CUSTOMS & TRADITIONS
People outside of the Indian culture may wonder about Indian traditions.
Below are some of these traditions from the author’s perspective and although told as accurately as possible the author takes no responsibility as to their authenticity.
These beliefs are from rich ingrained philosophies that have spanned thousands of years, coming from a culture filled with many customs and values.
Some may be considered old wives tales but are generally there to teach good morals and principles.
These few notes show how these beliefs have stood the test of time.
NICKNAMES:
When an Indian baby is born, they’re often given a nickname, such as Pinky, Bubbly, Muppy or Bunty. One reason for this could be because the birth name given to the child did not seem to fit a tiny, cute baby. The other reason is that it often takes some time before a priest is consulted and comes back with a suggestion of a suitable name for the child, so the parents nickname the baby in the meantime, one that will often stick.
SACRED COWS:
Cows are extremely important to Hindus and because of this Hindus do not eat beef. Cows are like a ‘Mother’ and babies drink their Mothers milk, we as humans also drink cow’s milk. Therefore, Hindus cannot understand why humans slaughter and eat their Mother.
SIKHISM:
Sikhism is a religion originating from Punjab. Sikh men wear a turban because as is their custom ‘to wear a turban is like wearing a crown from god.’ It’s a courageous act to wear a turban, to stand out from the crowd, because it shows a Sikh’s true devotion to Sikhism and their god. Sikh men never cut their hair - subsequently their long hair is wound and bound around the long cloth then neatly tucked around the head to make the turban.
YOGHURT:
Ingredients:
One tablespoon plain natural yoghurt (culture)
One litre milk
Bring to the boil one litre of milk, don’t let it boil over, leave it in the pot and let it cool. Have a clean jar or container ready with an airtight lid. Once the milk has cooled pour it into the jar. Add a tablespoon of yoghurt (culture). Quickly store the container in a warm dry place overnight (twelve hours). The next morning you will have yoghurt.
FIJIAN-INDIANS:
In 1879, British colonials living in India sent people from India to Fiji to work in the sugarcane fields. Some of these people were bought as slaves and some went there on their own free will as labourers with a promise of a great life living on a tropical island. The Indian people who went to Fiji worked hard in the fields and after five years were offered a journey back to India for a reduced fare. Because the Indian people were farmers/labourers they could not afford the reduced fare so they were offered an alternative – to stay in Fiji and buy a plot of cheap land. Most of them took this option and built a house as they had become accustomed to the Fijian way of life, some of them were married and had children of their own born in Fiji. These people were now known as Indo-Fijians and had integrated into the Fijian way of life, yet still tried to keep their own culture alive: their language, religion, traditions and festivals.
FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS:
Relationships are more complex in Hindi. Each relation in the family is addressed by their own special name. In English we know our relatives as Aunty, Uncle, Grandma or Grandpa, which is the same for both sides of the family. In Hindi, each separate relationship has a name and each person on each side of the family has their own title. The Grandpa on the Fathers side of the family is called Dada and Grandma is Dadi. The Grandpa on the Mothers side is called Nana and the Grandma is known as Nani. For example: Julie, Ranjini and Saras's older brother’s fiancé – then wife, is called Bhabhi. Kishore being Ranjini and Saras's older brother is called Bhaiya.
GOLD:
Giving gold to someone began many years ago when it was decided it was not safe to keep money in your house. Instead, people exchanged their money for gold as gold could be worn at all times. Over the years, the giving of gold in Indian tradition has become more and more extravagant, with the gold being passed down to the eldest sons wife, generation after generation. In extremely wealthy families the bride is draped in elaborate gold necklaces, earrings, bracelets, ankles, head gear and a nose ring.
After the wedding the jewellery is kept in a safe in the brides home because it’s too intricate and heavy to wear on a daily basis and is only taken out, worn and displayed on special occasions.
RANGOLI:
The rangoli is an ancient sign – an equilateral cross with its arms bent at right angles. To Hindus the rangoli is second only to the most important symbol, which is the OM symbol, meaning ‘may god prevail.’ Similar in importance as the cross is to Christians. The name ‘swastika,' in fact, comes from Sanskrit (the first written language of Hindus) and is a sign of peace. The Nazi swastika looks almost identical but is turned slightly on a different angle. It’s said that the German Nazi party stole this symbol from the Hindus and changed it slightly for their own means.
AMITABH BACHCHAN:
A book could not be written about India without mentioning this famous man. In 1982 while filming a huge Bollywood movie called ‘Coolie,' Amitabh Bachchan was near fatally injured while performing a fight scene. He spent many months in hospital after receiving a splenic (stomach) rupture when jumping into the corner of a table in the middle of a stunt. During his recovery, he became even more revered by his adoring fans. Millions of them prayed for him to get well with candlelight vigils. Some begged god to take their limb if it would result in the survival of their hero. Eventually, when the movie ‘Coolie’ was released in 1983, it was a huge success. The scene where Amitabh Bachchan was injured was frozen with an explanation displayed on the screen telling fans what happened to him. Many years later Amitabh Bachchans son, Abhishek, married the most beautiful Bollywood actress and model Aishwarya Rai who was crowned Miss India World then Miss World both in 1994.
