BENE
THE UNIVERSITY OF GERICH ASSET RECOVERY TEAM
EASTERN RENDEROS
It was late afternoon in camp, with many days and miles between the party and the horrors of Mumolo. The weather was mild and Bene was sitting quietly, working on his notes. For all those small pleasures he was glad.
For other things he was not so glad. What bothered him the most, of course, was the fact that she had managed to evade their grasp yet again. They’d very nearly been upon her a few days north of Mumolo, but she’d somehow found a way to slip free. And she was moving more erratically now, too, which was new and unexpected, and therefore of grave concern. Over the past fortnight she had gone east, then northwest, backtracked, and then suddenly veered west. To be fair, she didn’t exactly have a lot of options. Had she continued north, she would have eventually stranded herself on the coast of Renderos, with nowhere left to run. An easterly route would have yielded the exact same result. From the interior, however, she could go anywhere. South, and back to Kanosh, was a most unlikely destination but still a possibility. Directly west lay lands even harsher than most and less travelled. It was doubtful she’d go there, but you couldn’t rule it out, either. Most likely she would dodge them. Northwest, and attempt to slip into Bayar, in Sarasinian League territory. Or southwest and Cirum, which was also Sarasinian. Kanoshians were not exactly friends of the League, so if they followed her there, they would almost certainly be received... well, less than cordially. She was ultimately headed there, though–he’d be willing to bet his mother’s life on it–and the thought of that kept him awake at nights.
As was too often the case, Bene wasn’t in love with the terrain they were travelling through. The forest was gone and the knolls he’d hoped never to see again were back, supplemented by all the joys of a dry expanse of treeless rock and dirt. Ah, but that only made her easier to track, or so said the experts. Despite that major advantage, why were they not gaining on her? He’d asked that very question, only to be informed that she was moving faster now, having apparently acquired a horse and several spares. He found it more than a bit hard to swallow, truth be told, but didn’t dare say it. Weren’t these guys also expert horsemen? As Khela had once said, you’d think they’d just ride her down or something.
“You will absolutely not believe who’s a couple now,” said Khela, making him jump. The girl had apparently acquired the ability to materialise out of thin air. Her eyes sparkled the way they always did when she had a juicy bit of gossip to share.
“Well hello to you, too.” Bene closed his book. “Who?”
“Guess, I said.”
“Actually, you didn’t.”
“Well it was implied.”
“Ugh,” said Bene, shaking his head. “You know how shit I am at guessing games, Khel. Just tell me.”
“Come on, guess.”
“No.”
“Please?”
“No way.”
“Fine.” She swivelled her head in what seemed like no particular direction. “It’s those two.”
He peered around. There were dozens of people about, so he settled on the first pair he saw with their heads together. “Big T and His Magister-y? Wow. You’re right, I would never have guessed they’d end up together.”
Khela feigned throwing up. “No! Yuck! How could you even–? Yuuck!”
Bene surveyed the camp again. “All right, then it must be... Gansen and Barls? Hmm. Well I can’t say it doesn’t come as a surprise, but I’m hardly one to judge.”
“Ugh. No.”
“It’s not those two apprentice smiths over there, is it?” asked Bene, one eyebrow raised. “Because that actually wouldn’t surprise me.”
“All right. Just stop.”
“Do you see now why I said it was better if you just told me?”
“Those two,” murmured Khela. “Over there. Sergeant and New Girl.”
Bene’s jaw fell. “Hassing and Agbo? No fucking way! You’re kidding, right?”
“Shh!” Khela suddenly sat and pulled him to her so their faces were almost touching. “Not so loud. She’s got ears like a... I dunno, what’s something with really good hearing?”
“A bear.”
“Really?”
“I’ve no idea.”
“Ugh.”
“Well that’s great and all,” said Bene, struggling not to look at Khela’s boobs. The problem was, Khela was all boobs. And she was asking a lot of that blouse she was wearing, too, by the way. As his cock inevitably stiffened, he slid his notebook over it and hoped she wouldn’t notice. “But how do you know they’re a couple?”
“Because they were screwing last night.”
Bene’s jaw fell again. “They were not! Were they?”
