I/Tulpa: Sex, Stars, and Singularities by Ion Light - HTML preview

Verdeschi didn’t just let go, but pulled one of the medical staff’s hand away from Jon, and he was doing it even as Russell was giving the warning, clearly having had anticipated Russell’s call. Jon convulsed as the shock was given. Droya body echoed his convulsions.

“Again,” Russell said. “Damn it, Jon! Stay with us. Again!”

Jon convulsed. Russell nodded to Verdeschi and he used a bag to give air.

“Clear,” Russell said.

Another shock caused Jon and Droya to convulse. Russell waved off more air. She sunk into herself, but tearful. There was sadness, but she was also doing the math trying to figure out if she had missed something. “Time of death,” Russell said, looking up at the clock to read it off.

“Got a pulse,” the nurse said.

Jon sat up, gasping. They eased him back down. He surrendered to them, crying.

“Droya…”

Let’s get him to the bed.

“No, let me hold her,” Jon pleased.

They got him to the gurney. “No, lay down,” Russell insisted.

The female tech gave startled cry; Droya sat up. She immediately stood and rushed over to Jon.

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“Are you okay?” she asked. She seemed startled by the sound of her own voice, but she overcame the oddity and focused on Jon.

“Droya!” Jon said, reaching for her.

“OMG, Jon, you so didn’t just call me Droya,” the android said.

“Loxy?” Jon asked.

Loxy was aware that everyone was staring at her. “Can you all see me?”

Jon laid his head back, closed his eyes, and went to sleep.

160

Chapter 23

Jon awoke back in medical. As soon as he did, medical staff gathered around. Across the way, he saw Loxy examining herself in a virtual mirror. She was touching her face when she became aware of the activity around Jon. She went to his side, smiling.

“Look at me,” she said.

“I can’t seem to wake up from this dream,” Jon said.

“You’re not dreaming,” Russell said.

“Am I?” Loxy asked.

A tremor shook the room. It came and went, and folks continued on. Nurses went to stations for systems check and to prepare for any injury reports from remote locations.

Jon sat up, putting a hand over his chest as he did so. “Ow,” he said. Loxy reached out to touch him, but he pulled back.

“I’m concerned,” Loxy said.

“Who are you?” Jon asked.

“Jon, don’t you know me?” Loxy asked.

“No, I don’t. Where’s Droya?” Jon asked.

“What happens to any of us when we cross over?” Loxy asked.

Jon laid back down. Another tremor came and pass. He seem to not even register it.

“I know you were with her longer than me, but she is still with us,” Loxy said. “She simply switched places. She had no intentions of leaving you alone. It’s why I am here.”

“How do you feel?” Russell asked.

“Overwhelmed,” Jon said.

“Me, too,” Loxy said. “But I am excited, too. We’re together. In this space/time.”

“Are we?” Jon asked. He gripped the side of the bed to hide the fact he was trembling. “I don’t feel your emotions. I don’t hear your voice. It’s like a part of me is missing.”

Loxy again reached out to comfort him.

“Please, don’t touch me,” Jon said.

“OMG, Jon, it’s me,” Loxy said. She touched her face to identify the wetness. “Fuck! I didn’t know android tech could cry.”

“It mimics all human functionality,” Thankur said, who was sitting at one of the beds, still reading data he was receiving from the android body formerly known as Droya.

“Tell me how to turn off the emotions,” Loxy said.

“We even haven’t figured out how AI learned to emote. How can I tell you how to be?”

Thankur asked.

“Maybe we should withdraw and you and Loxy talk amongst yourselves,” Russell said.

“No!” Jon said. “You are responsible for this.”

“Excuse me?” Russell said.

“You and the reptiles put stuff in me,” Jon stammered.

“Now, just a damn minute,” Loxy said. “You’re responsible for taking the reptile jab.

