into self contained apartments. The upkeep of the large houses became too much for many of the owners, that they have been sold off to management companies willing to transform the properties, and at the same time the companies can make a lot of money out of renting them.” Annie hoped that he would agree to this, but there again did he really want to stay here she wondered.
“That sounds like a very good idea. I can tell that some things have changed here. The repairs that some of the guys did on the church, have they been able to live up to the many years of weather changes?”
Annie nodded her head and said, “they did up until about three years ago when we had one almighty storm one evening that tore up the high street and stripped off many on the roofs in its path as it burst on by. The church took a battering, but it was the roof once again, that caught the worst of it. This time they had to call in the roofers, which was very costly. But like many things, the locals turned out and held dances, tea afternoons and sponsored runs and generated a lot of the money to pay for the repairs in this way. The church itself said that as the funds were low, the repairs would have to wait. Money was needed for something else. But we never found out what the something else was. I think that it was their way of getting out of signing a cheque. Not a very Christian thing to say, but many of us know that it is the truth. The church has taken a drop in the amount of people who attended these day. But I believe that there will always be some families who will be true to the faith of the church ”
There was a pleasant quietness for some time. Both of them were engaged in their own memories of that other time. William gave a nervous cough and said, “I have something to tell you and I hope that you are not going to be angry with me and also with the person I am now going to mention.” She couldn't tell by the look on William's face whether it was something she did want to hear. But he carried on, “ I am afraid that I have not been completely honest with you. For over a year now I have been in contact with Freda. I asked her to keep our correspondence a secret from you. I wanted to be the first to actually see you, that is feel your closeness to me. She told me only a little about you and the way your life had turned out, because there again I wanted to hear everything from you first hand. I did at one point want her to warn you that I was going to come over, but there I go again, I wanted to be sure in my own mind that what I was proposing to do was something which would not hurt you, as you had already been hurt badly by me once before.”
Annie's whole body had become tense. Freda had never given any clue as to that she had known about William and where he was. Her mouth and lips felt dry, she needed a drink. Excusing herself, she went to the drinks cabinet, even though the hour was still early, she poured herself a generous amount of whisky and on second thoughts, she then carefully poured William one too. This was obviously something which was as painful to him as it was to her. “William, I don't know what to say, other than that I am very glad that you did decide to come to me first. My initial reaction to this news was that I wanted to close my ears and to blank out what you were saying. But then, we have missed so much of what could, or could not have been, with our years apart. Let us now start to enjoy what we can now do.”
“You don't know how happy you have just made me. Oh my darling, how I have wanted to hold you, to kiss your soft lips and to hear your gay laughter. Do you know, I've just had a thought. There used to be a restaurant which was quite expensive, and I always said to myself, one day I will take Annie there, and you know what, tonight I am going to do just that.” He leaned over and took old of her face, and ever so tenderly kissed her. Although many years had gone by, she still felt the same to him, young and full of energy. But he must also remind himself that they were not the same two people of that long ago time, they had both lived different lives and in different countries.
After saying that he would make the booking at the restaurant, he said goodbye to her and made his way back up the high street. The town seemed to be bustling with activity and striding out as if he had lived here all his life, he counted his footsteps so that he knew where his turnings were. He had learnt to do this from the beginning of him going blind. He had been given a guide dog, Sheba, who had been his eyes for over 13 years, but like him she had grown older and now she herself had become a victim as her eyes had now dimmed, so now she had become his companion, mainly sitting by his feet and giving him a feeling of reassurance that he was not alone, that someone was beside him if he did have an accident. He had put in for a new dog, but there was a long waiting list, but he was not in a hurry. Time for him had now slowed down and with all the things that he was now planning to do, a new dog was not a priority, there were many more people out there who's needs were greater than his.
But now his footsteps had become more sure of the ground he was walking on. He strode out with a purpose, making his way to the well remember restaurant. As he walked along the cobbled street, he thought back to another time when he had taken Annie to a restaurant. It had been for her birthday. He had been able to book a table and they had had a wonderful meal and the manager had made a special cake for her. William arrived at the restaurant and asked if they had a table free for that evening. Unfortunately they were fully booked and so William made a reservation for the following evening. He asked for a special table for them, somewhere a little out of the way of other diners. After saying goodbye he made his way back to the hotel. It was only a very short distance and the refreshing air gave him a feeling of gladness that he had finally chosen to make to the journey back here and to confront all his old fears of what Annie had thought of his disappearance.
5
The hotel he was staying in had been very good to him and had volunteered the services of one of the chambermaids, she would look after his faithful dog when he wasn't in they had told him. Of course he had made sure that both his cherished hound and the young girl took to each other, the last thing that he wanted was to be given any cause that would mean him loosing Sheba. After enquiring at the reception desk if all had been OK with Sheba, but just before he did leave the reception desk, he asked to have a call to be put through to Annie where he let her know that a table had been booked for the next evening. He then took the lift up to the 4th floor and after walking passed three other rooms he opened the door to his room. He was greeted immediately by the sound of thumping from the wagging tail. “Well hello there Sheba, I hope that you have been having a good day. I am full of news for you, but first, let me make sure that we are both refreshed with drinks and a treat for you.” William busied himself for a short while and once he was satisfied that Sheba was comfortable, her arthritis was getting bad these days. He then started to tell her all about Annie. He had never felt foolish when he was talking to his dog, she was after all his eyes and ears to watch and listen out for dangers from the traffic. But she was also his companion.
He felt her head snuggle down onto his feet and he continued on. I can tell that Annie will love you instantly, because I know now that without a doubt that the two of us, let me rephrase that, the three of us are going to be together for as long as we have left. He reached down and tickled Sheba behind her ear and said, I think we both deserve an early night and then tomorrow we shall both be ready to meet up and talk about our future. Before long he felt his eyelids drooping but he had very little resistance to the encroaching sleep which soon took him over. Hours later he awoke with a stiff neck and a chill around his shoulders. Feeling down towards the carpet he sought out the familiar form of his dog, she too had fallen asleep at his feet, but as soon as she realised that he was awake she stood and stretched out her legs and caught on to his sleeve to show him the way to the bathroom. You needn't worry yourself, I can easily find my way around in here. Go on back to sleep as we shall be up in next to no time. I can tell that the stars are starting to fade, to bring in the morning light.