“They certainly were.”
“You saw them?”
“Well, no, but I definitely heard them.”
“I’m not surprised. You’ve got ears like a bear.”
“Shut up,” said Khela grinning. She was really enjoying this.
“All right. Go on...”
Khela’s eyes gleamed. “They were in her tent. Actually, it wasn’t their first time.”
“Wow. And you’re sure it was them? I still can’t really imagine it, to be honest.”
“I’m sure. I’m two hundred percent sure.”
“That, uh, seems a tad excessive, but then again it’s not like you’re majoring in maths. Which is probably for the best.”
“Bene...”
“Fine. Sorry. But wait–even if they’re doing it, it doesn’t necessarily make them a couple, does it?”
Khela shook her head. “Oh no, they’re a couple. You don’t know her like I do. We’ve been talking. She asked me for advice, actually.”
“What? Do you mean, like, sex advice?”
“Well I can’t say I didn’t give her a little bit of that as well, but mostly it was more like, I dunno... relationship advice.”
Bene laughed. “Relationship advice? You? Well that’s it, then. It’s official–they’re screwed.”
“Ugh. Stop! I mostly gave her hints about what she could do to get his attention, all right? Besides, it worked.”
“Hmm. Well I guess if they’re really together, your advice can’t have been all that bad.”
“And talk about strenuous! You have no idea...”
“Yeah? Wow.”
“They’re getting less discreet about stuff, though.”
“Well, if there’s anyone who knows a thing or two about that, it’s definitely you.”
Khela scowled, her buoyant mood vanishing. “Piss off, Bene. Or I’ll just go.”
“Sorry.”
“Just… don’t. It’s ancient history, anyway.”
“Fair enough, Khel. Well, I’m happy for them. I’m surprised, but I’m genuinely happy for them. So, uh, you were saying something about how they were… strenuous?”
“You’ve no idea.” Khela’s cheeky grin was making a comeback. “That little tent of his can barely contain the gymnastics contest they’ve got going on in it nightly.”
Bene swallowed. Was it just him, or was the air between them practically humming with energy? She was so beautiful that it honestly ached just to look at her. He fought the urge to put his mouth on hers. “It’s kind of weird though, don’t you think?”
“Weird how?”
“Well, I do remember you telling me she wasn’t interested in doing any kind of pre-marital stuff. And also considering how he beat the living shit out of her in that swamp, and er, you know what else besides.”
Khela shrugged. “Yeah. I mean, sure, maybe theirs wasn’t the most auspicious first meeting ever, but believe it or not, that was part of why she chose him.”
“Um, all right?”
“She says it kind of, oh I don’t know, helped her connect with him or something. I mean, somehow? No, don’t go looking at me like that. It didn’t seem logical to me at first either, but the way she explains it, it sort of makes sense. Sort of. Oh look, I don’t know…”
Bene thought about it. “It’s a bit messed up, but hey, who am I to say they’re wrong? So much shit has happened on this trip, I’m kind of at the point where if stuff wasn’t weird I’d be suspicious.”
“Yeah. Well anyway, it wasn’t some snap decision on her part. Going with Hassing was a bigger step for her than you can possibly imagine. But after Mumolo, after we found out what actually happened to her family and everything? Well, I think all that contributed to it. And then when Roaoo offered to take her on…”
“Mm?”
“Well, it was almost like she was reborn.”
“Reborn?”
“All right, well maybe not that, exactly,” said Khela, making a face. “But something close to that? Free?”
Bene nodded. “Sure. She’s had a pretty traumatic time. She’s probably just looking for happiness where she can find it.”
“Yeah! And she’s tough. I mean, she’s all about not letting anything that’s happened get the better of her, you know? But I think it’s mostly the happiness thing like you said.”
“And let me guess... you helped things along by telling her she should grab Hassing by the nuts and enjoy him while she was still alive to do it?”
Khela slapped him on the arm. “Well, I definitely did not use those exact words. And I think she’d already come to a similar conclusion anyway. I really just helped validate her decision, if anything.”
“Hmm.”