And your unconscious is responsible for downloading me into Droya. What?! You won’t even meet my eyes? You can fuck a complete stranger without a second thought, but you can’t look me in the eyes? You can’t talk to me?”

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“I don’t know who you are! I look at you, I see Droya. My memory says Droya. But I hear someone else. You say you’re Loxy, but the Loxy I knew had a flavor. I knew her because, because, well, because I knew her. I get nothing from you.”

“Nothing?!” Loxy demanded.

“I get a voice, not even an echo of what I heard in my head, and a visual that belongs to someone else,” Jon said. He started gasping, and clutching his chest. “Fuck.”

“Calm down,” Russell said.

“Oh, don’t coddle him,” Loxy snapped.

Jon recoiled. “Mother?”

“Transference lately?” Loxy asked.

Koenig made his presence known. He was accompanied by Verdeschi. “Jon, the Others have gathered. They want you to attend.”

“He needs to rest,” Russell said.

“He needs to get back in the game,” Loxy said.

“We’re experiencing an increase in Lunar quakes. The Others believe if we jump now, they will diminish, and they say it is compulsory for you to be present,” Koenig said.

“I am not me,” Jon said.

“What does that even mean?” Loxy said.

“If you were Loxy, you would know what I mean,” Jon told her.

“What, you’re going to compare this to the Star Trek episode where the transporter accident causes Kirk to split into his light side and dark side?” Loxy asked.

Jon blinked. “Yes, actually,” Jon said. “How did you know?”

“I am Loxy!” Loxy said.

Jon went to hug her but she pushed him back and pointed. “You’re still in the penalty box.”

“I thought you understood that you’re my good side that I can’t be without you?” Jon said.

“I am still inside you, you dope. Your experiences of me haven’t been deleted, I am just, beside ourselves. Who you are, who we are, hasn’t changed, just the way we exchange information,” Loxy said.

“It’s clearly easier for you than it is for me,” Jon said.

“Why, because I am in an android body?” Loxy asked. “You don’t think I feel the

disconnect, too? I am use to being awash in your testosterone and feeling the onslaught of excitement and repression that hits you every time a skirt flares in front of you and fuck!” She stared at Thankur. “How the fuck does an Android body get horny?!”

Thankur didn’t even look up from his data padd. He simply shrugged. “Maybe it’s a function of consciousness and not necessarily hormones.”

Loxy turned back to Jon. “Seriously, you need to get back on the right side of this soon, or I am going to bed Audrey.”

“Okay,” Audrey said.

“Can I watch?” Jon asked.

“Yes,” Audrey and Loxy both said.

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Jon slid off the bed and stood up. “Okay, well, I am feeling better now. Back to work, then?”

“Just like that?” Russell asked.

“Yeah, why not?” Loxy asked. “Off to the meeting?”

“Um, if you don’t mind,” Thankur said. “I would like you to remain so I continued scanning data.”

“Don’t you dare touch her,” Jon said. A tremor nearly took him off his feet.

“No one is going to touch her,” Russell promised.

“Well,” Audrey said.

“Commander, she needs to be deactivated. Clearly an alien presence has compromised this android,” Verdeschi said.

“Are you kidding?” Thankur said. “We need to study this! This could be the missing link to understanding consciousness!”

“Audrey, escort Jon back to ops,” Koenig said.

Audrey took Jon’s arm to lead him.

“You two behaves yourselves now,” Loxy said, winking.

“Of course,” Audrey said.

Jon pointed at Koenig. “Seriously. No dissemble. Number Five is alive.”

“You’re not funny, Jon,” Loxy said.

“That was seriously funny,” Jon said to Loxy. To Koenig. “But I am serious.”

“Seriously, go,” Koenig said.

“Have fun storming the castle,” Loxy said, and laughed from cracking herself up. She snorted.

Jon stopped. “That’s new.”

“Oh, I seriously don’t like that,” Loxy said.

“Stop trying to be funny,” Jon said. “You’re the straight man, I am the comedian.”

