Karissa had stayed up half the night, unable to sleep with everything running through her head. She wanted to believe in Marsh, wanted to believe him when he said he was framed, but his fingerprints on that plastic bag made it hard to trust. She’d always thought that the system worked when you followed it, so now she had to hope that it would work for Marsh.
Hank didn’t speak to her but asked for their mom instead when he called late that morning to give an update about the meeting between Marsh, Bruce, and the detective. He was still angry with Karissa for daring to question Marsh’s integrity, and she had the feeling it was going to take some groveling to get back on his good side.
The update had simplified her conflicted feelings since she’d seen Marsh throw out the bag, seen it with her own eyes in front of a couple dozen people. Anyone could have taken it. And yet there was still a tiny voice in the back of her head that said he still might be guilty. She was terrified to really trust Marsh, to give in to her feelings, afraid she would just be hurt again. But she couldn’t let him go to jail if he wasn’t responsible. That would have been true even if she hadn’t fallen in love with him.
As the afternoon arrived, Karissa grew nervous; word had come that Marsh’s parents were flying in from Virginia and would be staying with her family. When Paul went to a friend’s house to play, she decided to go for a drive to relax.
After driving several back roads, she ended up at the high school, and after a quick moment of deliberation, went to the basketball practice. Though there was plenty of sound in the form of squeaking shoes and bouncing balls against parquet flooring, the place seemed too quiet and held an air of abandonment, which made no sense. Maybe it was her imagination.
She peeked in at the doorway, not wanting to distract anyone as she watched the guys interacting with Rex. There was definitely a feeling of discomfort in the room, and no laughing or joking among the boys like she’d seen in previous practices. The whole school knew about Marsh’s arrest now—they had to. She was sure most of the locals had known before their heads hit their pillows the previous night.
Marsh wouldn’t appear before the judge until the next day. She wondered what the arrest and rumors would do to his reputation. Would he be allowed to continue teaching if they straightened it all out?
Her heart ached for him, and for the boys running through the motions on the basketball court. They went through the rounds of activity, their movements mostly by rote, and Rex appeared twitchy. She wondered if he was worried he’d be arrested by association, even though Marsh was innocent. Did he think Marsh was innocent?
Her stomach quivered and she turned away when Rex called an end to practice and sent the boys to the showers. She stepped forward before they could disappear, even though her stomach clenched with apprehension. “Can I have a minute?”
When several of the boys looked her way, she felt her face grow hot with embarrassment.
“Sorry, I know you’re all tired and ready to go home for the night. It’s been a long, crazy week, so I’ll keep this short. You all know that Coach Willmore was arrested last night for providing those drugs to the kids who were kicked off the team.” She had to swallow past the lump in her throat. “Considering how much he harped on not drinking or smoking, you either think that he’s the biggest hypocrite alive, or like me, you believe he’s innocent and someone else is trying to make him look guilty.”
Karissa clasped her hands together, wanting to fidget in the worst way. She let her gaze move from boy to boy, studying each of them, hoping she was getting through to them.
“I know you guys are the ones who were following the rules, so you probably don’t know anything, but if you heard rumors or think you might know anything, even if it didn’t seem like much at the time, please tell the sheriff’s office so they can find out the truth. Marsh believes in you guys, and he needs you to believe in him.”
She didn’t know what else to say and wondered if she’d rambled. She noticed Rex’s raised brows before he smirked a little in the way men sometimes did when they thought women needed to have their heads patted and be sent back to the kitchen. Smug jerk probably thought she was just too in love to be rational. Karissa wasn’t sure if he was wrong.
“That’s a pretty little speech for your boyfriend. He’s a big believer in paying the piper when you screw up. I guess it’s his turn.” Rex looked at the boys, who were still watching. “You heard her. Now, get cleaned up so we can leave. And get some rest; you’ve got a game coming up.”
She saw a few furtive glances between the boys, but none of them protested. A couple murmured goodbye to Karissa, one saying he wished he could help.
Karissa’s heart dropped in her chest as she wondered if she’d just made a fool of herself in front of everyone. And it hadn’t done a bit of good.
***
Nervous energy poured through Karissa as she waited for the sound of the Willmores’ car on the frozen ground outside. She felt like a woman about to meet her future in-laws for the first time, but she’d known them for years. And she had no idea where her relationship with Marsh stood at the moment. Both of these things meant she shouldn’t be anxious about their visit, but she couldn’t help it.
She glanced up as a set of headlights flashed across the window and felt the knot in her stomach tighten even more. She wasn’t sure if she could do this when her feelings for Marsh were so strong, but her head was so confused.
Paul ran into the room and launched himself into her lap, knocking the breath out of her. “Mom, if Uncle Marsh’s parents are coming to visit, why isn’t he coming too? He should come to dinner. So why not?”
She smiled and blew raspberry kisses on his cheek. “He just can’t make it. Maybe tomorrow night, okay, squirt?” Except she’d be at work at dinnertime the next night. There were days that she hated her job. The previous week she had explained to Paul about the boys being kicked off the team for taking bad drugs and mentioned that Marsh was very busy as they tried to figure out what happened. She hadn’t mentioned the charges against Marsh after his arrest.
There was a knock at the front door and Hank emerged from the living room, welcoming his best friend’s parents. He greeted them with hugs and ushered them into the foyer.