“He so likes her, too. Did you know the other day I actually saw him smile? I was so shocked I did a double take. And the way he looks at her? Oh, I wish a man would look at me the way he looks at her!”
Bene wanted to laugh, but didn’t. “You’re kidding, right? There’s a camp full of guys who all look at you that way, Khel.”
Her shoulders slumped. “Yeah, I suppose…”
Time to change the subject, thought Bene. He had precisely zero interest in finding out who she’d humped and dumped this week. “Hey, by the way, I’ve been meaning to ask you how that manuscript of yours is coming along.”
She gave him a flat look. “Um. It isn’t.”
“Ah.”
“I haven’t written a word since Mumolo, Bene. Literally! Roaoo is going to kill me when he finds out.”
“No, he won’t. It’ll be all right, Khel.”
“But you don’t know that!” wailed Khela, her voice rising. “He’s going to–”
“You’ll be fine.”
“How do you know?”
“Because I just know.”
“No, it’s a total disaster, Bene. I’ve missed all the deadlines. He’s going to ask me to leave the university for sure!”
“No, no. Actually, Roaoo said not to worry.”
“He said not to–? What do you mean?”
“Well I was talking to him the other day, and–”
“Woah, woah! Talking to him about what?”
“About your manuscript, of course. And about, well, you and your er, situation.”
“Oh no!” said Khela, mortified. “Tell me you didn’t?”
“Relax. It’s all right–”
“Tell me you didn’t?” Khela’s eyes hardened. “Oh, no! No! I did not give you permission to go blabbing about any of that, did I?”
Bene showed her his palms. “Hey, hey! Stop. Just take it easy, will you? Look, it’s not like I went to him and said you were struggling or anything, all right? Shit, Khel, have a bit more faith in me than that!”
“So what did you say, exactly?”
“I was talking with him about my own manuscript, that’s all, and I just happened to mention how you and I had the same problem. Which is that there are so many variables with the wights and everything, and how everything keeps changing on us all the time. Right? I’m not wrong, am I?”
“No, I guess not.”
“Right. Well Roaoo understood the situation better than you think. I mean, what happened at Mumolo practically turned our knowledge of wights upside down. Not to mention the world! How many new theories and discoveries will come out of all that, huh? So, he suggested we both just, well, put our manuscripts aside for the time being. And maybe concentrate on compiling more notes and recording our travels and experiences and stuff.”
“Really?” Khela looked genuinely confused.
“Really.”
“He actually said that?”
“Yeah, he did.”
“So I don’t have to do my thesis?”
“Well, I wouldn’t go that far,” said Bene with a frown. “I mean, c’mon, Khel, of course you still have to do it! Eventually. But we’ve got some extra breathing space at least. A lot of breathing space, potentially. At the rate we’re going, I don’t think we’re ever going to catch up with her…”
“And, what, we’ll do our manuscripts when we get back or something?”
“Yeah, pretty much.”
“Seriously?”
“Seriously.”
“Wow. I can’t quite believe it.”
Bene smiled. “He said he was too busy to tutor us at the moment anyway.”
“Wow.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“Thank you.” Khela took a deep breath.
“For what?” Bene took a deep breath as well. “I didn’t really do anything.”
Khela’s eyes moistened and tears began to flow. “Oh, Bene. You did. This means a lot. You’ve really been there for me lately, and I haven’t said thank you often enough.”
He took her into his arms. “Yes. Well, I am pretty great.”
“You idiot,” she said, half-laughing, and then began sobbing in earnest.
“Hey now,” said Bene, stroking her hair. “It’s all right.” He held her close and it took all his willpower not to let his eyes linger on her chest. When it stopped its awful (but also tantalising) heaving, he said, “You’re still having those dreams of yours, aren’t you?”
Khela nodded and looked up at him, her face wet with tears. “Yeah.”
“That sucks.”
“It does. They’re horrible. But I think the worst part is that I don’t really have anyone I can talk to about them. Except you. Even Ghislaine’s sick of listening to me. She makes herself scarce if I try to approach her tent these days. Everyone thinks I’m pathetic.”
“No. No, that’s not true.”
“Yes, it is. They do, Bene.”