“Do I look like a man to you?” Loxy asked.

“Go, now,” Koenig said. “You’re like the DC fucking Wonder Twins in that you both talk too much.”

निनमित

As they entered the tram, Audrey was removing her coat. She hung it front of the camera and before the tram was even moving she had engaged Jon, taking him to the floor. This was one of those fast, unplanned engagements that didn’t require complete undressing. In fact, part of the fun of the play was making it work with minimal disruption of clothing, like open pant, and shifting underwear to the side. They were in full swing when a tremor occurred and their tram shuddered to a stop.

“We stopped,” Audrey said.

“Don’t stop,” Jon said.

Audrey looked at him, shrugged, and they finished. She stood, straightening her skirt. Jon secured his pants. When he was done, Audrey took her jacket down from in front of the camera.

A voice came over the intercom. It sounded like Yasko. Jon noticed that the tube that had once 163

been suspended above a crater was now resting on both sides of the crater. The pylon center of the crater, that held the middle of the tube up, had disintegrated. A spider web pattern was in the glass that spanned the crater, the car’s tube lying across it. More fractures inched across the glass, like melting ice about to give way to something too heavy. Air was leaking out through the glass, and it was probably only positive air pressure that kept it from completely giving away.

“You both could have been moments from death, but you had to finish?” Yasko asked.

“Know a better way to die?” Audrey said.

“You’re going to have to walk the remaining distance. A disruption in track continuity has taken the trams offline,” Yasko said.

“Gotcha,” Audrey said.

“You need to hurry,” Yasko said. “Crater Lake is depressurizing. It has been evacuated and sealed.

“We’re leaving,” Audrey said. She opened a hidden compartment in the floor. “Umm, Yasko. There’s only one emergency suit in here.”

“Check the other compartment,” Yasko said.

Audrey checked all the compartment. “Who the hell did the service check on this thing?”

“Don’t worry. The tube is still pressurized. You can make it to the building,” Yasko said.

“Put the suit on,” Audrey said.

“No, you put the suit on,” Jon said.

“Stop the macho, chivalry crap, and put the suit on, now,” Audrey said.

“I am not being macho, I am being logical,” Jon said. “If the tube depressurizes, I can’t carry you.”

“But I can carry you?” Audrey asked.

“I am injured, tired, and just had a major medical procedure. You’re young, in shape, and are a trained professional. If something happens, you will get me to the other side.”

“I am expendable, you’re not,” Audrey said.

The section of tube they were in fell a foot.

“Both of you, out, now, go,” Yasko instructed.

Audrey took Jon by the arm to the forward part of the tram. She also pulled her weapon and fired two blast into the glass shattering it. They jumped out of the tram and began to climb the slope, using the side of the wall to help get them traction. They made it to the top and began to move across more level ground.

“Come on, we need to make it to that next section,” Audrey said.

“Run on ahead, I’ll catch up,” Jon said.

“I am not leaving you,” Audrey insisted.

“I can’t run,” Jon said.

“Still not leaving you,” Audrey said, quickening their pace.

A klaxon began to sound. A breeze came at them suggesting a breech somewhere behind them. A door ahead of them began to close.

“Come on,” Audrey said, forcing him to speed up. He fell, but she got him back on his feet. She got them both through the door just as the bridge gave away. The wind pick up, and they fell forwards to the floor as they put their head into the wind. They were on the floor, 164

sliding back towards the door, their feet touching either door as it pinched close. Air pressure equalized. The Klaxon ended, but the light stayed illuminated.

“Hope that fuck was worth the near death,” Yasko said.

Audrey sighed. “Best fuck ever.”

“Yeah, like, the earth moved and everything,” Jon said.

“It was nearly the last fuck ever,” Yasko said.

Audrey laughed and hugged Jon.

“Would you both please come out of the tube,” Yasko said.

“Yes, mother,” Audrey said.

