III
Misdirected
Driving almost 2 hours on the highway nonstop, the van out of a sudden made hasty left turn like running away from pursuit and entered bumpy gravel road, my and Jafars shoulders touching each other after every single rise and fall. I heard him mumbling something like an old grumpy lady.
Bunlar düzgün deyil, plana görə belə olmamamlıydı (Something went wrong, it didn’t go the way it was planned)- he said slamming backside of his head to the left side .
What plan Jafar, what are you talking about ?
Hmm…
Don’t act like a stupid, you just uttered the word “plan”
I must…I thing…Damn it!...O.K… I think we are now being kidnapped, I mean you are being kidnapped.
So what, it’s already obvious
I mean your father didn’t plan your abduction.
What!
Just take it easy… I’ll tell you everything…We all know that you have this condition of yours, regarding the sunset
Yes
So all these traveling thing going on for several years has been part of great scam, mastermind of which is your billionaire father…Your daily flights all around the world for avoiding sundowning have all been invented to somehow help you relax. Don’t get it wrong. It doesn’t mean that your father, couldn’t afford to undertake your traveling expenses. The main issue was your being safe and sound. He couldn’t allow you to travel around the world on your own. He was concerned about your safety. Therefore instead of ordering at least 3 tickets daily and putting you on jeopardy, he hired best reality show producers and directors from France, the best designers, technicians and all, and constructed an enormous glass-enclosed studio along the river Kura, within hectares of unsettled lands, involved local and international artists, actors and actresses to make this scam more realistic and persuasive. You have never flown an inch on a plain. The thing about, takeoff and landing have been nothing but pitch-perfect balance of sound effects and vibration….Are you following me? –he asked to be sure if I was taking in this news all right.
- What about flying planes in the sky?
- Visual effects and only.
- What about you, Jafar, you say I befriended imposter playing the role of my bodyguard. What about this strike in airport, those raged passengers beating the hell out of manager, what about the bribery thing?
- As I’m saying, well designed plan, I’m sorry to say, but my real name is Tofig Arslanov, 29 years old actor from Azerbaijan Drama Theatre , people fighting amid strike are well-trained stunt-men and nobody was hurt, I assure you.
Too much for me for just one day. My heart pounded in my chest after what I heard. With my hands tied behind my back, I could only strike his leg with good kick, which I did.
- All those years, I’ve been f…n deceived, misled and you didn’t even give a sign, or somehow told me, what a junkie person you are Jafar…or whetever your name is?.
He bended towards leg to somehow relieve his pain.
- I totally understand your anger…. But you must also understand me. I’m professional actor paid to keep my mouse shut and do what I’ve been told to. I signed affidavit for not disclosing this scam to you or any third person, thus mass media and other agencies. It can sound insensitive , but to be honest, I think your father idea was brilliant, it very much helped your condition, by the way lighting has also been fake, I’ don’t know if you remember but in 90’s there was similar Hollywood movie “Truman show” where exchanging from daytime to nighttime was only the matter of one click of a button. I’m pretty sure your father was inspired by its screenplay when coming out with this plan.
- Now what? We are trapped in a van and most probably taken hostage by unknown people. I think they will hold us hostage for multi-million dollar ransom.
Van suddenly stopped. We heard two men getting out of car, speaking to each other in unknown language , grunting in a harsh tone. Crank of a backdoor latchet and they are in. I was scared to death as they climbed in. Also was my imposter bodyguard who appeared to be a junkie actor.
Move away your fu….en legs, or I’ll smash your face open with this hammer. – one of them told, shoving my feet aside, God knows for what. But after they grabbed “Jafar” ‘s shoulder and pulled him out of the car, it became apparent to me what was this all about
As they put gun on his head, he began to whine and beg like a poor baby.
Please don’t kill my. No matter who you are, I’m pretty sure they’ll pay ransom for me and the … - very loud gunshot and they didn’t even give him a chance to complete his last words
After what I heard, I felt my limbs numb, so shocked I was. Two of them kept on muttering something, and this time they climbed in for me. There are two kinds of people in terms of facing something extraordinary, force –majeure if you will. The one whose brain is stormed with ideas, making him as agile as a monkey, as fast as a NASCAR, and overall active. Unfortunately I belong to second group of people, who become motionless like an Egyptian mummy or Caspian shrimp caught out of seabed whilst facing unforeseen circumstances. Therefore I didn’t even bother to resist my kidnappers who gently took me from hands and legs, making me feel like dead body of a saint pilgrim killed by a sandstorm.