SARIS:
Why do Indian women wear saris? The word sari comes from Sanskrit meaning ‘strip of cloth.’ Saris were known to be worn as far back as Moughal times, according to ancient paintings, possibly 100 B.C. but it’s really unknown how far back the history goes, as there are so few historical records about them. Legend states the original length of cloth that is a sari was left unstitched and uncut as it was as pure as the woman wearing it.
The short blouse (choli) deliberately leaves the midriff bare because ‘The navel is considered to be the source of life and creativity.’ The whole outfit is put on in such a way to highlight and enhance the bust and hips as they are regarded as very seductive and elegant.
BRIDE & GROOM WALK AROUND THE FIRE:
The walks around the fire represent the 'walk of life' of the couple as they enter into marriage. The amount of times they walk can vary in different areas of India, sometimes it’s seven although it’s usually five.
The priest pronounces marital vows and with each loop the bride and groom repeat after him.
Another important part of a Hindu ceremony are the seven steps, with each step promises are made to each other for their marriage, these steps are either part of the walks around the fire or a different part of the ceremony:
CHILLIES:
Chillies are believed to ward off evil spirits from your house, so hang a necklace of red chillies above your front door.
OFFERINGS:
When living or travelling in India, or when visiting an Indian persons home you’re always treated as an honoured guest. When you’re offered a cup of tea it’s polite to say ‘No, please don’t go to any trouble.’ Even if you want a cup of tea you still say no. The person offering the cup of tea will insist and you still say no. You both know the host will bring you a cup of tea anyway. To say ‘no’ is to be polite in Indian culture. You actually know they will bring you a cup of tea regardless. To tell them you do not want them to go to any trouble is considered good manners.
MILK/ALMONDS:
You often hear an Indian Mother or Father saying to their children - 'Come child and drink your milk and eat your almonds.’ The almonds will have had the brown outer skin taken off which is achieved by soaking them overnight in water, making them easier to peel. Almonds contain many vitamins but it’s also believed that they’re good for brain development and will help the child to become more intelligent. The milk is always warmed and is known to be full of calcium for healthy teeth and bones.
BURI NAZAR:
You may have noticed Indian babies have a little black dot on their ear or somewhere on their face. This is not to be confused with the bhindi - a decorative sticker worn for ornamental purposes only (like make up or jewellery) on the forehead between the eyes.
The little black dot of khol or black eyeliner is applied by the Mother to her baby just before guests arrive or when she takes the baby out of the house. It’s believed that the little black dot chases away the ‘evil eye’ called ‘buri nazar.'
The meaning behind this is, when you look at a baby you might mention how cute and adorable it is and tradition states that a bad spirit may hear those positive words spoken to the child and decide to do something nasty to it. Therefore, the black spot placed on the baby’s face or behind its ear, is a barrier to ward off the evil spirit. For the Mother it’s a guard, a protector for the baby. The black spot may also be a protector against you, the initiator of the bad spirit - you may have thoughts of wanting a baby as cute as that one. Of course this is not intentional on your part but for you to even compliment the baby maybe enough for the bad spirit to take action. The black spot will guard the baby against all kinds of negative thoughts.
BLACK EYELINER:
A Mother applies black eyeliner around their baby's (boy or girl) eyes in the same way a woman applies eyeliner. This eyeliner is called kajal (also a girls name). It’s used for medicinal purposes to make the eyes strong and healthy. This eyeliner is made out of khol, (a natural product) and was also used by ancient Egyptians, the most famous being Cleopatra.
HONEY:
When a baby is born into an Indian family, the first thing to be put into its mouth is a little dab of honey in order to clear its lungs or stomach of any mucus as the baby begins its life outside the womb.
FORTY DAYS:
After having a baby an Indian woman traditionally does not leave the house for forty days because baby and Mother need time to bond. The new Mums, Mother or Mother-in-law will come to stay during this time, she passes on her knowledge of looking after a newborn and is a great help to the new Mum.
It’s believed the new Mum and baby require forty days to rest after going through the birthing process and this time helps build the baby’s immunity to sickness once outside the womb. Some may tell you that during the first forty days the baby’s old spirit leaves the baby’s soul, staying inside the house for this length of time ensures no harm comes to the child during this process.
DIWALI:
This is the biggest festival of the Hindu calendar. Diwali – the festival of lights – is huge! It’s celebrated in honour of the goddess Lakshmi - goddess of wealth and prosperity. Hindus pray to Lakshmi to bring them good luck in the coming year. Diwali is usually celebrated at the end of October in the English calendar. Celebrations for Diwali in India creates colossal pandemonium and is a hundred times bigger than Christmas and Guy Fawkes and Easter all rolled in together. The festivities are the most popular event of the year and mixed together with India’s huge population it equals an extravaganza on a massive scale.
