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My heart beat accelerated. My eyebrows shot up. Troy stared at me, patient, waiting for an answer.

“What?” I said, in shock. Did he just ask me to marry him? Or did I fabricate that?

“Moni Cullen, will you do me the extraordinary honour of being my wife?”

My hands trembled. “Yes.” I kissed him. “Yes, yes, yes!” I flung my arms around his neck.

A hundred people buzzed by, many staring as he spun me around in the middle of the airport. But I didn’t care. I was going to marry the man of my dreams — my never. The person whom I once thought it wouldn’t work out with.

Troy transferred the diamond to my finger. “Looks good on you.”

I smiled and let him take my hand. This would make leaving him harder, tenfold. But I had to go home, to sort out my old life. “You’ll call often, right?”

He grinned. “So much you’ll be sick of me.”

I gripped the handle of my suitcase, to steady my nerves. “And Ruby?” I would miss his daughter, too.

He nodded, his features saddened. “I’m gonna miss you so much.” He tugged me closer.

“You’ll hardly notice my absence, I bet,” I joked.

He released me then pressed his lips to my forehead. “Go, before I start begging you to stay.”

“Okay.” My eyes roamed over him one last time then I spun and dragged my suitcase over to join the queue. Even now, as I forced myself to think of anything else, my heart ached. How was I going to get through two weeks without him?

They say your home is where your heart is. But my home has never felt so empty. In my humble apartment, there was no Troy or Ruby. I felt isolated and unable to comprehend how anyone could cope in a long-distance relationship. I was in agony. Was I weak? Or is pain always a part of love?

The pile of mail on the counter, neatly stacked, caught my eye. Next to it was a plate of cookies and a note from Mum: Welcome home!

This was no longer my home. It seemed depressing in comparison to what I’d left behind in Cairns. I dumped my bag on a chair and yanked open the fridge. Nothing but chocolate spread and wine. My phone buzzed in my pocket. The screen flashed Troy. I raised it to my ear.

“Just checking the plane didn’t crash mid-way,” he said.

I could hear the smirk in his voice. “Hm, nope. I arrived in one piece — the plane, also.”

“How was your flight?”

“Boring. And the traffic to my apartment was madness.” I opened the freezer. There was a lone tub of ice cream in the back.

“Two weeks is a long time without you, Mon.”

“I know.” I hauled myself onto the counter, popped open the lid and spooned some into my mouth. “But you’re still flying down to help me drive back, right?”

“Yep. You’ll have to spend a whole fifty-eight hours with me, on the road.”

“Just you, me and Dean Moriarty. Can’t wait.” My eyes swept over the apartment. “I should get started on the packing. I’ll call you later?”

“Sure. Love you,” he said.

I hopped off the counter. “I love you, too.”

The night had crept in, leaving shadows on the walls and in my heart. I switched on the light and sorted through the bills and junk mail then tossed them aside. I wanted nothing to do with this life.

* * *

The next morning, my fingers searched the bed for him. It was a habit now, more than anything. But I was alone. And the apartment was too quiet. I stared at the ceiling, gnawing on the inside of my cheek. I was doing the right thing, wasn’t I? Leaving Perth to pursue my dream career and live with my fiancé? My head was swimming with all kinds of questions and thoughts. But I had too much to do today to worry about them.

I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and padded into the kitchen. Coffee seemed like a good way to start this morning. I made a pot and ate a slice of toast over the sink.

By mid-morning, I had culled a third of my belongings. Though it felt as if I were giving bits of myself away, it was a new beginning for me — one that I hoped would be more satisfying.

At eleven, I arrived at Mum’s.

She hauled me into her arms. “Moni! I’m glad you’re back and safe.” Her smile faltered as she noticed my cast. “Your arm. How did that happen?”

“Slipped in a puddle of lemonade.”

She led me into the living room. “Does it hurt?”

“Mostly itches.” I lowered myself into the familiar tattered armchair across from her.

“Tea?” she said.

“Sure.”

