Chapter 19 cross roads
Fixit rose from a deep level of inactivity to execute a self diagnostic protocol. It wasn’t necessary to awaken all the systems, but there was a curious pull to discern if there had been any changes in the environment. There was sound. Specifically, there was the sound of a holographic projector displaying a recording. Fixit activated the visual systems, without turning on their amplifying lights. There was sufficient light in the cave to see without requiring amplification. A female sat in a chair, her back to him, watching a hologram of a baby. Fixit knew who it was without running any recognition programs. It opened a small hatch and reached up to catch its Lightsaber. The Lightsber didn’t emerge.
“Looking for this?” the woman asked, holding up Fixit’s Lightsaber.
As a medic droid, Fixit had other weapons at its disposal coming to bare even as it propelled itself forwards, lowering appendages into attack mode. It froze, coming to a jerking halt. The other hand of the woman came up to reveal that she had placed an inhabitor on it. She rotated to face the Droid.
“I thought you understood my desire to abort,” Byrnes said.
“I will not allow you to kill Preston,” Fixit said.
“You named it,” Byrnes said, amused.
“It will make it harder for you to bear what must be done, but then, I did tried to avoid all this by having the abortion in the first place.”
Byrnes rose from her chair, moving towards the exit. She pushed a button on her remote control.
“Come along, Fixit,” Byrnes insisted.
“We will need to find a flight crew if we’re going to fix this.”
♫♪►
Trimmer was fuming.
“I told you we’d be left stranded in interstellar space,” he said.
“All we have to do is degrause the field cables and recharge them,” Corissa explained, to the ‘table.’ “We should be able to get two, maybe three more jumps before they’re irrepairable.”
“Can’t you just print some new parts?” Preston asked.
Trimmer looked at him as if he were a moron.
“Surely there is a three d printer,” Preston said.
“This isn’t a toy ship that you print up parts,” Trimmer said.
“We could print patches that might buy us a few additional minutes of hyper time,” Corissa said, thinking it through further.
The ‘table’ was the Captain’s table. Doler sat at the head, with Favelle on his right. Lestelle was present leaning against a wall, as well as Daphne, Nolasco, and several ship personnel that hadn’t been introduced. Freya stood behind Preston.
“Minute jumps, that won’t get us anywhere useful,” Trimmer complained.
“And it won’t take that Star Destroyer long to figure out we haven’t gone far. Or the Bloodhunters.”
“So, why we don’t we just skip to the part that needs to be addressed,” Daphne said.
“If what has been said about these Bloodhunters is true, then invetably Preston will be captured. We should go our separate ways.”
“That’s not an option,” Nolasco said.
“It’s the most viable option that no one has yet put on the table,” Daphne said.
“We will go into hiding,” Corissa said.
“Where will you go that there isn’t a computer or a Droid? It only takes one infected computer to hijack a hyperspace communication system and ring your wherebouts across the Galaxy, and the next time they show up, it will be with ten Droid ships,” Daphne said.
“You’re putting us all at risk, Preston. Your daughter at risk. Her mother. Your friends. Is that what you want?”
Preston nodded.
“Daphne is being reasonable. We should go our separate ways.”
“We’ve all been tagged as co-conspirators in your continued freedom,” Nolasco said.
“Even if we part ways, we are in jeopardy until they capture you.”
“Then I should surrender to them,” Preston said.
“Or, how about we figure out a solution, like maybe we delete you from their memory, or insert a Trojan that makes them think you’ve been captured or killed already,” Corissa said.
“We’d have to capture one intact,” Nolasco mused.
“They self destruct once captured,” Preston said.
“Then we find one of their hyperspace relays, or a base of operation, and we do it directly,” Corissa said.
“They have to have a base. Something’s creating them, because I find it hard to believe that they rely completely on existing infrastructure to transmit code. Too many sentients wipe code and start from scratch just because of Trojans and hackers in general.”
“Even if we knew of a base or relay, I doubt my Corvette is up for another fight,” Doler said.
“Yeah, we’d definitely need a bigger ship,” Nolasco said.
“I could get us a bigger ship,” Preston said.
“And, it’s in range of our present capabilities.”
“What kind of ship?” Doler asked.
Preston shrugged.
“Bigger than this one,” Preston said.
“Functioning?” Nolasco asked.
Again, Preston shrugged.
“I’m pretty sure I saw some lights on the last time I saw it, but even if it’s not, there’s bound to be some spare parts we could salvage. Either way, my knowledge of it and sudden recall can’t be a coincidence. I recommend going there.”