165

Chapter 23

The Others greeted Jon warmly. Apparently, they had all watched the drama unfolding on one of the monitors that Yasko and her team were watching.

“Technically, I did die,” Jon said. “My heart had quit and everything, a couple hours ago”

he said.

“Technically, you didn’t die,” Edrei said. “Your heart stopped, but you weren’t dead.”

“Semantics,” Edrei said. “Did you see the Light?”

“Oh, way to bias his response,” Danique said. She hit slapped at his arm. “Stop trying to die.”

“We need to move the moon,” Lucia said. “I propose we begin our group trance. Our collective force should harmonize with the lunar frequencies, bringing balance, minimizing the disturbance that renders us unconscious.”

“In other words, you want us to be unconscious so the others don’t lose unconscious,”

Edrei said.

“In essence, yes,” Lucia said.

“What do we have to do while in trance?” Jon asked.

“‘We’ don’t do anything,” Kesia said. “Our group conscious knows what we want and will facilitate the action necessary to manifest our will.”

“Sounds kind of new agey,” Jon said.

“It is,” Danique said.

“Okay, let’s do it,” Jon said.

“You sure are in a good state a mind,” Saffi said.

“He should be,” Kesia said. “He’s had sex recently.”

Jon blushed.

“She was gauging you, and you gave it away,” Danique said.

“No, I could smell it on him,” Kesia said.

Danique sniffed. “That’s what that is?”

“Let’s focus,” Lucia said. “Jon, if you will sit here. Everyone, make circle around him.”

Jon sat in a chair and they brought their chairs in around him, forming a circle. They even took hands.

“Are you going to hypnotize me first?” Jon asked.

“No, it’ll happen in a moment,” Lucia said.

“You’re not going to swing a crystal?” Jon asked.

“Nope, we’re just going to stare at you,” Lucia said.

“I’m feeling very uncomfortable with this procedure,” Jon said.

“Relax,” Lucia said.

“Will it even work after having recent sex?” Danique said.

“Should make it easier, actually,” Kesia said.

“Let’s focus, like I taught you,” Lucia said. “Kesia, connect us.”

“Um,” Jon said, biting his lip.

“Feeling aroused?” Saffi said.

“Go with it,” Lucia said. “Focus.”

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Jon’s breathing increased. He gripped the chair. His eyes began to drift shut. He tried to open them, barely got slits opened, but he could see them. It was like their faces were up near him. It was like they were spinning his chair. He saw the six of them twice before his eyes shut again. He heard Lucia’s voice contacting Alpha. The computer’s voice responding

‘synchronizing. Initializing translation protocols. Standby. Standby…” Jon’s perspective changed to outside of himself, looking down on the circle, as if from the ceiling. “Three.” Then he was far away, looking down on the moon. “Two.” The moon had receded away further.

“One.” The moon was gone.

निनमित

Jon woke to find the others standing over him.

“Aww, he’s back,” Saffi said.

“It didn’t work?” Jon asked.

“It worked great,” Aadya said. “All our people reported back. Only a few thousand became unconscious. No seizures. No medical emergencies.”

“I…” Jon began.

“Yep, you lost consciousness,” Lucia said.

“Are we safe?” Jon asked, getting up.

Danique offered him a hand. He accepted her hand and she pulled him up. They all went to the window and stared out at the ‘gift.’ A structure that had not been present prior to traveling now filled the window. From his present perspective, he couldn’t see it all, but he would soon the totality of it: there was a primary dome, connected by six smaller domes. Each of the smaller domes offered a landing pad. There were structures visible inside the domes; buildings. The buildings resembled the pyramids Mayan pyramids, with one primary pyramid in the center of the primary dome.

“That is…” Jon began.

“Amazing,” Lucia finished.

A door chimed. The Others quickly made consensus and Jon said ‘Come in.”

The door open and Loxy stepped in.

“Sorry to interrupt, but, Jon, you need to come see this,” Loxy said.