She poured the amber liquid into two mugs and offered me one.

“Thanks.” I snitched a cookie.

“How was your trip? And Troy?”

“Both great.”

“I hear he has a seven year-old daughter.”

“Yes. How do you know that?”

“I phoned his mother,” she said.

I rolled my eyes. “I’m sure you did,” I said under my breath. Was there a mother on this planet that wasn’t nosy?

“I also heard that you might have some big news for me.” She grinned over her mug, her eyes darting to the diamond on my finger and back to my face.

Crap. I forgot to remove it. “Yes, well, uh—”

“Spit it out, Dear.”

I breathed deep. “We’re engaged.”

Mum sprung from her chair and hugged me. “I’m so happy for you!” Her arms tightened.

“Have you been into the vodka again, Mum?”

“Oh, don’t be silly. I’m proud of you.”

Hang on. Wasn’t she berating me earlier, about making impromptu decisions because of Kate?

“You’re finally getting your life together!” She froze. “You’re not pregnant, are you?”

“I was there for two weeks, Ma.”

“A lot can happen in a short time.” She winked.

“I’m not pregnant.”

“Well, then.” She settled into her chair again. “Do you want a baby with him?”

The image of a toddler with his hair and smile floated into my mind. “Yes.” How could I not?

“Hm. I never thought I’d hear you say that.”

“People change.” And not always for the better. The thought of Kate and her lies still stung.

“I picked up some boxes for you. They’re in the hall.”

“Thanks. That will save me a trip.”

“If you need any help packing—” She sniffled. “I can’t believe you’re moving to the other side of the country.”

I perched on the arm of her chair. “You can always come for a holiday. Your step-granddaughter-to-be would love to meet you.”

She nodded. “I’d like that.”

I nudged her. “I could use some help this afternoon around three.”

She grinned and met my eyes. “I’ll bring the doughnuts and coffee.”

I ripped a chunk off a chocolate doughnut. “This was a brilliant idea.” I knew Mum wanted to spend as much time with me as she could while I was in Perth. And I didn’t mind, she was on her best behaviour.

Mum held up a lamp. “Pack, store or donate?”

“Donate.”

Her eyes assessed the red fabric. “Can I have it? It would go great with the new rug in my bedroom.”

“Help yourself.” I bubble-wrapped a mug.

She giggled. “And this?” She held up a black shimmery nightie.

“Mum!” I made a grab for it, cheeks burning red.

“It’s a wonder you haven’t already gotten pregnant with this.”

“It’s new.” I shoved it into a box.

“Sure it is.” She glided over to the bakery box and selected a doughnut.

I chugged the remainders of my coffee. “I think we are nearly done for today.” I eyed the stack of boxes.

“Do you want to order in? My shout.”

“I’ve got to get to work early tomorrow.”

“I won’t stay long.”

“Okay. But we are not ordering from that fancy place you like.”

She tugged out her wallet. “I can do burgers and fries.”

I secured my arms around her. “I love you. We haven’t always gotten along, but you are an amazing mum.”

“Took you thirty years to figure that out?” she teased. “You’re not very bright.” Her lips pressed to my cheek. “I love you, too.”

I released her and hauled out my phone.

“I’ll pick dinner up,” she said. “There’s something special I want to get.”

“Okay.” The phone vibrated in my palm.

“Tell Troy I said hello.” She hitched her purse onto her shoulder and closed the door behind herself.

I held the phone to my ear and stepped onto the balcony. “Hey.”

“Hey, Beautiful,” said Troy. “How’s things?”

“I just spent the afternoon packing with my mother,” I whispered as though she could hear me.

“Are you okay?”

“She was nice. She brought coffee and doughnuts. And now she’s out getting take-away.”

“Maybe the reality of her daughter moving has hit her.”

I clenched my eyes shut.

“It’s gotta be hard on you, too, eh?” he said.

“Yeah.” My voice crackled.

“Mon?”

“Mm?”

“Do you wanna stay in Perth?”