“They really don’t, but even if they did, so what? Why would you care what they think?”
Khela disentangled herself from him. “I don’t belong out here, Bene. You’ve said it yourself many times. I’m too soft-hearted, I cry all the time, I’m too emotional…”
“I know I said that, Khel, but I take it back. Whatever you are, I know one thing that’s true, and it’s that despite everything we’ve seen and done out here, you’ve managed to hold onto your sense of compassion through it all. I mean, you saved Barls from the rope, didn’t you?”
“Yeah.”
“And you reminded us that the Renderosi aren’t all savages, and that we could probably go a bit easier on them. Which we have, I think. And you were instrumental in getting Agbo to join us–don’t forget about that. So, all these things make you the opposite of pathetic. And if they’re the result of you being soft-hearted, well, maybe a little soft-heartedness isn’t all bad.”
Khela smiled. “That’s a sweet thing to say.”
“Maybe. But I’m not saying it to be sweet.”
Fresh tears coursed down Khela’s cheeks. “I can’t bring myself to write about them anymore, Bene. The wights, I mean. I just can’t.”
“Yeah, fair enough.”
“They know what they are. They know!”
“Yeah.”
Khela shivered as she shook her head. “It’s a horror I can barely imagine, even though I’ve seen it so many times. I keep asking myself what it must be like. You know, for them? What does it feel like to wake up from death, of all things? But you don’t know you’re dead, not at first. You only begin to get a sense of it when you look down and see yourself rotting. And everyone you love is the same! Oh Bene, I can’t even begin to imagine the shock and anguish these people must go through.”
“Mm. I think about stuff like that all the time, too.”
“And then you realise that you’re not even breathing, that you don’t even have to! And you can move even though there’s no blood pumping through your veins. Because you’re alive, but not really.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“And you can’t talk, either. Try as you might, no one can understand you. And anyone who isn’t like you runs away because they think you’re dangerous and you’re trying to kill them. But you aren’t. Deep down you’re still you. Only you have no way of communicating it. You’re stuck, neither dead nor alive.”
“Yes.”
Khela screwed up her face. “And then we come along and kill you.”
“Yes.”
“Do you remember, in the beginning? When we first started? We shot so many of them, Bene! We used to go out of our way to hunt them because we thought they were aggressive and contagious. But they weren’t. They weren’t even thinking about hurting anyone. They were only reaching out for help, but we didn’t know. They’d have been screaming inside. Desperate. Scared. And we put them down like dogs. I can’t even bear to look at them anymore. I don’t want to see another wight as long as I live.”
“I know.”
“That wretched object shouldn’t exist, Bene. Who would make something capable of so much evil? And to think she’s out there, using it every chance she gets. She’s evil, too. But we’re to blame as well because we’re the ones who had to go and dig the fucking thing up! Didn’t we? In the name of knowledge and everything. That thing should never have seen the light of day!”
“Yeah,” said Bene, looking down at his lap. If nothing else, this conversation had been a very effective boner killer.
“It’s all so disgusting. And you know what? I don’t want to keep talking about any of it anymore. I don’t even want to speculate about it. Not about that bitch, not about objects, not about anything. I don’t care. You know, I think I’m going to quit, Bene. I’m going to ask if I can go back to Kanosh. I have to get out of here. I’ve had enough.”
“No.” Bene’s voice was firm. “No way.”
“No?” Khela wiped her nose with her sleeve. “You don’t get to decide this. I don’t think I even have a choice anymore, Bene. I mean it. I can’t stay out here. I can’t keep on like this. I just can’t do it!”
Bene shook his head. “Bullshit. We all have choices. And I think you if you left–which I don’t think would be so easy, by the way–you’d be losing a golden opportunity.”
“How do you mean?”
“How do I mean? To do good!”
“I don’t see how...”
Bene put a hand on her arm. “This is something I’ve actually given a lot of thought to over the last few weeks, Khel, so hear me out.”
“All right.”
“Get this: you’ve witnessed first-hand what the object is capable of, right?”
“Yeah...”
“There aren’t many people around who can say that, let alone talk intelligently about it. I mean, no one who hasn’t seen the shit we have would believe even a fraction of it. Right?”