Karissa stood, hauling her son into her arms, even though he was big enough now that it was awkward carrying him. “Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Willmore.” She pasted on her best smile as she moved toward them. When Ellie smiled at her, Karissa felt a little sick. This woman thought Karissa supported Marsh completely, and Karissa felt like a traitor.
“You look so lovely,” Ellie greeted her. “And is this your adorable little boy? Marsh has told us so much about you two.” She wrapped Karissa in a tight hug and pressed a quick kiss to Paul’s cheek.
“Thank you, he talks about his family a lot. I hear you’ve been busy working on a fundraiser for the hospital wing.” Karissa turned the attention away from herself as quickly as possible, much more comfortable with other subjects, and sure the discussion would come back around to her all too soon.
She was right, of course, but not right away. Marsh’s parents settled into the spare room, and they talked farming over dinner, but when Paul was in bed and the adults sat around the living room with dessert, Ellie brought the subject back to the charges against her son and Karissa’s relationship with him.
“And how are you dealing with everything going on? It must be hard, seeing him in jail and knowing there’s nothing you can do. It’s driving me batty. Have you learned anything since we spoke with your parents this afternoon?” She reached across the coffee table between them and patted Karissa’s knee.
Karissa poked at her cake, not really interested in it, but not wanting to look Ellie in the eye. “Not that I’ve heard. They won’t tell me much of anything because of my relationship with Marsh. The last reports I heard, though, weren’t too encouraging.”
“Well, we all know he’s innocent,” Ellie said, tucking into her cake. “We just have to hope everyone else figures it out quickly so you can move on.”
Karissa dropped her eyes to her lap, desperately hoping they wouldn’t question her stance on his innocence. If only wanting something to be true could make it so.
“That’s the problem, Ellie,” Hank said, a hard edge of anger in his voice. “Karissa thinks he’s guilty.”
Karissa’s head snapped up in surprise. Why would he say that to Marsh’s parents? “I, um, I don’t know.” Her tongue suddenly felt too big for her mouth and she couldn’t get the words she wanted to say to come out.
“You think my son is guilty?” Ellie asked. Her forehead furrowed and hurt slid onto her face. “How could you think Marsh would do something like that? He said you were getting serious, that he saw a future with you. But you think he would sell drugs to kids so he’d have a winning team?” Ellie’s fork clattered against the plate with her half-eaten cake as she set them on the coffee table. She rose and rushed from the room.
Frank watched his wife take off, then looked at Karissa. “You don’t know?” His face was hard and implacable.
“Look, I care about Marsh, so much, but I just…I know the evidence is dicey, but I’m still confused. I’m sorry.” Karissa stood and took her plate to the kitchen. She scraped the cake into the garbage, then set the plate and fork beside the sink. Needing some air, she grabbed her coat and headed outside.
It was freezing and the scent of cow manure hit her the second she stepped into the frosty air, but she didn’t care. How could she explain something to everyone else if she didn’t understand it herself?
She walked to the horse barn and slid into the quiet warmth. The scent of hay mixed with the outside smells, and the only thing she could hear was the soft snuffling of one of the horses. She walked down the aisle between the stalls and stopped at the mare she used to ride.
Karissa realized she hadn’t been on a horse since returning to town, a shame considering how much she enjoyed it, but it never seemed like she had the time. Scarlett whinnied at her, poking her nose out, searching for a sugar cube.
“You don’t think I’m a jerk, do you old girl?” Karissa caressed the horse’s face and wished she’d brought a treat. “I’m pretty confused right now, honey. Do you have any good advice for me?”
Scarlett pushed her head forward and nipped at Karissa’s hair.
Karissa laughed and pulled back. “I need that, you know.” She set her cheek on the horse’s and sighed. “I’m making a mess of things and I don’t know how to fix it.”
There was a creak of hinges as the barn door closed. “How about if I shut up long enough to listen?” It was Ellie.
Karissa turned, feeling her gut tighten. “I don’t blame you for hating me.”
“I don’t hate you. I just want to understand why you could think Marsh would do such a thing.” Ellie came forward. “I was angry, but I saw the way you blundered out here. You’re very unhappy. What happened?”
Though she didn’t know what to say, Karissa walked away from the horse to meet Ellie. She stuffed her hands deep into her coat pockets and pulled it closer around her. “My doubt isn’t about Marsh, not really. I’m ninety-eight percent sure he’s innocent. I’m the one I don’t trust.”
There was a pause before Ellie asked, “Is this about your ex?”
Karissa wanted to say no, but she couldn’t. Instead she nodded slightly. “I believed in him. I never guessed he’d cheat on me. It makes it hard for me to trust anyone else now.” She shrugged helplessly. “I know that’s screwed up, but I don’t know what to think about all of this. I know that bag though, the one with the fingerprints; I saw Marsh toss it before we went out for dinner. I know he didn’t take it home. All of the boys and coaches saw him passing out the water bottles; they all knew his prints were on it. Who knows who else saw it as well?”
Karissa dug her fists deep into her coat pockets. “I want to believe in Marsh with my whole heart. I’m trying hard to get there; it’s just not quite as easy for me as it is for Hank. He doesn’t understand that.”
Ellie smiled and pulled Karissa into a hug. “Keep up the fight and we’ll both just try to have faith that it’ll all work out. Come on; let’s go back inside where it’s warmer. And smells better.” Ellie tipped her dark head toward Karissa’s. “Marsh never tells me enough about your dates. You’ll have to fill in the gaps.”
Karissa smiled, though she wouldn’t feel comfortable about any of this until Marsh was free again and she could be sure that he was innocent.