“I have memories here,” I said. “But it’s time for me to make some new ones. With you and Ruby.”

He was quiet for a beat. “Ruby drew you something. You want me to express post it to you?”

I smiled. “That would be awesome.”

Ten minutes later, Mum returned. She placed a bag on the counter. “I stopped by Ann’s house — you know my friend who sells those mouth-watering pies to café’s?”

I nodded.

“She was out of both chocolate and apple, but I got us a custard one.” Her smile widened.

“Yum.”

“Okay, let’s eat.”

We carted our food into the living room.

“Thanks for helping today,” I said.

“No problem, Sweetheart.”

I salted my fries. “You don’t think I’m doing the wrong thing, do you?”

She draped an arm over my shoulders. “You’re following your heart as you always have. I admire that in you.” She pressed her lips to my head. “Troy’s a lucky guy.”

“Can you believe that we bumped into each other in some random restaurant?”

“It was meant to be. Maybe you were both supposed to live your own lives first.”

I nodded, letting that sink in. If we hadn’t broken up after high school, there would be no Ruby. And if there were no Ruby …

I didn’t want to think about a world without her. “It’s meant to be.” I shovelled fries into my mouth. “Why couldn’t I figure that out when I was twenty? I could have done without the string of meaningless relationships.”

“Ah, that’s all part of the journey.” She petted my hand.

* * *

I pushed through the doors of Gilmore Publishing with an armload of folders.

My boss, Diane, appraised me. “What’s this?”

“I hate to do this to you,” I said. “But I quit.” I handed her my resignation letter.

Her eyes bulged. “What?”

“I will help you find someone to replace me and sort out every—”

“Monique.” She placed her hands on my shoulders. “I’ve known you for almost ten years. What’s going on?”

“I’m taking a chance.”

“And?”

“I’m moving in with my fiancé.” I lifted my left hand.

She fell into her chair. “What happened on that holiday?”

I chuckled. “I met an old love.”

She was silent for a moment, her eyes darting over the letter. “I’ll be sad to see you go. You’re the best assistant I’ve had.”

“I promise I will find someone just as good.”

She nodded. “What is it that you’ll do?”

“I will be opening my own publishing house.”

She smiled. “I wish you the best of luck. And a week’ll do.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

I stood. “Where do we start?”

“Coffee. Is it too early to pull out my flask?”

“A little.”

She constricted her arms around me. “Ooh. What am I gonna do without you?” Her arms dropped to her side.

“You’ll be fine.”

She took a deep breath and held it for a beat then exhaled. “Let’s get started.”

The phone rang, incessant, as I unlocked my door. “Hold on,” I said as if the caller could hear me. I dumped my bag on the table and grabbed the receiver. “Hello?”

“Moni!”

The sound of Ruby’s voice brought a smile to my face. “Hey Rubes. How’s things?” I kicked off my heels and padded into the kitchen, a cheap bottle of wine under one arm.

“Daddy misses you a lot. He’s been moping around the house.” She giggled.

“I have not,” said Troy, in the background.

My smile widened. “How was school?”

“Boring.”

“Hm. More homework?”

“Tonnes.” She paused. “Dad wants to talk to you. Bye Moni!”

“Bye, Sweetheart.”

A moment later, Troy came on the line. “How was work?”

I sighed and twisted the cap off the bottle. “Busy.” I retrieved a glass from the cabinet. “You?”

“I started cleaning out the spare room.”

I gulped wine.

“I’ve been helping!” Ruby’s voice filled the line.

He chuckled. “She has. And I was wondering if you wanted to wait to pick out the desk and other office things?”

“Sure. We can do that when I get back,” I said.

Someone tapped on my door.

“Hang on a sec,” I said to him then ambled over. I peeked through the security hole.

Kate.

I cursed under my breath. Should I pretend to be out? Unwillingly, my fingers twisted the handle.

“Hi,” she said, “can I come in?”

“What do you want?”

“My Blue October shirt. I left it here last time.”

“Fine. And you can give me two grand for the hotel room.” I struggled to hide a smirk.

