CHAPTER 34
"When I said 'we should leave', I didn't mean we should walk sixty gazillion miles..." This evening was clearly not going as I planned. Why was I even in that event? Besides the so obvious fact of Catherine threatening you and holding a philosophical gun to your temple? Yeah, that's a good question Morrison. No not that. That's clear to me. What's not- why me? What do you mean, why you? Why on heaven gracious did not Dante or any other servant attempt the gathering, huh? No answer? Good, finally you shut up, my self-righteous inner voice.
"Shut up and keep walking," Duke's voice had absolutely no emotions to it. Yeah, after all, he wasn't the one wearing skyscraper heels and he sure as hell wasn't the one to be freezing his ass off in a too expensive trench coat, which got me thinking... Why were we walking? And why were we taking the road where no living being had been seen in the past three or four hours? Just absolutely unnecessary trees and an endless amount of stars in the nightly sky. If only the stars were bullets, I'd have no limit, just reach out and reload.
"Why are you so tense? It's not like we killed anyone... " I was seventy percent sure nobody was left dead in the grounding of the mansion, but then again, there were those thirty percent hanging in the thin air.
"We?" He kept on walking, not even gracing me a stare, "Since when you and I are a "we"?"
"Since when?" I furrowed my eyebrows as I saw him turning his head to the right and gazing at nothing else but a tree. "I would say since you made me pick up that gun and fire." The same gun he was holding so dearly. A perfectly fine desert eagle. My favorite, but unfortunately he took it from me right after I blew up a car. Funny, he had nothing against me killing people, and we all know he knew about it the whole time, but never once did he try to take away my guns and now he's throwing a hissy fit about a burning car. Yeah, sure, it wasn't on tonight's menu, but so wasn't this little nature exploring.
"I made?!" He stopped hot on his heels and turned around with a bestial grimace on his face, "Listen up, Morrison, maybe that schizophrenia of yours is really starting to kick in, but as far as I can fucking remember, I didn't ask for any stupid gunfire!" Okay, Jesus, enough with the yelling. I'll get a headache.
"You said me to do something... What did you expect from me? To start a campfire and sing kumbaya? Look, a heart shaped tree..." I'm pretty certain I had used that phrase somewhere before, but who cares, it's not like he was even listening. His temper had gotten to the best of him.
"Please, please..." He started rubbing his temple, "just stop talking."
"Fine..." My voice was barely louder than a whisper. I was tired, too tired. Every time we both had a conversation, it turned out as nothing more and nothing less than meaningless yelling.
He turned around and kept on walking. What the hell was I even doing? Why was I even following him, when clearly, he had no idea where he was going. Highway to hell? It started to feel that way. My shoes were really driving me crazy. Once again my eyes locked on the shiny weapon of his. It wasn't easy to startle me, but this was starting to bother me. There was no one in the radius of at least three miles, so why was he carrying that thing in his hand? Why was he still holding it?
Sometimes, when men are really nervous, Morrison, they tend to hold on to something, in this case it happened to be a gun. One that you so desperately want to have. Well that's just stupid. Why would he be nervous?
"I think we're lost..." I spoke as I shoved my hands deep down the pockets of my trench coat, trying to keep the very last bit of warmth somewhere beneath the layers of my clothing.
"We're not lost,"
"We have to be lost, there's no way we're going to reach civilization before a stray dog bites our both legs off," What exactly happened in the mansion? I remember meeting a very unique woman, whom I didn't know, but she clearly knew me. Lady. I corrected myself, she called herself a lady.
"I told you to be quiet."
"We've been going for hours. And I'm pretty sure we're walking on circles. I've seen this tree before." And why on earth is everyone trying to frame me? Is that some kind of trend right now? What's going on?
"All trees look the same," His fingers ran through his hair. Anger in his voice hadn't decreased.
"Not this one. This one is all crooked, just like the one I saw fifteen minutes ago." To be honest, it really did seem like I've seen it before. Before I realized it, I really was just babbling, without a certain reason, but to think about it, it was in the shape of a heart, just like the one I noticed before.
"You're getting delusional," Was he really that blind?
"Are you kidding me?" Despite the aching feet, I made a small run towards him and grabbed him by arm to stop him. "Look, it looks like a heart and..." My gaze lowered on the gun. My lips crooked in a terrified smile. "Duke..." I whispered, "Why is the gun... loaded?"
Finally he looked at me and he was grinning like the devil himself, "Why? To keep you safe of course."
The realization hit me hard. I jumped back just like I'd touched a flame. "You know..." I started smiling, "I never did trust you." I watched as the barrel slowly was in a perfect position to blow my brains to the nonentity.
"Yeah," He put his finger on the trigger, "but you fell for me." Oh that bastard, he'll rot in hell for this.
So this is how it feels. When you're watching death in the eyes and suddenly you start understanding the meaning of life and all the beautiful things you've gone through. That time at the Bahamas when I shot a rapist between the eyes, oh, that feeling was magical. Even in the end, you're still a mentally ill freak, Elle. I smiled.
"You know, if you pull the trigger, there's no way back. God doesn't give second chances, Duke."
"Since when do you believe in God, Morrison?" Always the too skeptical Duke.
"I believe on God written on bullet."
"Then better pray the carvings are done right." He winked. This was not how I expected it to be, I was not scared, not even the slightest bit. I was smiling like the crazy person I really was. After all I always had known there was no other way for me, I wouldn't live a long life, I wouldn't have children not even talking about grandchildren and some asshole like Duke Jones here would kill me. It was just as easy as that.
He hesitated, but I was not going to make it easier for him.
"You know, you have to be a man and look me in the eye, when you do it..."
"I'm not turning away, am I?" And after that everything felt so surreal, like a goddamn movie with awesome 4D effects.
He pulled the trigger.
I died.