African sounding gunmen, put me on tough, arid and warm soil, outside the van, untied my arms with a sharp razor, removed the burlap sack, that badly scrubbed skin out of my nose amid total silence around. What I did see first was endless desert, destitute of any vegetation, on a pale background of fading daylight , and nothing but high and low dunes of monotone and tedious sand. Darkness is quickly beginning to fall,… the first sunset I watched in a years. I even temporally forgot about my fake bodyguard ‘Jafar’ – executed just minutes before. My God, Sundowning starts pressing me already. Just like a soul of person leaving for night-float while dreaming, I began gradually losing my rationality, fibril chill advancing from toes to head, I feel terrible nausea with strong inclination to vomit – the last time I remember to experience after have eaten two plates of Bozbash, bouillon with handful of beef meatballs. Here they are, in fade sunlight and gradually glowing moonlight I see my captors who stare at me, very much surprised of my condition. But to be honest , I’m the one –who is surprised most of all, because who stand in front of my, my captors or terrorists whoever they are, happened to be men in make-up of a funny clowns Bim-bom and Batatinha. I literally loath the clowns, because they used to give me bad time back when I was a kid. Not like they abused or assaulted me in kindergarten parties, just a fear which had grown to colossal level after I watched a particular horror movie with clown antagonist, after my 7th birthday. So in order to kill my fear I was going through a therapy of watching documentaries of friendly clowns, and those two rascals very much resembled aforementioned famous clowns of Portugal and Russia.
I couldn’t see them holding any weapons. Standing in front of me, me kneeled, unable to distinguish between their clownish gloomy makeup and real face expression. Batatinha – the one with black hat and bushy moustache, gave me a strong shake, to check my consciousness , whether I was aware and responsive to my surroundings. He reached for a small bottle of water in his pocket and handed it to me without saying a word. Bim-bom – the second one, instead uttered some angry words with African-English creole as if commenting the actions of his associate, hardly comprehended. Now image of sun completely vanished below the western horizon, my body and soul was invaded by heavy dizziness.
Hey , I osked Yuu….Du yu speak Inglish?
Yes – I bearly uttered.
Then fokin… drink this, boy.. its not water, it’s a remedy that will help your condition.
I did as I was told to. Sweetish, blue colored liquid instantly removed my dizziness and nausea. What was that, I wondered. I felt like completely cured of dementia after finishing the last drop of this magic sherbet. View of an evening sky cheered me up instead of previous desperation. As far as I knew, my father had invested millions of dollars to develop a unique scam system, hoping to somehow alleviate my pains, but couldn’t afford to find a proper scientist who can design this ‘God-bestowed’ formula….
Don’t even ask! – Luk streyt, - out of somewhere, a pink walkie –talkie appeared in his hand and he spoke to someone in his own language but with less aggressive tone, just like speaking to his superior – Now they’ll give you a sign with lantern blink two time…
Yes I see….- it was at least 3-5 kilometers away from where we were standing in empty desert. After second light signal had gone, I tried to concentrate my eyes on source of unknown message. With reddish-brownish pale color and cone shape, it utterly resembled wooden house with a red roof. But dark could be misleading, as my eyes were almost virgin to nighttime after all those years with my dementia. After several seconds of visual reconnaissance, I turned back to check whether kidnappers changed their minds. “Whatta…? You must be kidding me”. There was no sign of my captors, they vanished without giving me further instructions and they took the car as well, I guess. It was shocking to see the van gradually disappear in vast desert where I was left with no food and water to survive. After several minutes of deliberating , I threw off the empty bottle of this magic remedy, exhaled, got up to my feet and navigated myself across the dunes of high sands. The closer I get to the house, the stranger it becomes to experience the state of perplexity, the object i thought of as a little house on desert, actually was some kind of installation serving the entrance to a massive and endless passage leading God knows where.
“The second phase of assimilation to start within 10 seconds”
It was a loud voice of badass woman , spreading all surroundings with high volume. Have I lost my rationality, I would have thought that, somebody had been screaming from the sky, hiding behind the “rain-pregnant” clouds. Her voice made me creepy. Numb and confused, I checked my surroundings to identify the source. Not even a soul. Then began this dreadful countdown.
“Five…Four…Three…- I decided to enter the gate before she finishes on zero, like something bad’s gonna happen…- Two….One.” .
Total flash.
I knew that my eyes were wide open, but there were nothing to see other than complete paradoxal white color. “Is it heaven how they try to describe in cheap American dramas. This fascist voice raped my ears once again…
“Assimilation process. Second phase complete”
Who the fu.k are you and what-da fu.k do you want from me? Hey I cannot see anything, You filthy whore, I’m talking to you bitch.. Where am I?
Zum…Zum…Zum… just like the pixels from high definition screen, I saw allsurrounding white material distort, and transform into different shapes, changing their projection and shadow effects and as my eyes were getting used to this metamorphosis, I found myself in front of the gates of some Institution; school or kindergarten, before this devastating changes had finished.