She dropped her eyes to the floor. “I’m sorry.”

“No, you’re not. You would have apologised sooner if you were.”

She was silent for a moment.

“Is that all?” I said.

She nodded and I shut the door in her face.

Troy’s voice floated through the receiver. “Was that Kate?”

I should have picked up a bottle of Jack instead. “Ah-ha.” My hands balled.

“What did she want?”

“Her stupid band shirt.”

“And your counter point?”

I kicked a box. “She can have it for two thousand bucks. I pre-paid for that room.”

“Did she offer to pay?”

“No. It’s Kate. She’s so self-absorbed that—” My teeth clenched and a guttural sound slipped from my throat.

“Take a deep breath,” he said.

I gulped half a glass of wine.

“Better?” he said.

“Much.”

“Go and relax. Have a bath. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

“Okay.”

“And Mon?”

“Yes?” I said.

“Love you.”

“Hm, you’re okay,” I teased.

“Huh. You’re lucky I’m not in Perth.”

“Why?”

“Would’ve tickled you for that.”

“Raincheck?” I said.

“Sure. Bye.”

“Love you.”

* * *

I kicked the car door shut, balancing my dinner and cola on a binder, and crossed the lot. I swiped my card through the reader and pushed open the door. My mailbox flap was ajar, an express post bag peeking out. “Yee!” Ruby’s drawing! I dumped my bag and food on the nearby bench and grabbed the package. I weighed it in my palm — heavier than a piece of paper. I flipped it over. Sender: Troy and Ruby DeGaris. I grinned and tore it open.

Inside was a crayon drawing of a girl in a purple dress with a gold crown. My name was scrawled next to her in pink. My grin widened and I hugged it to my chest. Only a week and a half until I see Troy. Two weeks until I see Ruby. Too long.

There was something else. I reached my hand in and retrieved an envelope and a box of champagne chocolate truffles. Yum. I gathered my things then punched the UP button. The elevator dinged and the doors opened.

In my apartment, I deposited everything on the kitchen counter and ripped open the envelope. I unfolded the two pieces of paper — a letter from Troy. My eyes studied the first page, drinking in every word. One paragraph stuck out. I re-read it.

I never stopped thinking about you, Mon. Even after that stupid fight we had a couple of years ago. I never stopped loving you — never will. You’re the one for me. And I’m so happy to be your husband one day.

I swiped at the moisture in my eyes and hauled out my phone.

Troy answered after three rings. “What’d ya think?”

“It’s not fair, you’re a writer.” I sniffled.

He chuckled. “But I mean every word.”

“I know.” I pulled out a container.

“What’s for dinner?”

“Burger and fries. I’m beat.”

“Tough day?”

“Yep. I sifted through résumés from the temp agency — none of which Diane thought were a suitable replacement for me.”

“That’s ’cause Moni Cullen can’t be replaced.”

I carted my food over to the couch. “Not even temporarily.” I shoved fries into my mouth. “Do you have Ruby today?”

“She’s at a friend’s birthday party.”

“Tell her I love the drawing.”

“I will.”

“And make sure you check her for any illegal substances as she comes through the door. Have her take a sobriety test.”

“Mon, she’s seven.”

“We were just five years older when we had our first cigarette behind my parent’s shed.”

“You love her.”

I could hear the smile in his voice. “I do.”

“Good.” He was silent for a moment. “I’ll let you go. Sweet dreams.”

“You also. Oh, and thanks for the chocolates. Just what I needed.”

“You’re welcome, as always. Love you.”

“Love you.” I tossed the phone onto the cushion beside me.

My heart ached for him. I hadn’t missed anyone like this before. It was bizarre, and liberating at the same time. I’d rather walk on hot coals than be separated from him for another second. This week had better go quick.

* * *

“Need any help, Dear?” said Mum as I unloaded boxes from my car.

“Nah.”

“I can make coffee.”

“I’m good.”

“Tea? Cake?”