“Even if this ship works out, we’re going to need a software engineer and a target,” Daphne said.
“I’ll meditate on the target. I am bound to find something interesting,” Preston said.
“If nothing pans out, I can always ask for help.”
“Oh, right, like Yoda?” Daphne scoffed, rubbing her forehead.
“Well, I tend to avoid Yoda. He rarely answers a direct query, and I find his sense of humor perversely aggravating. Kenobi mostly offers platitudes, which is annoying in its own way. My conversations with Mace Windu have always been pleasant, but not necessarily fruitful. Atris is nice, too. Very knoweldegable. Though, she’s hard to look at. I mean, she’s beautiful and all, but sometimes I see her my age, sometimes as a child and sometimes as an elderly person. I find the drastic changes unsettling,” Preston said, contemplating it.
“I suppose that, too, is a lesson in letting go of our attachments.”
“You know Yoda?” Favelle asked.
“Who doesn’t know Yoda?” Preston asked.
“Okay, well, first things first,” Doler interrupted.
“We’re alive because we trusted Preston’s strategy, so we will test him again. We will go and check out Preston’s ship and then decide our next action.” He dismissed the meeting, calling on Fite and Trimmer to get the engines ready for the next jump.
Daphne hung back to speak with Preston, Lestelle looked to him to discern if he wanted help extracting himself from an unwanted conversation, but his eyes suggested he had it. She touched his shoulder as she departed, fueling another flash of fire in Daphne’s eyes.
“You’re attachment to your friends is going to get them killed,” Daphne said.
“You said as much in the meeting,” Preston said.
“You’re not supposed to have a family. Families make Jedi vulnerable,” Daphne went on.
“I think the Sith hold a similar maxim,” Preston said.
“I’m tired of hearing you compare my beliefs to that of the Sith!” Daphne snapped, slapping the table.
“How about this argument: if learning to only rely on the Force, an outside agency, is good, why would reliance on others be shunned? If you believe the Force works through others then family and friends are not only beneficial to our growth, they are essential,” Preston said.
“I want to hear you say that when it gets one of them killed. When it gets Ten killed. Maybe if you were a real parent instead of an appointed one, you would understand that,” Daphne said, ending the conversation by walking away.
Preston sat back down, focusing on his breath. He was confused as to why Daphne was so stuck when her own philosophies accentuated that there is no death. Even if she had never practiced out of body techniques, she had experienced the Force on a greater level than most people, and he imagined that should bring her sufficient comfort. He also took a moment to consider the opposite, that perhaps he was being too cavalier about other people’s lives. He couldn’t completely dismiss the latter. He closed his eyes. There was no better place or time to reflect over Daphne’s passionate insistence that the Jedi’s no attachment clause might have some merit.
♫♪►
There were pretty much a dozen methods for leaving one’s body, but Preston found one method particularly efficacious, as it work for him 90 percent of the time. From a meditation of mindfulness, he inventoried the room just as it was when he had closed his eyes. As he began to relax, he felt a rush of vibrations throughout his body, as if he were on a ship accelerating away from the surface of a high-G planet, pushing through air to escape velocity. Once he was outside himself, the vibrations and the noise subsided. This was the most critical stage of leaving one’s body, for one stray thought could affect his entire ‘outing,’ sometimes making it hard to get back on track without re-entering the body and starting over. The Astral, or Light Body was incredibly thought responsive. At this level of consciousness, a thought was synomous with action; it either created personal action or changed the environment and it happened instantaneously. A fearful thought could bring storms or monsters. Thinking of a friend would draw you instantly to that friend. Recognition of the desire for sex could bring a dozen random partners equally horny and one could be engaged in intimacy before one even had the time to consider compatibility issues, much less time to ‘just say no.’ It was always better to have one’s intentions refined and declared before leaving one’s body so that the goal was precise, and absent of metaphor or double meaning.
Preston’s meditation had been about his responsibility to his friends, and so when he found himself beside himself, he knew it was an opporuntiy to explore further, but he also knew he needed a specific answer on solving the Bloodhunter issue; his mind went there.
“I need information on Bloodhunters now,” Preston said.