“Probably.”
“Well, everything that’s happened out here needs to be told. And not just by Roaoo. Your version of events needs to be communicated, and not just to the campus crowd either. The ordinary people back in Kanosh should hear it, too. I mean, you could use what you’ve seen to argue against further exploration of the Trench. You could lobby to have the Object Studies Department shut down. How about that? You could be part of, I dunno... the opposition.”
“The opposition?”
“Yeah, absolutely! This isn’t Sarasinia, Khel. Tell your story, bring what happened out here to light! Become an anti. If you don’t, people will only hear Roaoo’s account of this expedition. You don’t want that, do you?”
Khela looked at him. “No. I probably don’t.”
“Right. So you won’t accomplish anything good by quitting now, will you? And there’s another side to all this you might want to consider, Khel. And it’s this: when we recover that object–and we will–a lot of people back home are going to think it’s the best thing ever. Despite what you might have to say about it. Shit, maybe even because of it!
“But it gets worse. We don’t know what the Warden Master really thinks, or how he’ll react when we get back. Do you think he’ll be in a hurry to lock the object away, though? Or destroy it? Because I don’t. You could conquer the world with that thing, potentially. And do you think he’s going to want to seal up the Trench? Because I’m not sure he will, not when there might be more world-conquering objects down there waiting to be dug up. That’s why there needs to be an opposition–to make people think twice!”
“Mm. You’re right.”
“I get your impulse to run, though. To quit? Really, I do. There are times when I feel exactly the same way. But you’re sure as shit not leaving. You can’t just walk away.”
“Wow. That speech was actually inspiring. I had no idea you were this good.”
“Also, I’d miss you too much.”
Khela chuckled despite herself. “I shouldn’t be laughing, but that’s too funny.”
“It wasn’t meant to be. I really would miss you. Who would I have to bounce ideas off about my research if you weren’t here?”
“Um, I hate to contradict you, Bene, but you haven’t bounced anything off me in ages.”
Bene grinned. “That’s what she said!”
Khela’s expression was a delicious fusion of a smile and a wince. A smince? Eh, not bad, but he’d come up with a better word for it later, maybe. “I meant ideas-wise, Munning. I didn’t mean that.”
“I know,” said Bene. “I know.”
“How’s your research going, anyway? It’s been a while since we discussed it.”
“Khel, are you kidding me? I’m the first guy in history to communicate with a dead person. My research is going to help the world redefine the very notion of death. Of life! Or undeath, or whatever. Doesn’t matter what you call it, I’m at the cutting edge! Do you know what this means for my career? Talk about an upward trajectory, baby! I’m set. Absolutely set. Even at this point, I’ve got enough work to go on for the rest of my life.”
“Yeah, true.”
“Everyone’s going to want a piece of me when we get back. I’m going to be up to my ears in pussy.”
Khela chortled. “You think? And only up to your ears? You are too funny.”
“And it can’t come soon enough, I must say. I haven’t exactly seen a lot of action lately, if you get my drift.”
“Oh yeah?” Khela bit her lip.
Bene knew that look well. He felt the blood rushing to his ears. “Well, no, I wasn’t proposing anything–”
“Are you blushing?”
“No,” said Bene, in spite of the fact he very obviously was.
“You’re so cute.” Khela moved to kiss him.
Bene nearly passed out from shock. Her lips felt softer than butter. When she finally drew back, he looked at her. “So,” he said, trying not to let nerves get the better of him. “So, I was thinking of holding a gymnastics contest in my tent tonight. You, um, wouldn’t be interested in registering as a competitor at all, would you?”
Khela paused. “Sorry.”
“Ah,” said Bene, swallowing his disappointment. “Heh, well…” Nothing ventured, nothing gained, as they say.
Khela grinned, and then leaned in as if to whisper in his ear. Instead, she flicked her tongue against his earlobe. In an instant he went from semi-chub to raging hard. “I meant, sorry, but there’s no way would I not like to register.”
Bene almost couldn’t believe his ears. “Wow, really?”
“Yep.”
“Well... great!”
“Better limber up, boy.