HOLI:
This is probably the second largest celebration in the Hindu calendar. Traditionally Holi celebrates the beginning of the harvest season where everybody throws coloured powder (made from natural products) at each other. The more colour you get on yourself the better. People usually wear white to show the kaleidoscope of the various hues. If you don’t want to get covered in coloured powder, you better stay home on the day of Holi.
TAJ MAHAL:
The most famous Taj Mahal is a monument built out of the true love of a husband for his wife. An emperor named Shah Jahan had the memorial built in honour of his third and favourite wife Mumtaz Mahal. They met when she was just fourteen years old, they fell deeply in love but did not marry until five years later. They spent many happy years together until the year 1631 when she died within a few minutes of giving birth to their fourteenth child. Consumed by extreme grief, Shah Jahan decided to build a great monument made of white marble in her memory, it was completed in 1653. Its intricate designs are extremely delicate and even today, four hundred years later, are still just as beautiful and remarkable as ever. The graves of Mumtaz Mahal and Shah Jahan are now in the lower chamber of the monument where the public are not allowed access.
SONG GAME:
This is a game that shows the popularity of Indian songs and is played at family gatherings, parties or functions. One person begins by singing a line from an Indian song. The next person uses the last letter or phonic sound from that line to think of another line from another song starting with that phonic sound. So it continues from person to person until one or the other cannot think of another line from a song. Most of the time the game keeps going around and around from person to person, never ending as there are so many songs to choose from.
MUNDAN:
This is a hair cutting ceremony. It’s believed that the hair a baby is born with may still carry bad traits from a previous life. In the child’s first or third year the head is completely shaved in a ceremony celebrated by family and friends. The hair cutting is done by a priest, preferably but not always, in a temple. Traditionally this ceremony was only performed on boys but now it’s also performed on girls.
TOUCHING AN ELDER’S FEET:
When you meet an older person, it’s respectful to touch their feet because this person is senior to you and highly respected. Originally this tradition came from bowing to an elder.
The older person will pat your head as you reach down to touch their feet and will try to insist that it’s not necessary, that there is no need to do it but it’s most discourteous if you don’t.
NEWLY MARRIED COUPLES EATING FROM THE SAME PLATE:
From the time a man and woman are married, they eat their meals from the same plate (if they choose to follow this custom).
In ancient times when a man took his bride, she was sometimes treated nastily, only given permission to eat once the rest of the family had finished and then only allowed to have leftover food scraps. To show these cruel traditions have been left behind, a new tradition has begun. On her wedding day the bride may have never eaten outside of her family home, certainly never with another man. To show that she is an equal and respected, the brides new family encourage the newly married couple, to share their first meal together on the same plate. To continue the bond between the bride and groom from then on every meal they have will be from the same plate.
These days with life being so busy, this custom may not last beyond a few weeks after the wedding day. Some couples do manage to have their evening meal on the same plate, at least for a few years.
DOWRIES:
It was customary in Indian marriages for the bride to be ‘given’ to her husbands family, which meant she now belonged to them. This is where the tradition of dowries came from. Since the bride becomes a part of her new family, the brides family contribute a dowry (gifts or money or both) to her new husbands family.
The girls parents will want their daughter to go into an admirable family and will try to offer a dowry that is worthy, to ensure she is taken by people of good society.
The grooms family may choose a bride from a lower caste, hoping the girl won’t be ‘world wise’ and that she will be a good submissive wife. The grooms family may offer a lot of gold to take the girl.
There have been cases in the past where a bride was unfortunately not treated well in her new family - treated like a slave and made to do all of the household chores. The bride complains to her husband but he is stuck between his Mother and the happiness of his new wife. For a son to come between his Mothers running of the house and her new daughter-in-law is extremely difficult. The complex relationship of the two women was very hard for a man to deal with, leaving him with a miserable wife. The bride would not want to bring shame on her own family by complaining and she certainly cannot go back to her family home because that would harm their reputation. So the bride stays and tries to be a good daughter-in-law, hoping that if she produces a child things will get better.
EGGS:
Most people consider eggs as vegetarian food. Some vegetarians do not like eating eggs because they come from an animal and dread finding a baby chicken inside. Some people do not realise that hens lay eggs (containing only yolk and white) daily and if there is no rooster it’s impossible for the egg to be fertilised so a baby chicken cannot be inside.
PEACOCK:
The peacock was declared India’s national bird in 1963 because of its rich religious and legendary involvement in Indian traditions. The large bird has a glorious blue, green plumage. In Hinduism, the image of the god of thunder, rains and war, Indra, was depicted in the form of a peacock. India’s cultural dances sometimes involve the poses of the bird. In India some people believe that when the peacock spreads it tail it means rain is coming. This is in fact partly true as when a peacock sees dark clouds overhead it does actually spread its tail and perform a dance.