Traveling took many forms. Sometimes he felt himself rushing across the emptiness between stars and then other times, he was there, wherever there was, instantaneously. He arrived at Shade’s Palace so quickly that the change of environment was disconcerting. Only the familiarity with the place helped him orientate. He ‘knew’ where he was. Yerd was dealing cards in front of him. The fact that he was still hovering within reach of the physical plane, as opposed to the myriad of other alternive dimensions that he could have found himself, suggested that his answer was here. The fact that he recognized Yerd seemed like another good omen, as again, because of the coincidence factor, there was meaning to be explored. There was no such thing as a meaningless coincidence, but rather only a lack of understanding of how it all fit together. He decided to manifest himself on the physical plane remotely.
His doppleganger coalesced out of the smoke and no one seemed to take immediate notice of him, or the fact he arrived from nowhere. Being slightly invisible was a Jedi trick, that didn’t require a hood. In this instance, no one reacted to the suddenness of his appearance, but simply acknowledged his presence upon being noticed, with their minds offering a reasonable explanation that he must have just arrived or always been there. He recognized one of the waitresses as he approached the table. She smiled pleasantly at him, and he was pretty certain she wanted to address him, but a customer conveniently distracted her with a request. Another coincidence to prevent him from being distracted? Yerd looked up.
“Hello, Yerd,” Preston said.
“Preston?!” Yerd said, excitedly.
“How are you?” His mouth opened to an ‘O’ which was most humans interpreted as surprise but was actually the equivalent of a human smile of appreciation.
It was just a ‘coincidence’that simultaneously with that ‘O’ Preston felt a weapon push into his back. The words followed: “Where is Jordeen?”
“Minder,” came a calm voice behind the man with the weapon, which Preston recognized as Keena.
“Shade wants to see him, uninjured.”
Minder chuckled.
“I was just about to bring him,” Minder said.
Preston turned and bowed to Minder and Keena.
“It’s nice to see you both again,” Preston said.
“Put the weapon away, Minder,” Keena said. Minder frowned, but put the weapon away.
Keena imitated Preston’s greeting.
“Would you come with me, please?”
“I think I need to speak with Yerd, but I have put you off several times, which no doubt resulted in no little trouble, so I will yield to your request,” Preston said.
“Thank you,” Keena said.
“If you will excuse me, Yerd. Maybe we can speak later?” Preston asked.
Yerd nodded, and returned to his game. Preston accompanied Keena and Minder back to the main audience chamber in which Shade resided. Shade immediately began laughing as they approached her divan. Isho was there, playing cards with Shade. Preston bowed to her.
“No way!” Shade said, throwing down her cards.
“Preston G Waycaster!” Preston bowed.
“It is a pleasure to meet you, Shade.”
“What does the G stand for?” Shade asked.
“I haven’t thought about it, actually,” Preston said, musing.
“I just thought it sounded nice.”
“You are way too funny!” Shade said.
“So, what brings you to my humble abode?”
Preston shrugged.
“I think I need to speak with Yerd, but Keena reminded me that you had wanted to discuss a matter, and I apologize if I inconvenienced you. I’ve been rather distracted, lately.”
“Bloodhunters can be distracting,” Shade agreed.
“You know about the Bloodhunters?” Preston asked, curious, but not surprised.
“I would love to discuss business, but I have a policy about engaging in big business transaction without first engaging in play,” Shade said.
“I would require you to do something for me before I will consider entertaining a conversation.”
Preston didn’t seem surprise, but simply nodded, going with the Flow of the Force as he saw it. He was now certain it couldn’t be an accident that he was here.
“I suppose, if you have any information that might help against the Bloodhunters, then an exchange is appropriate. I consent to being your servent.”
“No way?! You’re offering yourself as a slave?” Shade asked.
“Umm, no. I am sorry for the miscommunication. I am willing to serve, or fulfill a request, but I maintain my own personhood. I’m not fond of the fact that you hold slaves,” Preston said.
“My indentured servant’s lives are improved through my employment,” Shade said.
“My servants have more access to luxury and training than any slaver can boast in the market. It really pisses me off that people don’t understand economies. Even at slave wages, it takes time to train people to meet your expectations, and if you’re always killing and trading slaves, you really never get ahead. And I get really attached to my pets.” She said this last while petting Isho.
“Which reminds me. How is Jordeen?”
“She is well,” Preston said.
“I don’t suppose you’d be willing to give her back?” Shade asked.
“I would not,” Preston said.
Shade chuckled.
“Apparently, even you can discern value. But enough. I wish to watch you engage Keena and Isho, simultaneously. If they both have a ‘turn over,’ I will conduct business with you.”
