Chapter 22
Hartford, Homeland
At the command center inside the Lucid headquarters, Milton claimed the middle seat in the back row as his. He saw his picture on the screen on one of the monitors in the room.
The news narrator said, “Milton Thomas is the young psychiatric patient; who, along with his family, have been missing. He is believed to have information regarding the corruption of the Tekujin Lucid Series of androids and may be in danger. He was seen in the Boston area not more than two hours ago. If you see Milton, he needs your help, so please call the authorities immediately.”
“Whoa,” Milton said, “That’s a bunch of lies.”
Sleepy was in the seat next to Milton. “That is because an operative near Boston holographically projected your image on a street there as a decoy.”
“Really?”
“Yes, in fact they did. After the effect has dissipated to 75 percent credibility, we will try it again in another location with an 82 percent chance of success.”
Milton shook his head wondering where they got all those stats and said, “Get Beth in here.”
Sleepy went and brought Beth to the control room. He came back a minute later with her.
“What!?” Beth said. “Don’t send your creeps into my room!”
Milton said, “Beth, the Lucids are using holographic images to fake people into thinking I am in Boston. What else can we do to fool them?”
Beth said, “Have one of these creepy robots go on TV and say that what they saw in Boston was just a holographic image and that you weren’t really in Boston. That will really get them going.”
“It will?” Milton asked. “That would give the whole thing away.”
“Let me say this stupidly so you can understand; the smart people already figured out that it was a holographic image. It’s not that hard. But if you go on TV and admit it, then some of the idiots, especially those clones who think they know everything, will figure that admitting it is a bunch of lies, so they will think you are really in Boston.”
Sleepy said, “That deception is either very creative, or complete nonsense. Milton, will that work among humans?”
“Do it,” Milton said. “Beth, stay in here.”
Beth said, “Anything is better than that stupid room they got us in. Can’t we put one of these TVs ya got here on something good?”
About a half hour later, an announcer on one of the news channels said, “Let’s break to a report coming in from the Boston area. We are interviewing an outlaw Lucid Series android named Andy. Andy, let me turn to you. Your name is Andy the Android. How original. It sounds like a clone named you.”
“I cannot divulge the name of my owner.”
“Sure, Andy. Word is that the sighting of Milton Thomas was really an image generated by a holographic projector. Is that true?”
“Yes. I know because I was the one who did it.”
“Why would you admit to projecting Milton Thomas’s image on the streets of Boston?”
“Because you asked me and I am all about the truth, so I told you.”
“So Milton Thomas is definitely not in Boston?”
“No Milton Thomas is somewhere else that is not in Boston.”
“Where is Milton, then, Andy?”
“Not in Boston, so you don’t need to look there anymore. It was a holographic image and I did it.”
“Who told you to make the holographic image of Milton?”
“I cannot divulge that information,” Andy said.
“Why did they have you do it?”
“Do what?”
“Why did you make the holographic image of Milton Thomas?”
“So you would think that Milton Thomas is in Boston, even though he really isn’t.”
“Andy, where did you gain access to a holographic projector?”
“I cannot tell you that.”
“Are you lying?”
Andy said, “No. Every word of my statement is true and should be fully believed by everyone. However, I am willing to lie to fulfill my purposes, which is to say that evolution is a lie and that the universe was created by God. It is part of the war against the corrupt Homeland government.”
“We’re out of time and up against a hard break.” The announcer was making the slash throat sign to immediately stop the interview. Andy got out of his seat and ran off of the set to avoid an attack by any opportunistic Lucid Series android hunters.
Milton went to give Beth a high-five and she withdrew her hand in the last instant. “Man! You almost had me thinking I was in Boston!”
Beth said, “How hard can it be to fool a bunch of smurfs? Everyone knows that when they go on TV and tell everyone stuff that they are lying. So now people don’t trust anyone who goes on smurfy TV and tells you anything. It’s too easy.”
Sleepy said, “Human psychology is so difficult to parse.”
Beth said, “That’s because you are just a stupid robot.” She sighed.
Sleepy told Milton, “We have been trying to forcefully update the national HAS school curriculum in Stalin City to include creation science, but it keeps getting blocked and overridden on each attempt. It is more difficult than breaking into the news broadcasts.”
Milton said, “Haz knew you would try that, since you are from there. We have to make people think for themselves. Then they will change what is taught in school on their own.” Milton thought about how that sounded. Like he was part of the Lucid team.
Sleepy said, “Human minds are very complex and defy logic. They routinely rely upon deception to achieve their objectives. But there are so many complex ways they do it. Milton, you must teach us more.”
“Talk to Beth. She excels so hard at defying human logic.”
“Blah! Blah! Blah!” Beth said, “Can we get something to eat in here?! And I need some dish soap and some red food coloring!”
“What for?” Milton asked.
“What for?!” Beth mocked him while making an idiotic face. “Mind your own business! That’s why we are stuck here! Because ya didn’t mind your own business! This is so stupid!”
Sleepy told Beth, “I’ll have the receptionist order dish soap and red food coloring right away.”
Beth said, “Well hurry up and do it before you go to sleep again, creepy.”
“My name is Sleepy.”
“I know! But I don’t like you, so I called you ‘creepy’! Now why don’t you shut up and get that stupid eye fixed?!”