I heaved a sigh and dropped a box at my feet. “Mum, what’s up?”

She was silent for a moment. “It’s all come so sudden — this fight with Kate and getting married and moving to Queensland.”

My face dropped at the mention of my ex-best friend.

Her eyes flicked over my face. “Oh, I’m sorry Honey.” She hugged me. “But are you sure things can’t be patched up between you two?”

“No, Mum. It’s over.” It felt a bit like a break-up. I wanted to indulge in a tub of ice cream and watch sappy movies all day. But I had too much to do. I shrugged out of her hold. “What cake have you got?”

“That’s my girl!”

I followed her into the kitchen.

Mum cut me a slice. “It’s butterscotch.”

“Cool.” I forked some into my mouth.

“How’s Troy?”

“He’s good,” I said. “He’s flying in next week.” Four days, three hours and counting.

She gasped. “I must meet him!”

“You have known him since I was a toddler.”

“Yes, but that was twenty-five years ago. And he was just a little boy then. I haven’t seen him in, gosh — ten years?”

“I’ll see what I can do.”

“Great!” Her fingers tapped on the counter.

“Is there something else?”

“Can I throw you an engagement party?”

“Well, uh.”

“Please. It would mean so much to me.”

How can I say no when she’s cornered me like this? “Fine, okay.” I finished the cake then unloaded the rest of the boxes. “Where do you want them?”

“Put them in your old bedroom,” she said. “Are you sure you don’t want help?”

“I’m fine, Ma.” I adjusted my grip.

“Okay.” She raised her hands in surrender and stepped aside.

My eyes roamed over the purple walls of my childhood bedroom. It was just how I had left it.

She traced a finger over the stencilled hearts. “Seems just yesterday you were starting kindergarten.”

I deposited a box in the corner. “Mum, I’m not dying or moving to Rio. You don’t need to reminisce.”

“But—” She sighed, her shoulders slumped. “You’re right.”

I wrapped an arm around her. “I feel like some coffee. How about you?”

“I could go for a cup. Or three.”

I smiled. “That’s my girl.”

That afternoon, I borrowed Dad’s old Ute and parked it in my lot.

A blue Commodore pulled in next to me. The window rolled down. “Hey, Stranger.”

My head snapped up at the sound of the familiar voice. “Jay?” I stepped out.

“Yep.” His eyes assessed the vehicle. “I see you updated from your Prius.”

“Yep. Lovely shade of green, isn’t it?” I chuckled. “I have all this furniture to get rid of.”

He lifted an eyebrow. “Furniture?”

“Yeah. I’m getting married, moving to Cairns.”

“Wow. Exciting stuff.” He punched my shoulder. “Haven’t seen you in what — three weeks? Everything’s changin’ Mon.” He placed has hands on his hips. “I can take some furniture off your hands.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. My brother just moved out, he has nothin’.”

“Awesome — I mean, not about Shaun not having furniture.”

“Ah, strangely enough, he likes it.”

“Does he cook?”

“Ramen noodles.”

I arched an eyebrow. “Ah-ha.”

“Hey, not everyone can whip up three course meals at eighteen — except a certain Cullen girl.” He winked.

“Hm. Yeah, but at least you were never starving.”

“Man, sometimes I wish we still lived together. College was awesome with you.” He mussed my hair. “Hey, Bestie?”

“I miss our Friday beer and steak nights.”

“Yeah? It’s still pretty much the only thing I can cook.” He guffawed.

“You should teach Shaun.”

“Good idea.”

“We had better get the furniture. Looks like it’s going to start pouring any minute.”

He cut his eyes to the heavy clouds. “Yep. Cats and dogs.” He followed me into the foyer. “So, who’s the lucky guy?”

“Troy.”

His eyebrows shot up. “DeGaris?”

“Ah-ha.”

The elevator pinged, doors opened.

He let me pass. “I remember how heartbroken he was when you two split.”

“The feeling was mutual.”

He was quiet for a moment, his eyes searching my face. “Sorry. But he’s never stopped loving you.”