Preston was silent for a moment. Keena was suddenly rigid with tension. It was certainly not the first time she had been asked to perform an act for her Master, but it was likely to have been the first time she had wanted to actually participate, and certainly not under scrutiny. Isho looked at her cards, trying not to let her own emotions be read.
“What’s wrong Preston G? Are you shocked by my request?” Shade asked.
“No,” Preston said.
“But I don’t really understand it.”
“I want you to be intimate with…”
“Oh, I understood that part,” Preston interrupted.
“Does having an audience bother you?” Shade asked.
“Please, I’m a Doctor,” Preston said.
“Nothing biological offends me. Additionally, privacy is an illusion, a luxuary provided only to those who are not one with the Force.”
“So, what was that face you made?” Shade asked.
“I just assumed you wanted me to give you a ‘turn over’ directly,” Preston said. Shade laughed.
“I doubt you can lift me,” Shade said.
“You judge me by my size?” Preston asked.
“You are human, I am Hut, what do you think?” Shade asked.
“I think you need to learn the ways of the Force,” Preston said.
“No way,” Shade said, smirking, and slapping her side.
“Your offer is tempting, but for now, I would be happy if you simply make my servants happy.”
“Very well, then,” Preston said, sitting down in a lotus position on the floor.
“So, you’re not opposed?” Shade asked.
“As long as Keena and Isho are agreeable and are not performing under duress,” Preston said.
Keena came forwards, unstrapping her gunbelt. Isho put down her cards and joined Keena, helping her with her buttons on her vest. Another female slave came forwards to collect the belt and weapon, and any other items that the couple handed her. Preston closed his eyes.
“Wait,” Shade said. Keena and Isho stopped, unsure of what they were doing wrong.
“What are you doing, Preston?”
Preston was silent.
“You want us to undress him first?” Isho asked Shade.
Keena touched her stomach. Isho’s skirt lifted as if a breeze had blown directly up her legs. Then both Keena and Isho lifted from the floor. Both initially made noises of being startled that gave way to noises indicating that they were experiencing increasing waves of pleasure. It was a subtleness that neither had experienced before, a total body immersion into sensation, both external and internal, as if every cell was being gently caressed. The slave girl holding the gunbelt reached out to touch Keena, who was now lying horizontal in the air. Her experienced started immediately at the same intensity that Keena had achieved over an increment of time. She laughed, almost exactly like Jordeen might have laughed, closed her eyes and gave in, her feet coming off the floor as she was lifted to height greater than Keena, her head down towards the floor, feet reaching for the ceiling. Isho was upside down, too, her legs together, knees bent as if she were hanging from a tree branch, her dress was straight up, pinned to her side, as opposed to falling down about her hips.
Shade was panting.
“Oh my,” she was saying. Then she came off her pedestal.
“No way!” she shouted.
“Oh, no way!” she went on. Two guards came up, pointing weapons at Preston, afraid Shade was being hurt.
“Don’t you hurt him!” she snapped. They withdrew, hesitantly.
As the experiencers hit their peak, everyone in Shade’s audience chamber was affected, but not flying. After the turn-over, the senssations faded. Shade was set easily on her Pedestal, apparently exhausted to the point of being asleep. Isho lay on the floor, one hand on her stomach, panting, while she stared off at the ceiling. The slave rested her head against Isho’s belly. Keena crawled over to Preston and sat up, touching his knees. She was still smiling at him when he opened his eyes.
“Is that what it feels like to use the Force?” Keena asked.
“Oh, no. Using the Force is even better than that,” Preston said.
“Teach me,” Keena asked.
“We can teach each other,” Preston said.
♫♪►
Lestelle, Jordeen, and Ten had retired to their room, while the crew, with Corissa, continued repairing what they could. Ten paced, wanting to help. Freya stood by the door, watching Ten pace. Lestelle was drinking tea.
“I want to talk to Preston,” Ten said.
“He’s meditating,” Lestelle said.
“He’s always meditating,” Ten sulked.
“Maybe you should try it,” Jordeen offered.
“Pfft,” Ten rebuked.
“I want to do something.”
“Meditating is doing something,” Jordeen said.
“I want to do something useful!” Ten continued.
Jordeen thought about saying meditating is something useful, but only smiled.
“Preston needs to start training me in the ways of the Force now, before we get attacked again,” Ten said.
“Meditating would be a good first step towards that goal,” Jordeen said.
“And I can teach you that.”
“Can you teach me to pick up an object with the Force and hurl it?” Ten asked.
“Theoretically,” Jordeen said.