“The pyramid? In the dome?” Jon asked.

“Yeah, nice, come, quick,” Loxy said.

Jon caught up to Loxy and they proceeded out together. The others followed. Loxy led him to the far plate glass window where they saw a gem of a planet. They were close enough to observe weather patterns. Dark blue oceans, emerald green seas, and land masses were clearly visible. A distant quarter moon was visible, but Jon didn’t focus on that. He focused on the land masses, something unwinding in him.

“Oh, my, god,” Jon said.

“It looks habitable,” Saffi said.

“It is,” Loxy assured them.

“How do you know?” Edrei asked.

“That’s our home,” Loxy said.

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निनमित

The next meeting was in an auditorium. Jon and Loxy were on the stage. Live feeds on stadium monitors, accompanied by virtual holographic topography to enhance the presentation on the stage itself, provided planetary information; people could also utilize pads.

Jon looked at Loxy. He was still a bit dazed. She was holding his hand. She squeezed it.

The silence wasn’t perfect, there were coughs, and a few whispered conversations, but all in all, it was an incredibly uncomfortable feeling to be scrutinized by so many people at once, humans and aliens. This meeting was a big deal. The Other Torchbearers had front row seats. So did Russell and Koenig. Audrey was just off stage. She gave him a thumbs up.

“Um, okay. Hi. Um, sorry,” Jon said.

“Want me to do it?” Loxy asked.

“Yes, please,” Jon said.

“Spit it out,” Loxy said.

“But you asked,” Jon said.

“I was being nice,” Loxy said.

“And now you’re not?” Jon asked.

“I am actually being nicer by making you face it,” Loxy said.

“But,” Jon said.

“It’s your planet,” Loxy said.

“It’s named after you,” Jon pointed out.

“Yeah, that was nice of you, but your speech,” Loxy said.

Jon sighed. He brought his hands up to the planet next to him. “This is planet Bliss,” Jon said, and covered his mouth with his hand. That seemed to be all he had. He looked to Loxy for help.

“It’s named after me,” Loxy said. Loxy beamed a pleasant smiled at the audience.

“Um, yeah, um, I fell in love with Loxy and named the planet after her,” Jon said. “But, it existed before her. Oh, but that’s probably not relevant.”

“I think it’s relevant,” Loxy said.

“Yeah, um, me, too,” Jon said. He looked at the planet. “Based on present level of development, it’s reasonable to speculate it existed before me, but um, well, here’s the thing.

From my perspective, I kind of created it.”

There was a stir in the audience. Several people got up and walked out. It was only humans who departed.

“Yeah, I hear you. Maybe this is a language foul up. Maybe creating it is the wrong word.

Maybe I just discovered it. Maybe I was just so desperate for a place to escape to when I was young that I found this place. All I know is this, when I first six, I could astral travel, and I could come here.”

More people got up to leave.

“Oh! Come on!” Jon said. “We’re on the fucking moon and it’s jumping through space and we’re encountering gods and dinosaurs, you don’t think we might arrive somewhere in the 168

Universe where I’ve been before? I mean, seriously. I can prove it. You go down there. You’re going to find trees.”

“And squirrels,” Loxy said.

“A lot of squirrels,” Jon said.

“A ton load of squirrels,” Loxy said.

“Initial insertion point, a lone tree, right about here,” Jon said. “First home, mother of all trees in the center of this forest. And Second Home, right over here, on the west coast overlooking the ocean. Send an Away Team and you can confirm what I am telling you.”

“They don’t call them Away Teams,” Loxy reminded him.

“Yeah, I know,” Jon said.

Someone stood up. “You own the planet?”

“Um, own isn’t quite the right word,” Jon said. “It’s more like a co-op. Like a planet size Kibbutz. I was designated the primary personality interface. I speak for the planet.” Jon looked to Loxy. She nodded.

Another person stood up. “Are you okay if some