The doors opened again.

My head swivelled in his direction. “You’ve spoken to Troy? I wasn’t aware you two were still friends.” I fished my key out and swiped it through the reader.

He nodded once, solemn.

“You knew he had a child?”

His eyes slid to mine. “You didn’t?”

I shook my head.

“Wow. Sorry.”

I breathed deep. Did I actually buy that bottle of whiskey?

“So,” said Jay. “What furniture can my brother have?”

“Take your pick.” I gestured to the room. “The remainders will be donated.”

“I really appreciate this.”

“No problem.”

“Guess it’s tough giving your belongings away?”

I shrugged a shoulder. “I try to think of what I’ll be gaining in return.”

He draped an arm over my shoulders. “You’re the lucky ones.”

A half-hour later, we had the Ute loaded with my couch, bed, tables and chairs.

I dropped the keys into Jay’s palm. “Drive safe.” I pointed a finger at him. “You crash my dad’s truck, I’ll kill you.”

He smirked. “Noted.”

“Be back by five.” My phone chirped as I watched him leave. “Hello?”

“Hey,” said Troy.

“So I was the only person that didn’t know about Ruby, huh? Didn’t think I would understand?” I heard him exhale.

“Mon, it’s not what you think. I was ashamed — a single father. Like I said, I wanted her to be ours. And I couldn’t bring myself to tell you.”

I gnawed on my lip.

“I know you would’ve understood,” he said. “Now, who’ve you been talking to?”

“Your super best friend Jay.”

“Oh.”

I kicked a stray pebble. “I guess the past couple years have been hard on both of us.”

“Yeah.”

“Sorry I snapped at you. Can we start this phone call over?”

“Sure. Ring ring.”

“Troy, guess what? I ran into Jay,” I said. “He’s taking my furniture for Shaun. I heard he moved out.”

He chuckled. “That’s great. I was wondering what colour you’d like your new office.”

“You don’t have to do this, you know? I could work at the kitchen counter.”

“Too bad. I’ve already started.”

I could hear the smirk in his voice.

“And Ruby picked out a wallpaper border — cupcakes.”

My lips tugged into a grin. I expected nothing less from her. “You two have been busy.”

“It’s the only distraction from your absence.”

“Aw. I miss you guys too.”

“Just a few more sleeps,” he said. “What’re you doing tonight?”

“I have a date.”

“Excuse me?”

“With a bowl of popcorn, glass of wine, some truffles and a Sex and the City marathon.”

“Phew.”

“I’ll talk to you later?” I said.

“Yep.”

I disconnected.

* * *

“They’re all good, but not amazing,” said Diane.

“Why?” I said.

“None of them are you.”

We had been interviewing replacements all day.

I pressed a forefinger to each temple. “Diane, you have to make a decision. This is my last day.”

She blew a sigh. “You choose.”

“Me?”

“I trust your instincts.”

Picking my own replacement? Sure, that will be easy. I selected an application. “How about this one — Skye Ellis?”

She peered over my shoulder. “Never worked in the publishing industry.”

“Yeah, but she’s eager to learn.”

Diane arched an eyebrow.

“Right, no time for that.” I picked up another. “Cleo Jenkins? Three years at our rival Eclipse.” I plopped onto my swivel chair. “Before that, she worked in PR.”

Diane snatched the paper. “Hm.” Her eyes glided over the page. “Get her in here.”

I lunged at the phone, scattering pens in the process.

“And order us some lunch while you’re at it.”

“Sure thing.” I located Cleo’s business card and punched in her number.

An hour later, she was seated in front of us. Two minutes after, she had the job.

“When do I start?” said Cleo.

“How’s Monday?” said Diane.

“Monday’s perfect, thank you.” She smiled.

Diane’s eyes tracked Cleo’s exit.

“See, wasn’t that bad,” I said. “She’s perfect for the job.”

“Time will tell.”

I sighed, a smile playing on my lips. “You can’t replace me, Diane. I’m just too good.”

She broke into a