“I have levitated some small stuff, but it’s really not my thing.”
“So, what’s your thing?” Ten asked. Jorden chuckled.
“It’s a secret.”
Ten came to the table and sat down. She put a spoon in front of her.
“Alright, I am ready, what do I do?” Ten asked.
“You lift the spoon,” Jordeen said. Ten frowned at her.
“How?”
“Start by quieting your mind,” Jordeen said.
“You’re trying to trick me into meditating,” Ten said.
“No, it’s not a trick. You can’t levitate stuff with thoughts. You can’t move things with emotions,” Jordeen said.
“Really?” Lestelle asked.
“I thought that was how poltergiests work.”
“Emotions send energy into the unconscious mind, which often results in physical phenomon, but most frequently emotions translate into a somatic illness, less rarely, objects being tossed around the room,” Jordeen explained.
“People have the understanding wrong. The conscious, waking mind, where we are now, is the lowest expression of mind, it is the epidermis layer of existence. The unconscious mind is not only bigger, but it is the next level in an infinite series of levels moving inwards. If you focus on the spoon, with this mind, with these emotions, you are most likely to only become frustrated and saturated in disbelief.”
“So, what do I do?” Ten asked.
“Look at the spoon. Do you see it?” Jordeen asked.
“Of course. I put it there,” Ten said.
“Did it take any effort to see it?” Jordeen asked.
“What do you mean?”
“You’re seeing the spoon, but did you have to tell yourself to see the spoon, or is it just there?” Jordeen said.
“Do you hear the hum of life support? Do you hear my voice? Does it require any effort, or is it simply that the quieting of mind allows you to be aware of these noises? Do you feel your blood flowing, your heart beating, do you feel your feet on the floor, the seat beneath you, the temperature of the air, do you feel your body? Does it take effort, or again, merely the quieting of the mind so that the awareness expands through the sensations, connecting you to greater than self? What do you smell? As you’re taking inventory of yourself, your senses resonating with energy, you might have thoughts and emotions. Do not attack them, chase them off, label them, but also don’t hold them. Observe and let go. Are you aware that your breathing has now changed? Your energy level has changed. You’re calmer. You are now closer to realizing the Force. Accessing the Force is less about doing it, though we communicate it as ‘using.’ It is more about not doing something than doing something.”
“I think I feel it,” Ten said.
“Yeah, I see it, but don’t get attached to it, don’t try to hold it or force it or move it,” Jordeen said. Jordeen could see that Lestelle was participating. Freya moved a little closer, trying to perceive as they were.
“Just simply be in the moment.” She counted down from five.
“Now, ask yourself, who, or what, is actually experiencing these things.”
Ten stood up, pushing the chair away from the table. Freya actually took a step back.
“That is freaky!”
Jordeen chuckled, nodding.
“We are not these bodies, Ten. We are not our emotions. We are not our thoughts. We aren’t even our Light Bodies, the vehicle most often mistaken to be soul. We are multidimensional beings, beings of light, who are temporarily experiencing an organic modality. We are other first, not organics first. When you become reacquainted with who you really are, when you are comfortable again, then you will be able to lift the spoon without effort,” Jordeen said.
“Why?” Lestelle asked. It was not clear if she was waxing philosophical, or if she were sad.
“Why are we here if this is not who we are?”
“Experiences. Learning. The fastest way for an infinite being of limitless power and authority to learn something is to experience limitations,” Jordeen said.
“But I don’t want limitations,” Lestelle said.
“And it is that very not wanting that causes it to persist. It is the ‘not wanting,’ the running from, the denial of a property that magnetizes the very thing to us, causes it to grow in strength. Only by diving in, experiencing it fully, by releasing all attachment, both positive and negative, to a thing, does it finally cease to have apparent power over us, allowing us to move to the next lesson,” Jordeen said.
“Why am I only learning this now?” Lestelle asked.
Jordeen shrugged.
“Preston is an advanced soul, so proximity may be accelerating our process.”
“So, things are going to get better for us?” Ten asked.
“Or worse,” Jordeen said.
“It could also be, Lestelle, that you are simply ready for the next lesson. I don’t know. Only you can answer that question.”
The spoon came off the table. Jordeen smiled at Ten.
“Yay you!”
“I’m not doing it,” Ten said.
They turned to Lestelle.
“I’m not doing it,” Lestelle said.
“I think I understand now,” Freya said. She tilted her head and looked out into space. I am not just a Droid. I exist. I am.”
“How is this possible?” Lestelle asked.